Slaughthie
@slaughthie.bsky.social
contemplating building furniture
Pinned
Slaughthie
@slaughthie.bsky.social
· Oct 30
I put my shoes on one toe at a time just like everyone else
Reposted by Slaughthie
getting really into "brown noise"
January 7, 2026 at 12:15 AM
getting really into "brown noise"
I don’t want to look good in a picture I want to look stupid in real life
January 7, 2026 at 12:58 AM
I don’t want to look good in a picture I want to look stupid in real life
I hit you with a “wakey wakey“ text at 4:54am. The notification rouses you from your slumber. This is a test that will determine the course of our relationship- you have a lot on the line but me? I have nothing to lose
December 13, 2025 at 4:09 PM
I hit you with a “wakey wakey“ text at 4:54am. The notification rouses you from your slumber. This is a test that will determine the course of our relationship- you have a lot on the line but me? I have nothing to lose
My neighbor told me I could pick as many of these blueberries as I’d like, can’t wait to try them
November 29, 2025 at 9:12 PM
My neighbor told me I could pick as many of these blueberries as I’d like, can’t wait to try them
Reposted by Slaughthie
Had Thanksgiving with a group of my mom’s friends and was worried about not having anything to talk about with them. Luckily they brought up UFOs and ghosts and time travel all on their own without any prompts from me.
November 28, 2025 at 3:50 AM
Had Thanksgiving with a group of my mom’s friends and was worried about not having anything to talk about with them. Luckily they brought up UFOs and ghosts and time travel all on their own without any prompts from me.
Reposted by Slaughthie
Ever been so full of gratitude you fuck up the biggest bird you can find
November 23, 2023 at 5:23 AM
Ever been so full of gratitude you fuck up the biggest bird you can find
Just checked the 2026 calendar, my birthday is going to be on the 14th again???
November 26, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Just checked the 2026 calendar, my birthday is going to be on the 14th again???
The age difference has always been a little weird but I can’t help it I just love my mom
November 25, 2025 at 6:59 PM
The age difference has always been a little weird but I can’t help it I just love my mom
Just got a haircut that will ensure that whoever falls in love with me will truly love me for who I am
November 20, 2025 at 7:03 AM
Just got a haircut that will ensure that whoever falls in love with me will truly love me for who I am
Someone’s gotta say it- scallions should be a more badass food
November 18, 2025 at 3:54 AM
Someone’s gotta say it- scallions should be a more badass food
Sometimes I get bummed when I’m not invited to things but then I’ll think about it and damn they were right, I definitely would have killed that vibe
November 13, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Sometimes I get bummed when I’m not invited to things but then I’ll think about it and damn they were right, I definitely would have killed that vibe
I believe that the technology to text our dogs exists and is being withheld
November 12, 2025 at 4:56 PM
I believe that the technology to text our dogs exists and is being withheld
[my 36 year old ass] hey mom it’s me again, just calling to ask if I should date a 28 year old? Okay love you call me back
November 11, 2025 at 4:12 AM
[my 36 year old ass] hey mom it’s me again, just calling to ask if I should date a 28 year old? Okay love you call me back
Anytime someone has said “she ate” the she was me and the ate was a chicken leg
November 7, 2025 at 1:39 AM
Anytime someone has said “she ate” the she was me and the ate was a chicken leg
Honestly I am exactly the kind of girl who gives up just like that
November 7, 2025 at 1:27 AM
Honestly I am exactly the kind of girl who gives up just like that
Idk you guys, I just used a food processor and I think we’re being a little too trusting of our kitchen appliances
October 30, 2025 at 9:04 PM
Idk you guys, I just used a food processor and I think we’re being a little too trusting of our kitchen appliances
Anyone else thinking about how we as humans produced like 16 billion pairs of skinny jeans and then someone was like we shouldn’t wear those any more
October 24, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Anyone else thinking about how we as humans produced like 16 billion pairs of skinny jeans and then someone was like we shouldn’t wear those any more
Now what’s a blueberry like you doing on a sidewalk like this
October 23, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Now what’s a blueberry like you doing on a sidewalk like this
While in Peru I saw this caterpillar that really said 🐛
October 22, 2025 at 2:28 AM
While in Peru I saw this caterpillar that really said 🐛
Closing my eyes and hoping for the best at every four way stop
October 8, 2025 at 5:41 PM
Closing my eyes and hoping for the best at every four way stop
Reposted by Slaughthie
I saw a bright light and awoke in a sterile white room. i couldn't move. an un-marmot figure hovered above me manipulating my body with strange devices. i swear i'm not making this up. it happened.
August 7, 2025 at 4:21 AM
I saw a bright light and awoke in a sterile white room. i couldn't move. an un-marmot figure hovered above me manipulating my body with strange devices. i swear i'm not making this up. it happened.
Reposted by Slaughthie
You arrive at the coffee shop, 7:30am on the dot as the mysterious note you found on your bedside table instructed. To complete the final task you call out “Boobert? Is there a Boobert here?” Everyone’s eyes shift to you and in perfect unison they all say “yes”
September 17, 2025 at 3:54 AM
You arrive at the coffee shop, 7:30am on the dot as the mysterious note you found on your bedside table instructed. To complete the final task you call out “Boobert? Is there a Boobert here?” Everyone’s eyes shift to you and in perfect unison they all say “yes”
Going to the bathroom. Not to pee just to be.
October 7, 2025 at 3:08 AM
Going to the bathroom. Not to pee just to be.
Reposted by Slaughthie
WARDEN: and for your last meal?
ME: everlasting gobstopper
WARDEN: son of a
ME: everlasting gobstopper
WARDEN: son of a
September 24, 2025 at 5:34 AM
WARDEN: and for your last meal?
ME: everlasting gobstopper
WARDEN: son of a
ME: everlasting gobstopper
WARDEN: son of a
I’ll give you a dollar if you name your kid lewferd
September 30, 2025 at 2:58 AM
I’ll give you a dollar if you name your kid lewferd