I'm either going to skip breakfast or go eat a breakfast burrito the size of my head. There's no in-between.

I don’t want to girl boss anymore. I want to spend 13 hours in Stardew Valley like a gremlin and ignore ✨everyone✨

Introducing the kids to the classics

her: do that thing I like

me: buys cheese

you're not supposed to ACTUALLY play games on the computer. video games on the computer are meant to be alt-tabbed out of and ignored while doing something else. have you people been PLAYING them???

Me: why am I feeling so shit and lethargic?

Me: *has been eating nothing but pizza and cookie pie all weekend and have drunk 0 water*

Me: so weird!

Word of this morning is ‘procaffeinate’: to put everything on hold until you’ve had sufficient amounts of coffee.

When the game you just bought goes on sale right afterwards