The Name’s Nutz. Neil Nutz.
banner
colonelnutz.bsky.social
The Name’s Nutz. Neil Nutz.
@colonelnutz.bsky.social
“Fuck off” - Brian Clough, 1991

“Dad Joke Genius” - one of my children, 2025

“Annoying Tosspot” - the other child, 2025
Our Platoon
December 11, 2025 at 11:35 AM
Our Shaggy, D.A.
December 11, 2025 at 10:55 AM
World Darts starts tonight. Get that fooking tree up.

🔊
December 11, 2025 at 8:08 AM
Just shaved my head in the hotel bathroom. Forgot to bring shaving foam, so used the hotel issued hand and body wash on my head.
December 9, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Tyrrell’s???
December 7, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Iceberg
Iceberg
There’s an iceberg
Please just move the boat
So that we don’t hit that iceberg
December 7, 2025 at 8:39 PM
OH MY GOD! My Christmas squirrel Gary might end up with a friend!
December 7, 2025 at 6:23 PM
SIR Lando Norris?!?!
December 7, 2025 at 2:56 PM
If you see this, quote with your model of positive masculinity
December 5, 2025 at 7:10 PM
“Pitch the same shit to us. We can’t afford Romesh, though”
December 4, 2025 at 10:10 PM
I think my 14 year old son has turned into my 75 year old mum
December 4, 2025 at 8:38 AM
This is from Spa-Francorchamps
December 3, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Frau Nutz just told me that she don’t watch Morecambe ands Wise on Christmas Day because they’re “rubbish and creepy Dad Joke merchants”.
December 3, 2025 at 6:03 PM
2 Unlimited have let themselves go
December 3, 2025 at 8:09 AM
What I’m wearing to the Bluesky Christmas party:
December 2, 2025 at 8:04 PM
December 2, 2025 at 7:45 AM
Just had my Christmas leave extended, and now I only have a week and a half left before I have three and a bit weeks off.

GET THAT FOOKING TREE UP!
December 2, 2025 at 7:28 AM
Me, 2nd December, if I have one now:
December 1, 2025 at 9:49 AM
So the winner of this race wins a hand sanitizer dispenser… #f1fta @girlinthepitlane.bsky.social
November 30, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Two things about this:

1) how people are persisting with this scam in 2025 astounds me, I’m pretty sure this scam tactic outdates Covid
2) no chance it’s real anyway, no way do my kids “hope I’m well”. If they don’t open with “oi Dickhead!” or “go fuck yourself” I’m instantly suspicious
November 30, 2025 at 3:33 PM
This is if I lean back #bwfc
November 29, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Worra view #bwfc
November 29, 2025 at 1:45 PM
14 years. One that really hit hard. Bless his soul. #bwfc
November 27, 2025 at 11:17 AM
OH FUCK, I STILL HAVE THE ORIGINAL HAHAAAAAA
November 26, 2025 at 10:17 PM
I still have the stock Twitter reply man on my camera roll, as a tribute to McMoomins’ shtick relating to that.
November 26, 2025 at 10:14 PM