Blythe Chadim
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blythewrites.bsky.social
Blythe Chadim
@blythewrites.bsky.social
77 followers 81 following 46 posts
Geriatric millennial and permanently tired toddler mom, trying to find the humor in life’s craziness—and write about it.
Posts Replies Media Videos
blythewrites.bsky.social
Five pounds is a lot of leeway Tinsel Tubbies.
#comedy #holidays #christmas #politics #satire
medium.com/@blythewrite...
Pete Hegseth’s Message to the Troops Regarding Holiday Weight Gain
Don’t say I never gave you anything–five pounds is a lot of leeway, Tinsel Tubbies.
medium.com
December 22, 2025 at 2:07 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
belladonnacomedy.bsky.social
“So from now on, it’s Comic Sans only in this office.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social

Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/pete-hegseth...
December 12, 2025 at 4:01 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
So from now on, it’s Comic Sans only in this office, because war is fun and it’s time we started acting like it.
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#war #petehegseth #fonts #satire #comedy #comicsans
thebelladonnacomedy.com/pete-hegseth...
Pete Hegseth Announces New Font Guidelines to Make War Fun Again
So from now on, it’s Comic Sans only in this office.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
December 12, 2025 at 1:33 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
belladonnacomedy.bsky.social
“‘The Witcher’ is still on, though given reviews of Season Four, our viewers seem to agree it shouldn’t be.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social

Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/netflixs-hol...
December 5, 2025 at 4:09 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Check out my latest piece* in @thebelladonna.bsky.social for answers to your burning @netflix.com Witcher S4 questions.
*This is satire.
#TheWitcher #Netflix #comedy #HenryCavill #satire
thebelladonnacomedy.com/netflixs-hol...
Netflix’s Holiday Binge-Watching FAQs to Explain ‘The Witcher: Season Four’ So Your Brother-in-Law…
‘The Witcher’ is still on, though given reviews of Season Four, our viewers seem to agree it shouldn’t be.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
December 5, 2025 at 1:52 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Are you ready to rock!?! 🤘 Or at the very least ready to stand and nod your head rhythmically but carefully so as not to throw your neck out? Check out my new piece. #rock #humor #millennial
medium.com/slackjaw/wer...
We’re That Rock Band You Liked 30 Years Ago, Here To Set Expectations For Our Reunion Tour
We’re still rock ‘n roll as fuck, even if we’re ending our shows at 8 p.m.
medium.com
November 25, 2025 at 2:09 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Give your office copy machine a little diddle. It needs it. And check out my latest piece @pointsincase.com
#comedy #funny #office #work
www.pointsincase.com/articles/a-p...
A Plea for Intimacy from the Forgotten Office Copy Machine
Just because you don't need me to print those big Excel spreadsheets anymore doesn’t mean I don’t want my buttons fingered regularly.
www.pointsincase.com
October 9, 2025 at 12:39 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
frazzledhumor.bsky.social
Does your toddler like dates? How about a playdate next Tuesday?

By @blythewrites.bsky.social

medium.com/frazzled/is-...
“Is That a Monster Truck in Your Pocket?” and Other Pickup Lines I’m Using to Make Mom Friends
Does your toddler like dates? How about a playdate next Tuesday?
medium.com
September 12, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
belladonnacomedy.bsky.social
“Aside from the 10 Commandments in Hand-Chiseled Tablet Form.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social

Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
August 20, 2025 at 3:00 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Happy first full week of school to all who celebrate!
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#school #texaspolitics #satire #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Items Required to Be Displayed in All Texas Classrooms This Fall
Aside from the 10 Commandments in Hand-Chiseled Tablet Form
thebelladonnacomedy.com
August 20, 2025 at 12:39 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Love this new piece by Luís Leal Miranda in @pointsincase.com. I have also encountered plenty of three dimensional beings who lack depth. Maybe this will help with those awkward conversations.
www.pointsincase.com/articles/how...
How to Explain a Hole to a Two-Dimensional Being
A clumsy answer could lead to confusion. Too much detail, and you risk sending your flat friend into an existential spiral.
www.pointsincase.com
July 30, 2025 at 2:33 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Check out my latest piece in Slackjaw. #apocalypse #dramas #tv #satire
medium.com/slackjaw/for...
For Authenticity’s Sake, This Post-Apocalyptic Drama Needs More Dead Kids
Hey, don’t look at me like I’m the monster.
medium.com
July 14, 2025 at 1:17 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Thanks @robotbutt.bsky.social for publishing this piece. #canada #apologies #satire
www.robotbutt.com/2025/06/26/o...
O Canada, Please Accept These Apologies so We Can Be Besties Again | Robot Butt
Canada, we would like to formally apologize.
www.robotbutt.com
June 27, 2025 at 12:37 AM
blythewrites.bsky.social
I don't know about anyone else, but I've always wondered what my life would be like in a car commercial.
Love this @rj-x.bsky.social.
#satire #comedy
May 29, 2025 at 12:21 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Check out my latest satire in @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social. Friend link below.
#satire #comedy #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
Hey America, It’s Your Boy, Satan.
Seriously, though, none of this is on me.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
May 28, 2025 at 12:16 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Check out my new satire featured on @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social.
belladonnacomedy.bsky.social The Belladonna Comedy @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social · May 26
“Seriously, though, none of this is on me.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social

Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
May 26, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
mcsweeneys.net
"Since 1988, we’ve been waiting for the future to arrive at Little League concession stands and any place that smells like popcorn and feet. But now that the future is here, we regret to announce that we are extremely disappointed."
This Isn’t the Future We at Dippin’ Dots Envisioned
Since 1988, we at Dippin’ Dots have proudly sold the official ice cream of the future. And ever since, we’ve been waiting for the future to arrive ...
buff.ly
May 22, 2025 at 3:25 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social!
#satire #parenting #humor
medium.com/frazzled/7-w...
7 Ways to Reanimate Your Life After Motherhood Hijacked Your Body and Mind Like That Fungus From…
You’re still you; it just doesn’t always feel like it
medium.com
April 30, 2025 at 1:27 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Just about every situation can be managed in Samuel L. Jackson movie quotes, including conversations with your stockbroker.
#satire #comedy #writing #moviequotes
medium.com/the-haven/sa...
Samuel L. Jackson Movie Quotes or Conversations With My Stockbroker?
Who can tell anymore?
medium.com
April 22, 2025 at 4:19 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
Sharing my latest comedy piece.
#satire #comedy #writing
medium.com/the-haven/wh...
What Your Pole Decor Says About You This Flag-Waving Season
Traditional American Flag:
medium.com
April 18, 2025 at 4:37 PM
blythewrites.bsky.social
So excited for my Second City classmate Elaine. I love this piece! thebelladonnacomedy.com/my-to-do-lis...
My To Do List After Watching “With Love, Meghan”
Get a bee guy.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
April 18, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
mcsweeneys.net
"Yes, there’s danger in opening our gates to this statue. But there’s also danger in keeping it out… the danger of eroding the sanctity of the gift-giving process."
Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
“In the wake of votes by a handful of key Democrats, led by Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, to pass a GOP-led continuing resolution funding f...
www.mcsweeneys.net
March 22, 2025 at 12:30 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
mcsweeneys.net
"We're doing just whatever we feel like with no foresight, illustrating one of the Willy-Nilly System’s central tenets: There are no wrong answers because we should not assess any of our decisions before implementing them."
Introducing the Willy-Nilly System of Governance
The Willy-Nilly System of Governance is a hybrid model that brings together both definitions of the term willy-nilly: “in a careless way without pl...
www.mcsweeneys.net
March 12, 2025 at 1:20 AM
blythewrites.bsky.social
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social for publishing! And shout out to my beautiful children for inspiring my writing 😜
frazzledhumor.bsky.social Frazzled Humor @frazzledhumor.bsky.social · Mar 7
6:41 AM: Threenager must get dressed immediately. The meltdown brewing threatens to ignite a blaze of Quarth-summoning fury if you can’t figure out how to travel back in time and dress Threenager before this exact moment.

By @blythewrites.bsky.social

medium.com/frazzled/a-d...
A Day in the Life of Quarth, Bringer of Tantrums (AKA: Your Threenager)
It’s a good thing they’re cute
medium.com
March 7, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
thedailyshow.com
Who’s playing along with Pete tonight?!
March 5, 2025 at 12:30 AM