Pants, the Uromancer🧙♂️💦👖
@captainpants.bsky.social
👖legwear👖respect👖zone👖 (pronouns he/they)
Cursed new name time? Sure, why not! Embracing my inner piss wizard. (Whizzard?)
November 29, 2025 at 6:57 AM
Cursed new name time? Sure, why not! Embracing my inner piss wizard. (Whizzard?)
I *kinda* feel like I'm screeching into a void lately – even more intensely than I've grown accustomed to over the years. Ghosted in the middle of projects, seeing emails and messages ignored, that sort of thing. Compounding it with personal strife as of late, I'm...completely exhausted here.
November 3, 2025 at 2:04 AM
I *kinda* feel like I'm screeching into a void lately – even more intensely than I've grown accustomed to over the years. Ghosted in the middle of projects, seeing emails and messages ignored, that sort of thing. Compounding it with personal strife as of late, I'm...completely exhausted here.
I know we're over thirteen years past the release of The Dark Knight Rises, but I'm *still* going to bust out The Silly Bane Voice whenever necessary (and it is necessary *quite often*).
August 20, 2025 at 4:00 AM
I know we're over thirteen years past the release of The Dark Knight Rises, but I'm *still* going to bust out The Silly Bane Voice whenever necessary (and it is necessary *quite often*).
Hypomanic Flamboyant Conference-Mode Pants is currently in full bloom and I'm LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT
August 12, 2025 at 5:49 AM
Hypomanic Flamboyant Conference-Mode Pants is currently in full bloom and I'm LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT
Hooray, annual conference time! Gonna be a giant nerd for a week in Anaheim! 🤓🎉
August 9, 2025 at 7:17 AM
Hooray, annual conference time! Gonna be a giant nerd for a week in Anaheim! 🤓🎉
Hypomania Lobster Roll. Sounds like 57-1 odds to me!
Panic Smoothie. I’d bet on her.
Anxiety Pasta Salad
July 14, 2025 at 1:53 AM
Hypomania Lobster Roll. Sounds like 57-1 odds to me!
Having a fair bit of fun with Dune: Awakening so far! I may, however, have been discussing the game with my coworkers and described avoiding an encounter with a sandworm as not getting "vored" which...led to some...conversations...
...game's a blast, though!
...game's a blast, though!
July 3, 2025 at 12:40 AM
Having a fair bit of fun with Dune: Awakening so far! I may, however, have been discussing the game with my coworkers and described avoiding an encounter with a sandworm as not getting "vored" which...led to some...conversations...
...game's a blast, though!
...game's a blast, though!
Back when I played Dance Dance Revolution when I was in my teenage years, I remember that, upon selecting a trickier challenge setting, the announcer would sassily warn, "This mode is difficult!"
...anyway, this line plays in my brain whenever I'm about to go to a party or meet new people. Eek!
...anyway, this line plays in my brain whenever I'm about to go to a party or meet new people. Eek!
June 8, 2025 at 2:25 AM
Back when I played Dance Dance Revolution when I was in my teenage years, I remember that, upon selecting a trickier challenge setting, the announcer would sassily warn, "This mode is difficult!"
...anyway, this line plays in my brain whenever I'm about to go to a party or meet new people. Eek!
...anyway, this line plays in my brain whenever I'm about to go to a party or meet new people. Eek!
"Huh, I haven't had a silly cam-frolic in months – I should change that! Aw, but I don't see any of my saucy-pals online...okay, let's just hop into this random room! What could go wr-"
*n-slur within two seconds*
"...oh. Right."
*n-slur within two seconds*
"...oh. Right."
a woman in a judge 's robe says " earth is cancelled "
ALT: a woman in a judge 's robe says " earth is cancelled "
media.tenor.com
May 25, 2025 at 3:48 AM
"Huh, I haven't had a silly cam-frolic in months – I should change that! Aw, but I don't see any of my saucy-pals online...okay, let's just hop into this random room! What could go wr-"
*n-slur within two seconds*
"...oh. Right."
*n-slur within two seconds*
"...oh. Right."
Just ordered four cannoli from Mike's Pastry – anyone down to split them, Lady-and-the-Tramp style?
