jeremy kaplowitz
@jeremykaplowitz.com
nyc "comedian"
plz follow @quorators.bsky.social ty
plz follow @quorators.bsky.social ty
was back on the Bad Hasbara podcast today to make fun of all the politicians tripping over each other to clap back at the pro Hamas chants in nyc this week youtu.be/9VD-Kiwdhlo
January 13, 2026 at 11:35 PM
was back on the Bad Hasbara podcast today to make fun of all the politicians tripping over each other to clap back at the pro Hamas chants in nyc this week youtu.be/9VD-Kiwdhlo
this is basically true if you consider that republicans were way less likely to get the covid vaccine
January 13, 2026 at 6:49 PM
this is basically true if you consider that republicans were way less likely to get the covid vaccine
not really sure what to do, but i just found out my landlord passed away. i live in this tower apartment that is technically on his property. really really hoping whoever takes over the house doesn't try to evict me
January 13, 2026 at 5:27 PM
not really sure what to do, but i just found out my landlord passed away. i live in this tower apartment that is technically on his property. really really hoping whoever takes over the house doesn't try to evict me
now i know every other moderate democrat in history ended up *not* being secretly good. but maybe this time...
January 13, 2026 at 12:57 AM
now i know every other moderate democrat in history ended up *not* being secretly good. but maybe this time...
think of how many lives would be saved if ICE stormtroopers had just seen a helpful training image such as this one
January 12, 2026 at 7:20 PM
think of how many lives would be saved if ICE stormtroopers had just seen a helpful training image such as this one
nyc has gone so woke they are making me look at an ad of a bear with a mountain up its ass!!!!
January 10, 2026 at 1:20 AM
nyc has gone so woke they are making me look at an ad of a bear with a mountain up its ass!!!!
it's crazy how there's never been a revolution in real life. only in Star Wars, somehow
January 8, 2026 at 6:03 PM
it's crazy how there's never been a revolution in real life. only in Star Wars, somehow
one of these Paul Schrader movies
January 7, 2026 at 12:35 AM
one of these Paul Schrader movies
rich people are like "if you don't want us to destroy movie theaters, you gotta put us in the movies!"
January 6, 2026 at 5:19 AM
rich people are like "if you don't want us to destroy movie theaters, you gotta put us in the movies!"
and Livenation (who owns Ticketmaster) is helping scalpers (because they make money from it) and they own a ton of venues in nyc now. i get that it's not as important as childcare and groceries, but it drives me NUTS
January 5, 2026 at 10:52 PM
and Livenation (who owns Ticketmaster) is helping scalpers (because they make money from it) and they own a ton of venues in nyc now. i get that it's not as important as childcare and groceries, but it drives me NUTS
not the most important issue in the world, but it is INSANE how bad concert tickets have gotten. $50 tickets scooped up by scalpers and sold for $500-$1000. it fucks over the fans, the bands, and the venue. but it makes a lot of money JUST for scalpers and ticketmaster. it really needs to be fixed!
January 5, 2026 at 10:48 PM
not the most important issue in the world, but it is INSANE how bad concert tickets have gotten. $50 tickets scooped up by scalpers and sold for $500-$1000. it fucks over the fans, the bands, and the venue. but it makes a lot of money JUST for scalpers and ticketmaster. it really needs to be fixed!
random joke i wrote several years ago
January 4, 2026 at 11:05 PM
random joke i wrote several years ago
standupshots are back, but instead of participating in this hot new instagram trend, i have printed out the ones i made when i was in college and destroyed them
January 2, 2026 at 10:00 PM
standupshots are back, but instead of participating in this hot new instagram trend, i have printed out the ones i made when i was in college and destroyed them
i'm fighting antisemitism with my new initiative "JewCoin"
January 2, 2026 at 8:17 PM
i'm fighting antisemitism with my new initiative "JewCoin"
numbers are looking good
January 1, 2026 at 11:03 PM
numbers are looking good
@bosh.worstpossible.world is back for the Quorators bonus episode this week, where we watch a "movie" about a witch who falls in love with a vampire or some shit. go listen/watch at patreon.com/quorators
January 1, 2026 at 7:50 PM
@bosh.worstpossible.world is back for the Quorators bonus episode this week, where we watch a "movie" about a witch who falls in love with a vampire or some shit. go listen/watch at patreon.com/quorators
it's so funny to me that Twin Peaks actors thought they could negotiate with Lynch like "you can't just write me off, I'm essential!" and then he'd just be like "whatever man, I'll just have your character turn into a desk lamp or some shit"
December 31, 2025 at 9:30 PM
it's so funny to me that Twin Peaks actors thought they could negotiate with Lynch like "you can't just write me off, I'm essential!" and then he'd just be like "whatever man, I'll just have your character turn into a desk lamp or some shit"
found a comic i drew in 2015 when i was in college and i STAND BY IT
December 29, 2025 at 10:46 PM
found a comic i drew in 2015 when i was in college and i STAND BY IT
i just think this is a good joke and im proud of it
December 27, 2025 at 6:14 PM
i just think this is a good joke and im proud of it
the Raytheon subreddit is nuts lol
December 26, 2025 at 11:00 PM
the Raytheon subreddit is nuts lol
testing ChatGPT's loyalty
December 26, 2025 at 9:28 PM
testing ChatGPT's loyalty
thank god 2026 is going to be a good year
December 26, 2025 at 5:44 AM
thank god 2026 is going to be a good year
"Walker" is a biopic about a guy from the 1850s that looks like this and it's a fucking masterpiece
December 23, 2025 at 5:42 PM
"Walker" is a biopic about a guy from the 1850s that looks like this and it's a fucking masterpiece
Say what you will about the ethics of AI, but we can actually use it to get around the Trump administration's censorship of the Jeffrey Epstein photos. I selected this black square and asked ChatGPT to fill in the blank. This is what it revealed to me:
December 21, 2025 at 6:08 AM
Say what you will about the ethics of AI, but we can actually use it to get around the Trump administration's censorship of the Jeffrey Epstein photos. I selected this black square and asked ChatGPT to fill in the blank. This is what it revealed to me: