Valerie Tosi
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valerietosi.bsky.social
Valerie Tosi
@valerietosi.bsky.social
Comedian seen on Conan • Producer + Host of Mermaid Comedy Hour • Writer of Girl Code game • Narrator of Weird History Food • Debut Album “Beach Trash” out now • Pinball Nerd
Reposted by Valerie Tosi
(And if you've never seen the show he created, Stan Against Evil... you really, really should. It's fantastic. And make sure you watch the fantastic @valerietosi.bsky.social fulfilling her life's purpose of basically being Dana Scully in an episode of it.)
November 7, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Thanks for the lovely press @vanyaland.bsky.social.

Come see me while you can, New England! 🦞
March 28, 2025 at 5:07 PM
What it’s like being an American right now
March 22, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Forever 21 filing for bankruptcy right before I turn 40 feels like it’s my fault for getting old.
March 19, 2025 at 4:00 AM
Avoid a government shutdown? My dudes, there isn’t a government left to shutdown.
March 11, 2025 at 4:51 PM
Southwest really out here cash grabbing for checked bags while 1 out of 10 planes are falling from the sky.
March 11, 2025 at 2:50 PM
High key recommend working w women as unhinged as you 👰🏼‍♀️
March 10, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Even the San Andreas Fault is mad Demi Moore didn’t win.
March 3, 2025 at 6:21 AM
Reposted by Valerie Tosi
I’m producing a new standup show in LA and I would be awful obliged if you would come. Amazing lineup for the first one, with a lot of old and new favorites. Also there will be real hot biscuits and a bar there.

squadup.com/events/107055
February 28, 2025 at 5:21 AM
I’m so sick of every democratic politician posting these robotic and gutless messages. Screw nice. I want you posting with the energy of a drunk, rabid raccoon trapped in a chimney.
January 29, 2025 at 3:04 AM
Not to be dramatic, but I need John Oliver back on the air before I have an aneurysm.
January 28, 2025 at 6:18 AM
Happy Mermaid Monday! Join us  ✨ TONIGHT ✨ at the the Hollywood Improv and help us raise money for Altadena Girls, who aid teen girls during the LA wildfire recovery. Tickets here: https://s.mtrbio.com/kdqxwptkra
January 27, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I’ve been pretty good about not roasting my brother in my set lately. He’s a good kid. That said, massive shoutout and high five to Jeff Arcuri for roasting his ass so hard, literally, at the Clearwater, FL show tonight. If you were there, he’s the shart guy.
January 26, 2025 at 6:32 AM
Reposted by Valerie Tosi
if they want to go back to the 1950s, we’re bringing the cuisine back to the 1950s too. you put me in the kitchen, I will spend 100% of my time in there finding how much horseradish and shrimp I can put in Jello before God personally comes down here to stop me.
January 24, 2025 at 9:26 PM
Not falling into a well of despair has become a full-time, unpaid internship.
January 24, 2025 at 5:10 PM
I’m watching a documentary on lizard people and it feels nice to believe in something harmless.
January 24, 2025 at 5:40 AM
Time travelers will face quite a conundrum when choosing which villain from our timeline to eliminate first.
January 24, 2025 at 3:49 AM
🗣️ Listen up LA residents! 🗣️

Sign & share!
In the wake of the fires, LA production is hurting even more than before. People can’t afford to live here if there isn’t work here.

Sign our petition at the link in bio STAYinLA.org and share #STAYinLA widely. (And thank you to hireyoungprofessionals.com for designing our campaign!)
#StayinLA
Help Rebuild LA’s Production Industry The Palisades and Eaton Fires have deepened the crisis for LA’s film/TV workers, small businesses, and families. We need emergency incentives to bring production ...
STAYinLA.org
January 24, 2025 at 1:04 AM
A movie musical AND a horror film are nominated for Best Picture. Historic day for intersectional nerds.
January 23, 2025 at 4:41 PM
You know who should create a new social media platform? Keanu Reeves. The vibe would be transcendent.
January 23, 2025 at 2:38 AM
They are literally forcing us all to follow these ghoulish dictators over on Meta platforms. Now with AI in play and evolving rapidly, get ready for an even bigger shitstorm of misinformation.
January 22, 2025 at 1:58 AM
How many days out are we from Elon starting a n*zi salute challenge on TikTok?
January 21, 2025 at 9:56 PM
The Numbing™ begins Jan 20th. Horror movies persist but so do I.
January 19, 2025 at 5:30 AM
TAKE MY MONEY BUT THEN GIVE ME BACK MORE OF IT #CES2025
January 6, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Get the bail money ready!
December 10, 2024 at 4:56 AM