Please don’t even talk to me in the morning until I’ve had my coffee, 27 hours of alone time, several months by the seaside to ease my agonies, and many decades to wander the earth until the fabled blade of my ancestors can finally be reforged

Gonna say it was autism when I karate chop a Nazi.

Whenever I start to feel anxious I immediately have another coffee and scroll through the worst news imaginable on my phone and omg it does not help at all

if someone honks at me in traffic i pull up beside them crying with a gun to my head

i mean you gotta figure in this day and age, you know, with everything that’s been going on