Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
@tilskatoff.bsky.social
Head of a neurodivergent household. Ex-archaeologist. Now and again I paint things. Most of all, it's just nice to be nice.
It amazes me that the producers of stocking filler riddles still include this one like it's 1970 and the idea of a female surgeon is nothing short of scandalous.
December 28, 2025 at 9:15 PM
It amazes me that the producers of stocking filler riddles still include this one like it's 1970 and the idea of a female surgeon is nothing short of scandalous.
Dreamt I was ostracised at a wedding because I made the simple observation that the groom looked like a fat Bruce Grobbelaar.
Good to know that my sub conscious is rummaging through the 1980's Biffa bins of my memory bank for dream material.
Good to know that my sub conscious is rummaging through the 1980's Biffa bins of my memory bank for dream material.
December 27, 2025 at 11:06 AM
Dreamt I was ostracised at a wedding because I made the simple observation that the groom looked like a fat Bruce Grobbelaar.
Good to know that my sub conscious is rummaging through the 1980's Biffa bins of my memory bank for dream material.
Good to know that my sub conscious is rummaging through the 1980's Biffa bins of my memory bank for dream material.
Still kicking myself for incinerating the meat yesterday. I cooked it for nearly 2hrs longer than I should have because I based my timings on the price per kg amount rather than the actual weight
I could see it was looking blackened but my brain follows instructions to the letter. I'm such an idiot
I could see it was looking blackened but my brain follows instructions to the letter. I'm such an idiot
a person in blue gloves is holding a piece of meat on a cutting board .
Alt: a person in blue gloves is holding a piece of burnt meat on a cutting board .
media.tenor.com
December 26, 2025 at 11:34 AM
Still kicking myself for incinerating the meat yesterday. I cooked it for nearly 2hrs longer than I should have because I based my timings on the price per kg amount rather than the actual weight
I could see it was looking blackened but my brain follows instructions to the letter. I'm such an idiot
I could see it was looking blackened but my brain follows instructions to the letter. I'm such an idiot
This year's 'Call the Midwife' Christmas special looks a bit bleak.
December 22, 2025 at 5:56 PM
This year's 'Call the Midwife' Christmas special looks a bit bleak.
Clear evidence the Internet is rotting my brain. I went to the Ashmolean today and saw this lovely, ceramic head.
My brain gave me one thought and one thought only....
My brain gave me one thought and one thought only....
December 22, 2025 at 4:47 PM
Clear evidence the Internet is rotting my brain. I went to the Ashmolean today and saw this lovely, ceramic head.
My brain gave me one thought and one thought only....
My brain gave me one thought and one thought only....
Reposted by Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
You know when you're on a TV show and mean to say "Good for you for pushing the boat out" but you're nervous and fuck it up?...
December 16, 2025 at 7:11 PM
You know when you're on a TV show and mean to say "Good for you for pushing the boat out" but you're nervous and fuck it up?...
I often think along these lines and about how much money we could plough into making the world a better place if we didn't have to waste it defending ourselves from sabre-rattling, micro-penised, megalomaniac narcissists.
I absolutely love the argument that this is somehow due to European warmongering. When the Cold War was over, Europeans couldn't wait to destroy their militaries and if it weren't for Russian aggression, the entire EU put together would probably make like 7 tanks a year
December 15, 2025 at 7:00 PM
I often think along these lines and about how much money we could plough into making the world a better place if we didn't have to waste it defending ourselves from sabre-rattling, micro-penised, megalomaniac narcissists.
Anyone else hearing the 'Stath Let's Flats' theme tune?
December 14, 2025 at 7:32 AM
Anyone else hearing the 'Stath Let's Flats' theme tune?
Just had a mortifying full trolley re-scan of a massive food shop like a criminal
The reason? Despite taking these off the same display, scanning one+clicking there were 3 of them, one is apparently not the fucking same
Was that really necessary Sainsbury's? No is the answer, no it fucking wasn't
The reason? Despite taking these off the same display, scanning one+clicking there were 3 of them, one is apparently not the fucking same
Was that really necessary Sainsbury's? No is the answer, no it fucking wasn't
December 13, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Just had a mortifying full trolley re-scan of a massive food shop like a criminal
The reason? Despite taking these off the same display, scanning one+clicking there were 3 of them, one is apparently not the fucking same
Was that really necessary Sainsbury's? No is the answer, no it fucking wasn't
The reason? Despite taking these off the same display, scanning one+clicking there were 3 of them, one is apparently not the fucking same
Was that really necessary Sainsbury's? No is the answer, no it fucking wasn't
For anyone who is familiar with the 'Xero Accounting Software' ad on Spotify, do you think they intentionally recorded it to sound like they're saying "cunting software" every 5seconds?
December 13, 2025 at 6:25 PM
For anyone who is familiar with the 'Xero Accounting Software' ad on Spotify, do you think they intentionally recorded it to sound like they're saying "cunting software" every 5seconds?
You know you're winning at life when you've only got two Christmas cards on the mantelpiece....one is from your parents and the other is from your regular Chinese takeaway.
December 12, 2025 at 6:23 PM
You know you're winning at life when you've only got two Christmas cards on the mantelpiece....one is from your parents and the other is from your regular Chinese takeaway.
Don't threaten me with a good time.
December 10, 2025 at 12:37 PM
Don't threaten me with a good time.
As if the world isn't ridiculous enough at the moment, the fact that I'd be denied entry to the US and probably body-slammed into a detention facility for something like this is just nuts.
"Where have I seen that colour before?" I ask myself as I dunk another Biscoff and take a swig of tea?
