NewYearNewMeltdownFor cheapskates who don't tip their doorman at Christmas.
January 2, 2026 at 12:41 AM
NewYearNewMeltdownFor cheapskates who don't tip their doorman at Christmas.
NewYearNewMeltdownFor uh, El Paso, maybe? Not where I thought it would start.
January 2, 2026 at 12:40 AM
NewYearNewMeltdownFor uh, El Paso, maybe? Not where I thought it would start.
#NewYearNewMeltdownFor out elected leadership.
January 2, 2026 at 12:35 AM
#NewYearNewMeltdownFor out elected leadership.
#ThisYearWillBeFullOf more fun and surprises than you can possibly imagine.
January 1, 2026 at 10:06 PM
#ThisYearWillBeFullOf more fun and surprises than you can possibly imagine.
#MyFirstDayInTheNewYear Is it New Year's already? Crap, I hope I remembered to get drunk.
January 1, 2026 at 10:00 PM
#MyFirstDayInTheNewYear Is it New Year's already? Crap, I hope I remembered to get drunk.
#WhenYoureOnMyMindI believe, obey, want, respect, love, trade. It's like I can't help myself.
December 29, 2025 at 3:21 AM
#WhenYoureOnMyMindI believe, obey, want, respect, love, trade. It's like I can't help myself.
#YouNeedToTryThis but not in the school library. Librarians got no sense of humor
December 29, 2025 at 2:24 AM
#YouNeedToTryThis but not in the school library. Librarians got no sense of humor
#YouNeedToTryThis we call it snakeball.
December 29, 2025 at 2:16 AM
#YouNeedToTryThis we call it snakeball.
#YouNeedToTryThis just to know how much you hate it.
December 29, 2025 at 2:07 AM
#YouNeedToTryThis just to know how much you hate it.
Saint #InnocentOf Alaska and Tweety
December 27, 2025 at 3:46 AM
Saint #InnocentOf Alaska and Tweety
I am #InnocentOf all charges. I don't even know whose head - I mean what you think you found.
December 27, 2025 at 3:35 AM
I am #InnocentOf all charges. I don't even know whose head - I mean what you think you found.
Please, Molly, tell me you're #InnocentOf racketeering in drugs.
December 27, 2025 at 3:17 AM
Please, Molly, tell me you're #InnocentOf racketeering in drugs.
#BreakingTheChainsForTheNewYear means the Spooky Man could get you!
December 27, 2025 at 3:09 AM
#BreakingTheChainsForTheNewYear means the Spooky Man could get you!
#BreakingTheChainsForTheNewYear is nothing. I ever show you girls how I shoot ping pong balls?
December 27, 2025 at 2:28 AM
#BreakingTheChainsForTheNewYear is nothing. I ever show you girls how I shoot ping pong balls?
#MyChristmasEveIs reserved for John McClane and Jesus.
December 24, 2025 at 9:11 PM
#MyChristmasEveIs reserved for John McClane and Jesus.
#GetSentimental reflect upon your former earthly existence.
December 20, 2025 at 3:53 AM
#GetSentimental reflect upon your former earthly existence.
#GetSentimental go pester the dead folk.
December 20, 2025 at 3:36 AM
#GetSentimental go pester the dead folk.
#IOnlyWearUglySweatersWhen robbing banks.
December 19, 2025 at 9:28 PM
#IOnlyWearUglySweatersWhen robbing banks.
#IOnlyWearUglySweatersWhen they reflect the reason for the season.
December 19, 2025 at 9:24 PM
#IOnlyWearUglySweatersWhen they reflect the reason for the season.
#MyNewAccessoryIs the hat from Burn!
December 15, 2025 at 3:07 AM
#MyNewAccessoryIs the hat from Burn!
Thank you, Lord, but #NoOneNeedsTo be told not to miss the Great Snatch.
December 15, 2025 at 2:44 AM
Thank you, Lord, but #NoOneNeedsTo be told not to miss the Great Snatch.