Toft
@toft.bsky.social
I like: sci-fi, gameshow comedy, memes, robots, queers. She/her.
We are having a birthday party for #hw tomorrow (his first ever, I've been spared this long) at the hellish bouncy inflateables place and I'm dreading it
December 13, 2025 at 6:50 PM
We are having a birthday party for #hw tomorrow (his first ever, I've been spared this long) at the hellish bouncy inflateables place and I'm dreading it
On my way back home after spending a few days with my dad and my stepmum who has ????dementia. They're doing okay, all things considered, but I'm very glad to be going home.
December 11, 2025 at 3:04 PM
On my way back home after spending a few days with my dad and my stepmum who has ????dementia. They're doing okay, all things considered, but I'm very glad to be going home.
Ha. Yeah.
Due to extraordinary demand, tickets to the Taskmaster Live On Stage US Tour sold out in just 13 minutes yesterday.
We are very sorry if you missed out on tickets. We will be back in the US soon for more shows, so join our mailing list to stay up to date.
taskmaster.tv/taskmaster-l...
(1/2)
We are very sorry if you missed out on tickets. We will be back in the US soon for more shows, so join our mailing list to stay up to date.
taskmaster.tv/taskmaster-l...
(1/2)
December 9, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Ha. Yeah.
I love late nineteenth century sensational fiction. I'm reading the Wilkie Collins novella The Dream Woman and it's SO STUPID.
December 9, 2025 at 3:37 PM
I love late nineteenth century sensational fiction. I'm reading the Wilkie Collins novella The Dream Woman and it's SO STUPID.
I've been struggling to read all semester and after taking all the social media apps off my phone for airport security, I read 1.5 novels. I might... leave them off, and see if I can feel connected enough to my friends & community with whatsapp and check-ins on my laptop.
December 9, 2025 at 12:45 PM
I've been struggling to read all semester and after taking all the social media apps off my phone for airport security, I read 1.5 novels. I might... leave them off, and see if I can feel connected enough to my friends & community with whatsapp and check-ins on my laptop.
Reposted by Toft
actually, someone (me) should write a fic where don cherry DOES exist in the heated rivalry universe
and then tag it with "period typical homophobia"
and then tag it with "period typical homophobia"
December 9, 2025 at 6:16 AM
actually, someone (me) should write a fic where don cherry DOES exist in the heated rivalry universe
and then tag it with "period typical homophobia"
and then tag it with "period typical homophobia"
I'm at my dad's. He's very capable and my stepmum doesn't like anyone else working in the kitchen but I suggested I make them dinner and it went almost without a hitch, thank goodness. Tandoori chicken and apple crumble.
December 8, 2025 at 9:11 PM
I'm at my dad's. He's very capable and my stepmum doesn't like anyone else working in the kitchen but I suggested I make them dinner and it went almost without a hitch, thank goodness. Tandoori chicken and apple crumble.
I'm now seeing that the tickets went on sale an hour before the email went out?! not sure if that was a secret or an accident. Anyway they may not have actually sold out in 3min.
Wellll it looks like the taskmaster live tickets at Boston sold out in under 3min.
December 8, 2025 at 4:37 PM
I'm now seeing that the tickets went on sale an hour before the email went out?! not sure if that was a secret or an accident. Anyway they may not have actually sold out in 3min.
Wellll it looks like the taskmaster live tickets at Boston sold out in under 3min.
December 8, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Wellll it looks like the taskmaster live tickets at Boston sold out in under 3min.
And I have asked to be
where no storms come
where the green swell is in the havens dumb
and out of the swing of the sea.
where no storms come
where the green swell is in the havens dumb
and out of the swing of the sea.
Which lines of poetry live rent-free in your head?
December 7, 2025 at 4:08 PM
And I have asked to be
where no storms come
where the green swell is in the havens dumb
and out of the swing of the sea.
where no storms come
where the green swell is in the havens dumb
and out of the swing of the sea.
#hw had his first ice skating lesson today! Absolute chaos, forty kids on the ice falling over constantly, but by the end he was popping back up very easily from falls, and he didn't give up or get frustrated. So proud of him.
December 6, 2025 at 5:41 PM
#hw had his first ice skating lesson today! Absolute chaos, forty kids on the ice falling over constantly, but by the end he was popping back up very easily from falls, and he didn't give up or get frustrated. So proud of him.
The idea of Trump winning the (newly developed??) "FIFA Peace Prize" is HILARIOUS given how openly corrupt and pro-fascist FIFA is - they love money and power. That's it. They don't even love football.
December 5, 2025 at 7:37 PM
The idea of Trump winning the (newly developed??) "FIFA Peace Prize" is HILARIOUS given how openly corrupt and pro-fascist FIFA is - they love money and power. That's it. They don't even love football.
Reposted by Toft
wtf is a FIFA peace prize? that's like being an NFL laureate in physics
December 5, 2025 at 7:21 PM
wtf is a FIFA peace prize? that's like being an NFL laureate in physics
This perfect fucking student, she brought a brownie into my office on a plate and I was like, internally, man I could go for a brownie, and then THE BROWNIE WAS FOR ME.
