Jonathan Teo
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jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Jonathan Teo
@jonathantoteo.bsky.social
59 followers 52 following 120 posts
Australian * Widow * Lover of Japan * Born on stolen Lenni Lenape Land * Live on stolen Woiworung Country * He/Him * 🏳️‍🌈

Interested in explowring how we grieve and how various groups, especially the LGBTQIA+ community, confront the concept of death.
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jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Jonathan Teo @jonathantoteo.bsky.social · Feb 1
In Oct '23, after 14 years together, my partner died unexpectedly. I've been grieving his loss for over a year now.

I still miss him everyday. But I am slowly moving forward, trying to create a new path for myself without him whilst honouring all he was to me.

Our 1st & last photos together ⬇️
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
theshovel.bsky.social
“Your behaviour shows the highest of contempt for all that our society holds sacred; it is morally reprehensible,” the judge told the two dozen podcasters inside Erin’s courtroom.

Read more: theshovel.com.au/2025/08/26/e...
December 26, 2025 at 11:40 PM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
He really is a bit of a perv! 😂 You better watch out!

#fatherchristmas #santaclaus #merrychristmas
Victorian looking image of two children looking out a window where Father Christmas is. The text reads, "He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He's already cut the phone lines. There really is no escape."
December 22, 2025 at 2:24 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
#grief #bereft #widowhood
Post from Whitney Hanson that reads "If your grief will not leave, gather it up and take it with you. Set an extra space for it at the table. Go for a walk and let it follow you like a shadow. Paint something and let some of it settle on the canvas. The key isn't to feel good all the time. It is to go on living alongside whatever you feel."
December 22, 2025 at 2:18 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Even after 2 years...

from the Pretty Painful Grief Book on Instagram.
Image with text that says, "It still hasn't sunk in. The reality of it all. The fact that, when someone dies, they never come back. You'll never hear their laugh again. You'll never see them smile again. You can't hug them just one more time or tell them you love them. They're just gone. Forever." Image with text that says, "Some days, I miss them. Some days, I miss who I was before I lost them. That's the grief no one talks about; the double loss. The person you loved and the version of you that existed before they left. And they both hurt." Image with text that says, "The hardest part isn't the funeral. It's not the anniversaries, or the birthdays, or even the holidays that come and go without them. Those days hurt - but at least you expect them to. The hardest part is the nothing moments. The ones that sneak up on you when you least expect it. Driving past their favourite coffee shop, seeing their handwriting tucked inside and old drawer, hearing a song you didn't realise would break you until it did, reaching for your phone before you remember. Grief isn't just one loss. It's a thousand tiny losses, every single day, and somehow, you have to find a way to survive. them all." Image with text that says, "Grief is full of contradictions. We know they're gone, yet some part of us still waits. We know we won't hear their voice again, yet we listen for it in the quiet. We know they won't walk through the door, yet we glance up ever time it opens. It's a strange kind of heartbreak - one that doesn't just hurt but disorients. One that makes the impossible feel possible for just a second. Because, how can someone so love, so deeply woven into our lives, just disappear? How can the world go on like nothing has changed when, for us, everything has?"
December 21, 2025 at 1:39 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
There is a fear you will lose them & all the ways they made you smile, made you feel good, impacted your life.

This is especially true for me when it feel sometimes like I'm the only one who talks about him, remembers him.

From @delicate.dusty_diary on Instagram.

#grief #bereft #widowhood
Image with text that says, "Grief is strange. When I lost them, I thought the fear of losing them was over. But it wasn't. Now I'm scared in different ways. Scared I'll forget their face, their little favourites, the way they laughed at their own jokes, the advice they slipped into conversations without me even asking, the kind of love only they knew how to give. I'm scared their voice will fade, the way they said my name will disappear, scared they'll turn burry in my memory until I can't reach them anymore. Because grief doesn't just take once. It keeps taking. Piece by piece."
December 17, 2025 at 2:54 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Not just 10 months on, but years later. It's been over 2 years now for me, and I still have trouble believing he's not here. I still wake up from time to time, expecting him to be around. Or, go to send him a meme I think he'll like and then realise he's dead.

#grief #bereft #widowhood
December 17, 2025 at 2:43 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
A true hero.
bgrueskin.bsky.social Bill Grueskin @bgrueskin.bsky.social · 12d
Ahmed al Ahmed, the man who tackled one of the Bondi killers, became an Australian citizen 3 years ago.

His deed was "his way of conveying his gratitude for staying in Australia, for being granted citizenship."

He took 5 bullets, and fears he'll lose his left arm.

www.smh.com.au/national/nsw...
December 15, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
justinwolfers.bsky.social
Just want to share with my American friends how the Australians respond to a shooting tragedy. Action, rather than thoughts and prayers.
December 15, 2025 at 4:09 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Heard this quote just now, and it struck me hard, but also brought me some comfort.

*photo is of our last Christmas together (2022)

#bereft #grief #widowhood
December 13, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
notonebit.com
Happy 100th birthday Dick Van Dyke!
a man in a hat is dancing in a crowd of people
ALT: a man in a hat is dancing in a crowd of people
media.tenor.com
December 13, 2025 at 5:09 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Short trip down the peninsula to Mornington.

Photos from Schnapper Point, Pt 1
Photo of a loan tree against a blue sky Photo of the water of Port Philip Bay and the blue sky above. Three small sail boats are on the water. Image of the water of Port Philip Bay with a blue sky above and scrub vegetation in the foreground. Photo of a rocky shore, waves of Port Philip Bay crashing against it, and the blue sky above.
December 7, 2025 at 2:40 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Source unknown.