(I'm joking, I'm weird about sharing food; you can totally have your own!)
(I'm joking, I'm weird about sharing food; you can totally have your own!)
May 19, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Just ordered four cannoli from Mike's Pastry – anyone down to split them, Lady-and-the-Tramp style?
(I'm joking, I'm weird about sharing food; you can totally have your own!)
(I'm joking, I'm weird about sharing food; you can totally have your own!)
This Boston trip is *seriously* making me wish I had a travel partner, for all sorts of reasons. 🫤
May 18, 2025 at 6:00 PM
This Boston trip is *seriously* making me wish I had a travel partner, for all sorts of reasons. 🫤
...oh, this one'll be in my brain for a whiiiiiile.
Main Theme - Balatro
YouTube video by SiIvaGunner
youtu.be
April 22, 2025 at 1:59 AM
...oh, this one'll be in my brain for a whiiiiiile.
Memories of a Vegas trip with a bunch of friends back in 2013 – we decided that, should I open a club of any sort in the area, I'd definitely call it, "Butts 'n' Lasers," 'cause what else do you really need?
...anyway, one of said friends shared this rough sketch and I'm feeling the silly joy.
...anyway, one of said friends shared this rough sketch and I'm feeling the silly joy.
April 17, 2025 at 1:49 AM
Memories of a Vegas trip with a bunch of friends back in 2013 – we decided that, should I open a club of any sort in the area, I'd definitely call it, "Butts 'n' Lasers," 'cause what else do you really need?
...anyway, one of said friends shared this rough sketch and I'm feeling the silly joy.
...anyway, one of said friends shared this rough sketch and I'm feeling the silly joy.
Oh, neat, the forever-in-development-hell Masters of the Universe movie is actually well into production and slated for a June 2026 release! Ooh, sounds like fun! I'll...
...JARED LETO AS SKELETOR?!? I AM *OUT*
...JARED LETO AS SKELETOR?!? I AM *OUT*
April 11, 2025 at 10:06 PM
Oh, neat, the forever-in-development-hell Masters of the Universe movie is actually well into production and slated for a June 2026 release! Ooh, sounds like fun! I'll...
...JARED LETO AS SKELETOR?!? I AM *OUT*
...JARED LETO AS SKELETOR?!? I AM *OUT*
Rewatching The Expanse, and it doesn't *quite* hit the same as my initial watch due to the absence of my sassy internet-friend with whom I would trade unhinged thirst-comments about a couple characters. Uh. 😅
Still love it, though, and clinging to a renewed hope for Season 7!
Still love it, though, and clinging to a renewed hope for Season 7!
a woman in a black uniform has a badge on her chest that says ' rescue ' on it
Alt: In a scene from The Expanse, Klaes Ashford and Camina Drummer, the Executive Officer and Captain of a Belter ship, shout to rally their crew.
media.tenor.com
April 9, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Rewatching The Expanse, and it doesn't *quite* hit the same as my initial watch due to the absence of my sassy internet-friend with whom I would trade unhinged thirst-comments about a couple characters. Uh. 😅
Still love it, though, and clinging to a renewed hope for Season 7!
Still love it, though, and clinging to a renewed hope for Season 7!
Me: hmm, it's been a while – maybe I should investigate dating apps again and build a profile or somethin'! What's the harm in that? Might be fun!
Tom Cardy, saving me from a blunder:
youtu.be/77vmhSwDBds
Tom Cardy, saving me from a blunder:
youtu.be/77vmhSwDBds
Dating Apps (can Sit and Rotate)
YouTube video by Tom Cardy
youtu.be
March 20, 2025 at 2:43 AM
Me: hmm, it's been a while – maybe I should investigate dating apps again and build a profile or somethin'! What's the harm in that? Might be fun!