December 4, 2025 at 8:12 PM
This perfect fucking student, she brought a brownie into my office on a plate and I was like, internally, man I could go for a brownie, and then THE BROWNIE WAS FOR ME.
Please witness me, I renewed the prescription
I had two lovely meetings with lovely students today and now I have to go OUT to renew a prescription, what the fuck
December 4, 2025 at 8:10 PM
Please witness me, I renewed the prescription
I had two lovely meetings with lovely students today and now I have to go OUT to renew a prescription, what the fuck
December 4, 2025 at 7:34 PM
I had two lovely meetings with lovely students today and now I have to go OUT to renew a prescription, what the fuck
THEY'RE COMING TO BOSTON WHAT
XXL NEWS! Greg and Alex are coming to America in January 2026 to spread the word of the Taskmaster.
Shows in Chicago, Boston, Philadelphia, Washington D.C. and New York! Sign up to the mailing list for pre-sale access.
taskmaster.tv/taskmaster-l...
Shows in Chicago, Boston, Philadelphia, Washington D.C. and New York! Sign up to the mailing list for pre-sale access.
taskmaster.tv/taskmaster-l...
December 4, 2025 at 7:27 PM
THEY'RE COMING TO BOSTON WHAT
In 'the kids are alright (in at least some ways)' news, which I feel like is very lacking these days, #hw wears dresses to school sometimes and this has not raised - as far as I can tell - a single hostile comment or raised eyebrow among his fellow kindergarteners or teacher.
December 3, 2025 at 7:46 PM
In 'the kids are alright (in at least some ways)' news, which I feel like is very lacking these days, #hw wears dresses to school sometimes and this has not raised - as far as I can tell - a single hostile comment or raised eyebrow among his fellow kindergarteners or teacher.
#hw absolutely destroyed his shoes in under 2 months. I guess he needs more robust ones. He was in tears this morning asking me to "take them to the cobbler." I put duct tape on them. Poor bunny, he never cries usually; I think he's very worn down. Kindergarten is hard work.
December 3, 2025 at 3:37 PM
#hw absolutely destroyed his shoes in under 2 months. I guess he needs more robust ones. He was in tears this morning asking me to "take them to the cobbler." I put duct tape on them. Poor bunny, he never cries usually; I think he's very worn down. Kindergarten is hard work.
John Robins, my precious boy, what are you wearing
Champion of Champions IV arrives on Monday 22nd December on Channel 4 and YouTube.
AND a double New Year Treat will air back-to-back on Friday 2nd and Saturday 3rd January, featuring Big Zuu, Jill Scott, Sam Ryder, Susie Dent and Rose Ayling-Ellis, all vying for new year glory.
AND a double New Year Treat will air back-to-back on Friday 2nd and Saturday 3rd January, featuring Big Zuu, Jill Scott, Sam Ryder, Susie Dent and Rose Ayling-Ellis, all vying for new year glory.
December 3, 2025 at 3:35 PM
John Robins, my precious boy, what are you wearing
Not my Bon, not my Jovi
Not my lady, not my peace. #CanCon
Not my guns, not my roses.
December 3, 2025 at 12:47 PM
Not my Bon, not my Jovi
Reposted by Toft
Royal Mail have written a GDPR policy for their letter to Santa scheme that is a) pitched at children explaining how their data is used and b) fully committed to the existence of Father Christmas and it’s just… really cute
December 2, 2025 at 10:12 PM
Royal Mail have written a GDPR policy for their letter to Santa scheme that is a) pitched at children explaining how their data is used and b) fully committed to the existence of Father Christmas and it’s just… really cute
Holy shit, I just realized that Audrey Nuna, who did the voice for Mira in KPop Demon Hunters, is the same singer who did Comic Sans, which I love???? That is RANGE.
December 2, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Holy shit, I just realized that Audrey Nuna, who did the voice for Mira in KPop Demon Hunters, is the same singer who did Comic Sans, which I love???? That is RANGE.
So today I went down a rabbit hole about the Star Trek filker and folk singer Leslie Fish, and WOW she had an idiosyncratic set of political opinions.
December 2, 2025 at 5:54 PM
So today I went down a rabbit hole about the Star Trek filker and folk singer Leslie Fish, and WOW she had an idiosyncratic set of political opinions.
Reposted by Toft
ODYSSEUS: wife I am home after 20 years
PENELOPE: oh shit I mean honey you are home how wonderful
ODYSSEUS: who are all these strange men
PENELOPE: well, I'll tell you what they're definitely not, which is a 300 person polycule ruling in your absence
PENELOPE: oh shit I mean honey you are home how wonderful
ODYSSEUS: who are all these strange men
PENELOPE: well, I'll tell you what they're definitely not, which is a 300 person polycule ruling in your absence
December 2, 2025 at 8:28 AM
ODYSSEUS: wife I am home after 20 years
PENELOPE: oh shit I mean honey you are home how wonderful
ODYSSEUS: who are all these strange men
PENELOPE: well, I'll tell you what they're definitely not, which is a 300 person polycule ruling in your absence
PENELOPE: oh shit I mean honey you are home how wonderful
ODYSSEUS: who are all these strange men
PENELOPE: well, I'll tell you what they're definitely not, which is a 300 person polycule ruling in your absence