December 10, 2025 at 9:58 AM
As if the world isn't ridiculous enough at the moment, the fact that I'd be denied entry to the US and probably body-slammed into a detention facility for something like this is just nuts.
Reposted by Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
The boys and girls of Clacton with some fantastic Reform-inspired Xmas card designs this year. 🎄
December 8, 2025 at 9:41 AM
The boys and girls of Clacton with some fantastic Reform-inspired Xmas card designs this year. 🎄
Our snoozing cat is currently the physical embodiment of how I feel about Monday's impending doom.
December 7, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Our snoozing cat is currently the physical embodiment of how I feel about Monday's impending doom.
Feel like I need a mental health break from 2025 and pop back to my favourite Christmas of 1984.
Even just a few hours playing with my 'Loving You' Barbie and Dad figuring out how to set up the ZX Spectrum so my brother and I could relentlessly play 'Horace Goes Skiing'. *Big sigh*
Even just a few hours playing with my 'Loving You' Barbie and Dad figuring out how to set up the ZX Spectrum so my brother and I could relentlessly play 'Horace Goes Skiing'. *Big sigh*
December 6, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Feel like I need a mental health break from 2025 and pop back to my favourite Christmas of 1984.
Even just a few hours playing with my 'Loving You' Barbie and Dad figuring out how to set up the ZX Spectrum so my brother and I could relentlessly play 'Horace Goes Skiing'. *Big sigh*
Even just a few hours playing with my 'Loving You' Barbie and Dad figuring out how to set up the ZX Spectrum so my brother and I could relentlessly play 'Horace Goes Skiing'. *Big sigh*
Looks like the end of days...or the rapture...or something happening over my town right now. Whichever event involves the appearance of a heavenly, cloud anus.
December 3, 2025 at 3:41 PM
Looks like the end of days...or the rapture...or something happening over my town right now. Whichever event involves the appearance of a heavenly, cloud anus.
Overheard a Year 7 in the corridor boasting to his mate that when the teacher said "Good morning" to him, he 'hilariously' responded with "BAD morning".
I instantly thought "Ha! It's mini Paul Darrow!" but unless you listen to @wheezingpod.bsky.social this will mean absolutely nothing to you.
I instantly thought "Ha! It's mini Paul Darrow!" but unless you listen to @wheezingpod.bsky.social this will mean absolutely nothing to you.
December 2, 2025 at 12:07 PM
Overheard a Year 7 in the corridor boasting to his mate that when the teacher said "Good morning" to him, he 'hilariously' responded with "BAD morning".
I instantly thought "Ha! It's mini Paul Darrow!" but unless you listen to @wheezingpod.bsky.social this will mean absolutely nothing to you.
I instantly thought "Ha! It's mini Paul Darrow!" but unless you listen to @wheezingpod.bsky.social this will mean absolutely nothing to you.
The expression of every future domestic robot when it's been ordered for the umpteenth time to wank off the husband whilst his wife pops to Sainsbury's.
December 1, 2025 at 11:00 AM
The expression of every future domestic robot when it's been ordered for the umpteenth time to wank off the husband whilst his wife pops to Sainsbury's.
I keep hearing a George Michael song+I sing along to it happily but have never known which song it is.
Apparently, it's 'Father Figure'. Reason I didn't know this is because I've been singing "I will be your bottom feeder" and never even questioned it.
Apparently, it's 'Father Figure'. Reason I didn't know this is because I've been singing "I will be your bottom feeder" and never even questioned it.
November 30, 2025 at 12:33 PM
I keep hearing a George Michael song+I sing along to it happily but have never known which song it is.
Apparently, it's 'Father Figure'. Reason I didn't know this is because I've been singing "I will be your bottom feeder" and never even questioned it.
Apparently, it's 'Father Figure'. Reason I didn't know this is because I've been singing "I will be your bottom feeder" and never even questioned it.
I need to put mascara on to go out but I keep crying at videos of military horses knowing to be gentle with disabled people and people with special needs.
No, *you're* stressed and hormonal.
No, *you're* stressed and hormonal.
November 29, 2025 at 7:41 PM
I need to put mascara on to go out but I keep crying at videos of military horses knowing to be gentle with disabled people and people with special needs.
No, *you're* stressed and hormonal.
No, *you're* stressed and hormonal.
This year, we have retired our old and tattered Christmas tree and invested in a posh new one.
It comes with silky gloves to put it up with and I don't think I've ever felt so fancy.
It comes with silky gloves to put it up with and I don't think I've ever felt so fancy.
November 29, 2025 at 1:20 PM
This year, we have retired our old and tattered Christmas tree and invested in a posh new one.
It comes with silky gloves to put it up with and I don't think I've ever felt so fancy.
It comes with silky gloves to put it up with and I don't think I've ever felt so fancy.
With 'Stranger Things' being everywhere right now, it reminded me that 3yrs ago, my then 11yo son got mobbed by a group of teenage girls who genuinely thought he was the actor who played Will Byers.
Felt like it was a bit of a kick in the teeth for my amateur mum hairdressing skills.
Felt like it was a bit of a kick in the teeth for my amateur mum hairdressing skills.
November 29, 2025 at 12:26 PM
With 'Stranger Things' being everywhere right now, it reminded me that 3yrs ago, my then 11yo son got mobbed by a group of teenage girls who genuinely thought he was the actor who played Will Byers.
Felt like it was a bit of a kick in the teeth for my amateur mum hairdressing skills.
Felt like it was a bit of a kick in the teeth for my amateur mum hairdressing skills.