#grief #bereft #widowhood #Imalive
Blurry image of fir trees in front of an orange and yellow sky with text that says “When people ask me ‘how is life’ nowadays, my mind goes blank. I don’t know. All I know is I’m alive.”
December 6, 2025 at 5:54 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
"I wish people would stop", Pt 2

From the Pretty Painful Griefbook on Instagram

#grief #bereft #widowhood #Iwishpeoplewouldstop
Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: comparing my grief to someone else's timeline." Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: telling me 'everything happens for a reason'." Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: offering advice when what I need is presence." Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: pretending grief is neat, tidy, and something you 'get over'."
December 5, 2025 at 3:18 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
"I wish people would stop", Pt 1

From the Pretty Painful Griefbook on Instagram

#grief #bereft #widowhood #Iwishpeoplewouldstop
Image with text that says "I wish people would stop: avoiding their name like saying it will break me." Image with text that says "I wish people would stop: expecting me to be the person I was before." Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: getting uncomfortable the second I tell the truth about how I'm really doing." Image with text that says, "I wish people would stop: acting like missing them is something I should grow out of."
December 5, 2025 at 3:16 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
This... so much this!

#cauliflower #fartvegetable #ick
Text that says "Cauliflower tastes like someone at a dozen hardboiled eggs, waited an hour, farted into the dirt, then tended that fart dirt lovingly for 2 months until it grew into a far flower, harvested it on the hottest, ripest day of the year, boiled it for 13 hours and then tried to fool people into thinking it tastes just like mashed potatoes."
November 30, 2025 at 7:46 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
All the time... sometimes I'm not sure where my brain is at.

Of course, it is still better than the time I couldn't find the sandwich press. And, then found it in the fridge.

It's a symptom of many things. But, it is also called "widow brain" in the widowhood community.

#widowbrain #grief
Meme of man looking at woman whilst holding his girlfriend's hand and his girlfriend looking disgusted. Text over the woman says "The fridge". Text over the man says "Me looking in the fridge for something". The text over the girlfriend says "The thing I'm looking for sitting on the benchtop"
November 28, 2025 at 12:15 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Stop avoiding your family member’s/friend’s grief.

They need to experience it & they need you to support them. And, sometimes, all that means is being there for them & allowing them to grieve.

#grief #bereft #widowhood
Image with the text, “The most vulnerable thing I can do is show you my pain. The most loving thing you can do is to not look away.”
November 27, 2025 at 3:37 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
Sometimes, things happen in life that have no meaning.

Trying to tell yourself that "everything happens for a reason" or something else toxically positive is not helpful.

Let yourself grieve.

#grief #bereft #widowhood #noreason #griefislove
Image with text that says, "Grief is a form of love - one that needs patience, not positivity. Toxic positivity wants to rush you into meaning-making. It tries to wrap your pain in silver linings before you've even had time to breathe, but grief doesn't need to be inspirational to be legitimate. It needs room. It needs slowness. It needs truth. The kindest thing you can do is let yourself feel what you feel without trying to turn it into something 'useful' too soon."
November 26, 2025 at 10:35 PM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
I will never get over his death. I will always talk about him, remember him, keep him close, even if it makes others uncomfortable.

(Image from the Pretty Painful Grief Book on Instagram)

#bereft #grief #widowhood #prettypainfulgriefbook
Image with text that says, "A belief about grief you'd love to erase -- If I have learned anything about grief, it's that my worth isn't measured by how 'over it' I seem. Healing isn't a performance, and grief isn't something you win by hiding it well enough to make everyone else comfortable. Just because I can smile, show up, and keep going doesn't mean the ache is gone. It just means I've learned how to carry it alongside everything else. I don't know how we go there, but the world loves to put timelines on grief - as if the sooner you're 'fine', the better. But being human doesn't work like that. Love leaves marks that don't fade, and loss reshapes us in ways that aren't meant to be invisible. My tears, my missing, my soft spots - they don't make me weak. They make me real. They're proof of a love that never ended."
November 25, 2025 at 2:04 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
You can't get over grief. You carry it with you because you carry the love you have/had for them with you, too.

(Image from rom the Pretty Painful Grief Book on Instagram)

#bereft #widowhood #grief #griefislove #loveisgrief
Image of a text that says "People talk about 'getting over it' like grief is some mountain you climb and leave behind. But the trust is: you don't get over love. And in that lies the reason you can't get over grief either. Because if you could forget that easily, if you could move on like nothing ever happened, maybe it was never really love at all. No, real love doesn't vanish when someone's gone. It lingers in the way you speak their name, in the memories that leak up on you, in the ache that lives quietly inside your chest. That ache isn't weakness. It isn't failure. It's proof. Proof that what you shared was real. Proof that they mattered. Proof that love doesn't end, even when life does."
November 25, 2025 at 1:57 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
My birthday, today, and I’m celebrating it alone because Julian, my love, is dead. And all the friends I had before his death have seemed to have forgotten or are avoiding me.

Apparently, I’m too “negative” because I won’t “move on” and “let him go”.

#widowhood #bereft #death #loneliness
November 22, 2025 at 12:07 AM
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
“In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death & taxes.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

This quote is only half right. There are plenty of examples in many modern day countries, including Ben’s America & my home of Australia, of individuals that avoid paying taxes.

1/4
November 19, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
eliaseells.bsky.social
I don’t know if I believe that’s true, but I know I’m who I am today because I knew you.
GIN & TONIC IS THE LEAST HARMFUL ALCOHOLIC DRINK, ACCORDING TO EXPERTS.-.
November 18, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
alisoncybe.bsky.social
The Salvation Army are a hate group. Do not forget that this winter.
November 17, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Reposted by Jonathan Teo
jonathantoteo.bsky.social
This.

#grief #bereft #letthembesad #feelawkward #pain #megandevine
September 4, 2025 at 9:22 PM