Boomer
@doubleboomer.bsky.social
Twitter refugee. That one Fitz guy.
Reposted by Boomer
Customer at work: "What are you doing working today!?! Nobody should be working on New Years Eve!"
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
December 31, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Customer at work: "What are you doing working today!?! Nobody should be working on New Years Eve!"
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Reposted by Boomer
Reposted by Boomer
Open up this picture fully.
Then look at the surface of Mars.
Then look up to the top right.
Spot Mars' moon Phobos high in the sky.
Then notice the bright spot beside Phobos.
That's Earth.
Then look at the surface of Mars.
Then look up to the top right.
Spot Mars' moon Phobos high in the sky.
Then notice the bright spot beside Phobos.
That's Earth.
December 30, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Open up this picture fully.
Then look at the surface of Mars.
Then look up to the top right.
Spot Mars' moon Phobos high in the sky.
Then notice the bright spot beside Phobos.
That's Earth.
Then look at the surface of Mars.
Then look up to the top right.
Spot Mars' moon Phobos high in the sky.
Then notice the bright spot beside Phobos.
That's Earth.
Customer at work: "What are you doing working today!?! Nobody should be working on New Years Eve!"
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
December 31, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Customer at work: "What are you doing working today!?! Nobody should be working on New Years Eve!"
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Me: "...But you're here?"
Customer: *surprised pikachu*
Customer: ...
Customer: ...
Customer: "...that's true."
Sometimes around 2006 while playing video games with a group of friends: "I hope a whore queefs in your cereal."
What's an insult you'll never forget?
December 27, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Sometimes around 2006 while playing video games with a group of friends: "I hope a whore queefs in your cereal."
This entire thread is gold
The Lord of The Rings movies were rated PG-13. By current rules that means that each film could contain one use of the word "Fuck". Which line are you altering to insert the most useful swear word?
"I can't carry it for you, but I can Fucking carry you"
"I can't carry it for you, but I can Fucking carry you"
December 27, 2025 at 2:12 AM
This entire thread is gold
Reposted by Boomer
The alt text is the christmas present you didn't know you wanted.
December 26, 2025 at 12:52 AM
The alt text is the christmas present you didn't know you wanted.
Reposted by Boomer
12YO girl signed up to do “stand up comedy” at the talent show. 13YO boy decided to heckle her. Teacher started to tell the boy to leave her alone, but the 12YO comedian said “no, no, let him go, this is the closest he’s ever going to get to having a conversation with a girl.”
What's an insult you'll never forget?
December 26, 2025 at 4:43 PM
12YO girl signed up to do “stand up comedy” at the talent show. 13YO boy decided to heckle her. Teacher started to tell the boy to leave her alone, but the 12YO comedian said “no, no, let him go, this is the closest he’s ever going to get to having a conversation with a girl.”
Every time I see the trailer for that God awful looking Warner Brothers movie I wonder what the fuck possessed them (Scientology) to make a movie out of the origin story for William H Macy's character from Mystery Men starring Tom Cruise for some unfathomable reason
December 20, 2025 at 3:50 AM
Every time I see the trailer for that God awful looking Warner Brothers movie I wonder what the fuck possessed them (Scientology) to make a movie out of the origin story for William H Macy's character from Mystery Men starring Tom Cruise for some unfathomable reason
I really should listen to more Doechii
December 18, 2025 at 5:38 AM
I really should listen to more Doechii
Shit my pants and bowl a 180
December 11, 2025 at 4:07 AM
Shit my pants and bowl a 180
My favorite thing to do during the holidays is attend a work bowling party immediately after shitting my pants
December 11, 2025 at 1:29 AM
My favorite thing to do during the holidays is attend a work bowling party immediately after shitting my pants
Is it some sort of literary requirement in adult fantasy novels that the 3rd or 4th book in a series will always contain an "oops I got captured by my enemies and sold into slavery" arc?
December 11, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Is it some sort of literary requirement in adult fantasy novels that the 3rd or 4th book in a series will always contain an "oops I got captured by my enemies and sold into slavery" arc?
So I have a new favorite genre of music that I didn't know existed
music.youtube.com/watch?v=DZpB...
music.youtube.com/watch?v=DZpB...
