Bar Mageddon
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barmageddon.bsky.social
Bar Mageddon
@barmageddon.bsky.social
4.8K followers 530 following 21K posts
Writer, millennial, certified baby whisperer. My phone has been on silent since 2011 and everyone can just deal with it. What Would Jim Larkin Do?

sports alt: https://bsky.app/profile/robadelphia.gobirds.online
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barmageddon.bsky.social
image of ollie the weatherman from family guy standing in front of a map of the US. text says IT’S GON YUCK.
February 13, 2026 at 12:40 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image of the dwarf gimli from the lord of the rings movies. he has a big helmet and a lot of beard and he’s looking at someone off screen. it’s from the scene where he says he never thought he’d die fighting side by side with an elf, and legolas says what about side by side with a friend? and gimli says hell yeah get down here and give me a hug you big pointy-eared freakoid and legolas is like first of all ew second of all get serious this is serious.
February 12, 2026 at 8:51 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
you did the tweet
screenshot of a tweet that says Twitter the only place where well articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes” and somebody will say “So you hate waffles?” No bitch. dat’s a whole new sentence. wtf is you talkin about
February 12, 2026 at 7:08 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
logging on
photo of a man falling through the air with all four limbs extended. he’s above the clouds. he’s wearing shorts and no shirt. he doesn’t have a parachute.
February 11, 2026 at 3:31 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of a bluseky drafts folder with three drafts in it first says “omg ofc not ur so paranoid???” second says “i’m breaking up with you!!!” third says “the remote is the clit of the television”
February 9, 2026 at 9:20 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
why does this feel like an insult
a bunch of tiny dots that look like stars in the sky. one is circled and has my handle. a nearby cluster says irreverent internet comedians
February 9, 2026 at 4:20 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image of jerry stiller on the show seinfeld. he’s yelling at someone off screen in jerry’s apartment. text says ass man, except the word man has been covered over so now it says ass brand!
February 9, 2026 at 12:55 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image taken from the viral video of a guy saying "road work ahead, i sure hope it does." it's a man looking at the camera from inside a moving vehicle. outside the car someone has inexplicably added a woman in a pee crouch. why would someone do this. we do not know.
February 8, 2026 at 9:52 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
and wolverine wins gold
#olympics
a photo of my tv showing a shirtless man screaming and flexing at the bottom of a slope. text on the screen shows that austrian benjamin karl won gold in the men’s snowboard parallel giant slalom at the winter olympics
February 8, 2026 at 2:00 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
tyshawn jones, 2-time thrasher skater of the year:
screenshot of text. three questions and three answers. Would you be in the Olympics if we make it there? Hell yeah! You don’t think it’d be corny and lame? No? What would be corny and lame about it? A lot of people hate the idea of it, making skating a full blown sport. There’s a lot of people who hate on everything. You can’t care about what people say. People hating ain’t doing shit. Who wouldn’t want to be an Olympic gold medalist? You get to say you won the Olympics. The person hating ain’t ever gonna get to say that cause they’re sitting there hating.
February 8, 2026 at 12:06 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
and people say comedy is dead
screenshot of two bluesky posts. the posters’ names have been removed. the first says “I didn't know they made camo legging in mens sizes.” the second says “i didn’t know they made camo leggings for men. makes sense, i guess.”
February 7, 2026 at 9:05 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image of rudolph the red nosed reindeer still image of stevie J rubbing his hands together with a big smile like he's about to eat some reindeer organs
February 7, 2026 at 3:58 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of text that says good morning. happy new year. wanna come watch the olympics and hang with the kids and i today? still image of michael scott in the office. text says. absolutely. but not really.
February 7, 2026 at 2:49 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
ra ra rasputin, lover of the russian queen
Jake Lang kicking over a PROSECUTE ICE pop up sign and looking like two pigs fighting under a blanket
February 7, 2026 at 2:20 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
a version of the thumbs up meme featuring coach jerry and rob as kids. the picture of jerry is the one he posted of him smiling with his legs behind his head. the picture of me is my adorable smiling child head on a stick figure. child jerry says bet you can't do this to child rob reading a book. child rob stick out a big thumb and resumes reading. child jerry bounces away on his ass.
February 7, 2026 at 12:32 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
fuckin excuse me
screenshot of weather app. extreme cold warning weather onset 6 AM february 7 Description For the Extreme Cold Warning, dangerously cold wind chills as low as 15 degrees below zero expected. For the High Wind Warning, northwest winds 25 to 35 mph with gusts up to 60 mph expected.
February 6, 2026 at 4:14 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of two tweets. the first is of a brick wall with graffiti on it that says "i piss on my self and i like the smell of my piss." a reply underneath is from nazi agitator jake lang and it says "they are charging me with a felony for $6000 in damage I'm being taken to Ramsey county jail in minnesota."
February 6, 2026 at 1:36 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image from a viral video of an ICE agent slipping on some ice and falling on his ass on a minnesota residential street, except the agent has been removed and replaced with nazi agitator jake lang doing a goofy kicking motion that looks like he's slipping
February 6, 2026 at 12:54 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
ah but you didn’t zoom in far enough
my head is inside the zero on my lock screen, but now there’s also a tiny head on my shoulder
February 4, 2026 at 11:05 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
from a photo i took a long time ago that i’ve always loved
photo of the top a spinning globe. the background is mostly darkness with some blurry dots of blue, purple, and pink. it almost looks like the globe is a planet spinning in space.
February 4, 2026 at 10:48 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
here’s mine btw
picture of my phone’s lock screen. the image is black at the top, then some magenta, light blue, and purple blurs that are formless. then the bottom is what appears to be a spinning sphere, like a planet or something. you can’t tell because only a portion of the sphere is visible. overall it’s a pretty cool image that seems kind of sci-fi.
February 4, 2026 at 9:47 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image of a wide-eyed tim robinson in a hot dog suit speaking while gesturing to something off screen. a bluesky logo has been added to the part of the hot dog above his forehead. text over the hand that is gesturing says "moderation that defies logic."
February 4, 2026 at 4:58 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
chappell roan allowing you a smile. text says you deciding to follow me chappell roan with an open-mouthed expression of WTF. text says you immediately after following me chappell roan squinting at you. text says you trying to remember why TF you followed me chappell roan, head back, eyes half shut, done with your bullshit. text says you going click click mute.
February 2, 2026 at 2:37 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
“now you get this straight, shitkicker. don’t you go mistaking me for some whole other body. you got your brains in your dick if you think we’re just gonna fade away. we’re gonna be here until this thing’s finished.”
still image from the movie mississippi burning. it’s a close up of actor gene hackman in another man’s face, and the other man is wincing in pain. hackman is saying something with angry intensity.
February 1, 2026 at 7:03 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
now rewatching:
promotional image for the film mississippi burning. actors gene hackman and willem defoe are shown in suits in front of a burning cross. large text says mississippi burning.
February 1, 2026 at 5:27 PM