Tom Cardy, saving me from a blunder:
youtu.be/77vmhSwDBds
Tom Cardy, saving me from a blunder:
youtu.be/77vmhSwDBds
I've been rewatching the newer Star Trek series, and I wish we heard more casual shorthand in technobabble. For example, I broke out in giggles when the Bussard collectors were mentioned in Strange New Worlds, 'cause I love to pretend the crew colloquially refers to them as the Bussies.
a space ship is flying around a planet with a sun in the background
ALT: a space ship is flying around a planet with a sun in the background
media.tenor.com
February 16, 2025 at 3:15 AM
I've been rewatching the newer Star Trek series, and I wish we heard more casual shorthand in technobabble. For example, I broke out in giggles when the Bussard collectors were mentioned in Strange New Worlds, 'cause I love to pretend the crew colloquially refers to them as the Bussies.
Planning a Boston-frolic in mid-May – open to suggestions for recreational shenanigans! Planning for a few museum trips and a couple artistic endeavors, buuuuut curious about anything worth experiencing there!
February 10, 2025 at 4:54 AM
Planning a Boston-frolic in mid-May – open to suggestions for recreational shenanigans! Planning for a few museum trips and a couple artistic endeavors, buuuuut curious about anything worth experiencing there!
my ears went to hell
won't you join me there?
won't you join me there?
Just put Bloodborne Sex (one of my fav non-YT vids) on YT. Will be gradually gathering up my best non-YT stuff and putting it there for posterity. If you never saw some of it, it MIGHT feel like a slew of new content over an uncharacteristically short period of time!!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vE9G...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vE9G...
Bloodborne Sex
YouTube video by JerryTerry
www.youtube.com
February 3, 2025 at 2:19 AM
my ears went to hell
won't you join me there?
won't you join me there?
It's probably a side effect of my new medication but I have been the *sleepiest li'l guy* this past week and change, which is great 'cause it helps me briefly pretend recent goings-on have all been a gnarly nightmare. (Not to say that I haven't been engaging with it – just taking brain-breaks!)
January 22, 2025 at 4:19 PM
It's probably a side effect of my new medication but I have been the *sleepiest li'l guy* this past week and change, which is great 'cause it helps me briefly pretend recent goings-on have all been a gnarly nightmare. (Not to say that I haven't been engaging with it – just taking brain-breaks!)
Reposted by Pants, the Uromancer🧙♂️💦👖
The union IS calling for a boycott during this action.
Support striking workers!
Support striking workers!
We are on strike in FORTY-THREE states, including both the NYC and Seattle Roasteries🔥☕️🔥☕️🔥
🪧✊🪧✊🪧THE WORKERS UNITED WILL NEVER BE DIVIDED🪧✊🪧✊🪧
🪧✊🪧✊🪧THE WORKERS UNITED WILL NEVER BE DIVIDED🪧✊🪧✊🪧
December 29, 2024 at 5:17 PM
The union IS calling for a boycott during this action.
Support striking workers!
Support striking workers!
I've thoroughly dropped the ball on Pissmas festivities this year. 😭
...let's make up for it in the new year? 💛💦
...let's make up for it in the new year? 💛💦
December 24, 2024 at 5:05 AM
I've thoroughly dropped the ball on Pissmas festivities this year. 😭
...let's make up for it in the new year? 💛💦
...let's make up for it in the new year? 💛💦
Curious if, given the recent shift to this site in the SW community over the past month or so, there may have been a subsequent reassessment of platforms for those still on OnlyFans to move to a competing site (Fansly, LoyalFans, and the like). Or is OF just too established for many at this point?
November 29, 2024 at 5:44 AM
Curious if, given the recent shift to this site in the SW community over the past month or so, there may have been a subsequent reassessment of platforms for those still on OnlyFans to move to a competing site (Fansly, LoyalFans, and the like). Or is OF just too established for many at this point?
Oh! Hey, guess I should say...a thing. I'm going to attempt to be a bizarre li'l goofball over here instead! Seems far less headache-inducing than trying to sort through the deluge of nonsense, uh...*ELSEWHERE*, and I'm hoping that'll remain the case for the foreseeable future. Anyway, hi and such!
November 13, 2024 at 4:12 AM
Oh! Hey, guess I should say...a thing. I'm going to attempt to be a bizarre li'l goofball over here instead! Seems far less headache-inducing than trying to sort through the deluge of nonsense, uh...*ELSEWHERE*, and I'm hoping that'll remain the case for the foreseeable future. Anyway, hi and such!