I'll Suck It So Hard You're Pullin' The Sheets Out Your Ass (feat. Rusty Hayfield)
YouTube video by Dürty Needlëz Presents - Topic
music.youtube.com
November 24, 2025 at 10:23 PM
So I have a new favorite genre of music that I didn't know existed
music.youtube.com/watch?v=DZpB...
music.youtube.com/watch?v=DZpB...
Fantasy writers, I am begging you, hire an editor versed in anachronisms. Why would a teenager in a sword-and-sorcery medieval setting know what a "montage" is? Have they encountered a time traveling Soviet filmmaker from the 1930's Earth Russia? Do wizards make moving pictures? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.
November 21, 2025 at 4:50 AM
Fantasy writers, I am begging you, hire an editor versed in anachronisms. Why would a teenager in a sword-and-sorcery medieval setting know what a "montage" is? Have they encountered a time traveling Soviet filmmaker from the 1930's Earth Russia? Do wizards make moving pictures? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.
Reposted by Boomer
When the librarian asks what I'm looking for
November 21, 2025 at 4:43 AM
When the librarian asks what I'm looking for
One big reason I haven't left Twitter yet is because sometimes you get to witness incredible things. Like Joyce Carol Oates casually eviscerating Elongated Muskrat with the casual boredom of a medical examiner dictating an autopsy.
November 12, 2025 at 5:02 AM
One big reason I haven't left Twitter yet is because sometimes you get to witness incredible things. Like Joyce Carol Oates casually eviscerating Elongated Muskrat with the casual boredom of a medical examiner dictating an autopsy.
Just had a weird moment where I suddenly understood an exhibit I saw at the Art Institute of Chicago 15 years ago in the modern art wing (I absolutely -hated- it at the time) and now I suddenly understand why people who like modern art hate people who don't.
November 8, 2025 at 10:52 PM
Just had a weird moment where I suddenly understood an exhibit I saw at the Art Institute of Chicago 15 years ago in the modern art wing (I absolutely -hated- it at the time) and now I suddenly understand why people who like modern art hate people who don't.
On one hand, congressional district lines should NOT be partisan in any way. On the other hand, gerrymandering by the GOP has led to a completely non-functional Congress and so, so much pain so fuck them. On the other-other hand, this will probably cause more Cuomo-style "Dems" so who the fuck knows
JUST IN: California has adopted Prop 50, the Democratic plan to redistrict the state, according to CNN.
They called it as soon as polls closed.
They called it as soon as polls closed.
November 5, 2025 at 6:40 AM
On one hand, congressional district lines should NOT be partisan in any way. On the other hand, gerrymandering by the GOP has led to a completely non-functional Congress and so, so much pain so fuck them. On the other-other hand, this will probably cause more Cuomo-style "Dems" so who the fuck knows
Thiiiiiiis. They will not change their mind. It is not your job to change their mind. Their entire existence is fear mongering on behalf of billionaires. The only attention they deserve is ridicule.
November 5, 2025 at 6:37 AM
Thiiiiiiis. They will not change their mind. It is not your job to change their mind. Their entire existence is fear mongering on behalf of billionaires. The only attention they deserve is ridicule.
Reposted by Boomer
Cheney was so evil that him dying actually lifted a curse
November 5, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Cheney was so evil that him dying actually lifted a curse
Reposted by Boomer
If you are a Democratic senator watching these results and the lesson you take is "I should cave and help Republicans reopen the government for nothing more than a promise written on toilet paper" then you shouldn't be in the Senate anymore
These big wins will embolden Dems to take on Trump's lawbreaking and show there's a price for GOP enabling of him. Folks hate to hear this, but normal patterns are asserting themselves: Liberalism isn't dead, Rs are likely to lose in 2026, and Trump is really unpopular, not a magical exception.
November 5, 2025 at 1:37 AM
If you are a Democratic senator watching these results and the lesson you take is "I should cave and help Republicans reopen the government for nothing more than a promise written on toilet paper" then you shouldn't be in the Senate anymore
Reposted by Boomer
Early reports from the front lines of right-wing media tonight are starting to trickle in. We’re being told “hoes mad”
November 5, 2025 at 2:40 AM
Early reports from the front lines of right-wing media tonight are starting to trickle in. We’re being told “hoes mad”
Reposted by Boomer
This is a threat
November 4, 2025 at 10:51 PM
This is a threat
Just had to help a customer wearing this exact wig and it nearly killed me
November 4, 2025 at 10:59 PM
Just had to help a customer wearing this exact wig and it nearly killed me