Wealth is wasted on the wealthy

It would be stupid not to accept a gift of a free plane? Donold, let me tell you a story about a wooden horse...

You can’t say criminals don’t deserve due process when due process is the thing that decides if they're criminals. Otherwise you're just kidnapping people you don't like.

We finally fixed illegal immigration (nobody wants to come here anymore)

baby are you tickle me elmo, cuz you looked super cute when i first saw you, but you scared the shit out of me once i picked you up

Too much news

I remember watching Star Wars as a kid and asking myself, who would voluntarily join the dark side? I understood Darth Vader's motivation, but not the stormtrooper's.

This is Huxley. He hopes you're having a good day, but if not, he’s conveniently right here and an excellent listener. 14/10 (IG: hugoandursula)

I'm depressed so I'm going to make more cheddar sourdough

then I'll still be depressed, but, and this is crucial, I'll have cheddar sourdough

Where’s the click-to-cancel option for this administration?

APPARENTLY you gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser, you gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger, you gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

i *just* found this out. fuck. FUCK

You had different dreams for yourself than having to meet this shit historical moment.

I did too. I did too.

The bad thing about rewatching Gilmore Girls is remembering how good Kiwi Strawberry Hansen’s soda was and not being able to get it

New social media platforms always offer the allure of a new online version of yourself. Who will Bluesky me be?