Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Nick from your hometown

@soquiet.bsky.social

180 followers 500 following 350 posts

"There's old Nick! I haven't seen him in a minute! Oh God, what happened to him?"

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 28m

Convo overheard: "Catholics know hell is real, and hope for a heaven. Protestants know heaven is real, and suspect a hell."

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 23h

The opposite of love is not hate. And the opposite of grief is not being wrestled to the ground with my dick out, trying my hardest to piss in that fucker's open casket.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Can't wait to be a big fish on a small grill.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Bitch ass Sharon's secret ingredient "navy beans". Fuckin Sharon.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Catch me if you can. I'm the middle aged white man man.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Dude, I'm bad at posting. Fuckin posting responses on the wrong person's shit. I mean jokes is jokes, but damn. I need a sandwich, to regulate.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Fuckem. Fillin dem pocket with cheese. Whole wedges.

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

I'm shoplifting, at Whole Foods, is what I'm saying. Mercilessly.

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

My jealously, papalpable. My leisure appropriate cargo shorts: full of cake.

2 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

No! I'm not allowed in Whole Foods anymore. They caught me with my ingenious "ringing up beer as bananas" scheme.

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Ha! Jokes on you. I'm married, so I already have a mom.

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

My weakness: butterscotch. And booze. And attention.

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Friendship is understanding each other's weaknesses and enabling them.

2 2

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Great! *stirs Metamucil into your red wine*

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Full hearts, empty head, can't lose!

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Dream scenario: getting sloppy on Depp's red wine in Nick Cage's castle. Good times... We'd all shit in Amber Heard's bed, as a practical joke.

2 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

All great artists were unappreciated in their time. I was, like, the belle of the ball on Google+.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

He always struck me as more of a solo artist. I might just be thinking of Depp as a character though. Or Tim Burton. Wasn't there a divorce in there somewhere?

1 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Ok, you got me. I've been drinkin'.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

It'd make a great name for a barber shop quartet!

2 1

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

It was named Giant Sloth first, but that was deemed "not hardcore". The following name was "Scissor Sisters", but that was copywrited.

1 2

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

My DMs are telephonic!

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Still have beers with Micheal sometimes. DM him, "Having a beer." He DMs me back, "Back at ya!" Peak male friendship.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

Few people who own a Jeep look like they own a Jeep. Everyone who owns a minivan looks like they own a minivan.

Nick from your hometown @soquiet.bsky.social · 2d

I'd land and just, like, take a nap.