Alicia Kraft
@aliciakraft.bsky.social
contributor at The Onion
fatty at large (get it?)
✶✶Chicago✶✶
fatty at large (get it?)
✶✶Chicago✶✶
Pinned
Alicia Kraft
@aliciakraft.bsky.social
· May 27
Kinda BS that nobody cares if I call myself a "cat mom" but they act weird when I call myself a "cat MILF"
Reposted by Alicia Kraft
Everybody at the airport always flips the fuck out about my "I have a bomb" neck tattoo even though I have a doctor's note
November 24, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Everybody at the airport always flips the fuck out about my "I have a bomb" neck tattoo even though I have a doctor's note
Everybody at the airport always flips the fuck out about my "I have a bomb" neck tattoo even though I have a doctor's note
November 24, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Everybody at the airport always flips the fuck out about my "I have a bomb" neck tattoo even though I have a doctor's note
thinking about him again
November 24, 2025 at 3:50 AM
thinking about him again
Farted next to a sleeping Steve and he startled awake, put his hand on my butt and said (sincerely) "what?? Are you ok???"
November 23, 2025 at 5:22 AM
Farted next to a sleeping Steve and he startled awake, put his hand on my butt and said (sincerely) "what?? Are you ok???"
It feels like it should be easier to find Stargate Glory Hole* porn
*the Stargate is the glory hole
*the Stargate is the glory hole
November 21, 2025 at 7:53 PM
It feels like it should be easier to find Stargate Glory Hole* porn
*the Stargate is the glory hole
*the Stargate is the glory hole
Doctor, shaking his head grimly while taking off his stethoscope: "It's just as I feared. Lub-dub."
November 21, 2025 at 7:47 PM
Doctor, shaking his head grimly while taking off his stethoscope: "It's just as I feared. Lub-dub."
Drain the Wok Johnson
November 21, 2025 at 5:15 AM
Drain the Wok Johnson
Getting nasty with a Danish mummy, straight up boggystyle
November 20, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Getting nasty with a Danish mummy, straight up boggystyle
My favorite berry? It's gotta be very.
November 20, 2025 at 8:00 PM
My favorite berry? It's gotta be very.
AI cannot and will not replace human art
November 20, 2025 at 6:12 PM
AI cannot and will not replace human art
I wish I could invest in cortisol because that shit is going nowhere but up up up
November 20, 2025 at 7:23 AM
I wish I could invest in cortisol because that shit is going nowhere but up up up
Reposted by Alicia Kraft
Do you want to view
✖️ Men
✖️ Women
✖️ Couples
✅ Tom Bombadil
tomdabomb: hey guys
tomdabomb: almost at goal
Hornystud: boots
LuvrBoi: show boots
irl12inch: yellow boots NOW
tomdabomb: ok singing goal reached
tomdabomb: this one is called "the river-daughter"
Hornystud: NO
irl12inch: NO
MisterCocks: NO
✖️ Men
✖️ Women
✖️ Couples
✅ Tom Bombadil
tomdabomb: hey guys
tomdabomb: almost at goal
Hornystud: boots
LuvrBoi: show boots
irl12inch: yellow boots NOW
tomdabomb: ok singing goal reached
tomdabomb: this one is called "the river-daughter"
Hornystud: NO
irl12inch: NO
MisterCocks: NO
November 19, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Do you want to view
✖️ Men
✖️ Women
✖️ Couples
✅ Tom Bombadil
tomdabomb: hey guys
tomdabomb: almost at goal
Hornystud: boots
LuvrBoi: show boots
irl12inch: yellow boots NOW
tomdabomb: ok singing goal reached
tomdabomb: this one is called "the river-daughter"
Hornystud: NO
irl12inch: NO
MisterCocks: NO
✖️ Men
✖️ Women
✖️ Couples
✅ Tom Bombadil
tomdabomb: hey guys
tomdabomb: almost at goal
Hornystud: boots
LuvrBoi: show boots
irl12inch: yellow boots NOW
tomdabomb: ok singing goal reached
tomdabomb: this one is called "the river-daughter"
Hornystud: NO
irl12inch: NO
MisterCocks: NO
Hershey's Special Dork
November 17, 2025 at 11:06 PM
Hershey's Special Dork
Can you imagine having editors that hate you this much
November 17, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Can you imagine having editors that hate you this much
What a great joke
Farmers’ Almanac Ceases Publication https://theonion.com/farmers-almanac-ceases-publication/
November 15, 2025 at 9:50 PM
What a great joke
If you own a cat long enough you might be blessed to witness a live action Tom and Jerry cartoon starring your idiot cat getting his ass handed to him by a mouse that's been training its whole life for this
November 14, 2025 at 1:04 AM
If you own a cat long enough you might be blessed to witness a live action Tom and Jerry cartoon starring your idiot cat getting his ass handed to him by a mouse that's been training its whole life for this
I think it's really nice that Mario, Bowser, et al can take a break from trying to kill each other to play a friendly game of tennis or golf
November 13, 2025 at 7:47 PM
I think it's really nice that Mario, Bowser, et al can take a break from trying to kill each other to play a friendly game of tennis or golf
FUCKIN EXACTLY
Well, it's a little clearer now why billionaires are so invested in technology that produces better written emails.
November 13, 2025 at 5:06 PM
FUCKIN EXACTLY
Reposted by Alicia Kraft
Reposted by Alicia Kraft
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
November 9, 2025 at 3:10 PM
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
Youth: "And why shall I play upon the clavichord, maestro, if I might bid the A.I. play for me?"
--A Clavichord Teacher's Nightmare!
--A Clavichord Teacher's Nightmare!
November 10, 2025 at 5:15 AM
Youth: "And why shall I play upon the clavichord, maestro, if I might bid the A.I. play for me?"
--A Clavichord Teacher's Nightmare!
--A Clavichord Teacher's Nightmare!
Some fat (snow)flakes out there. You know what that means. it's Hunkerin Time
November 10, 2025 at 3:45 AM
Some fat (snow)flakes out there. You know what that means. it's Hunkerin Time
My OS updated and it changed inconsequential things about its appearance!! FUCK!!!!!
November 8, 2025 at 11:25 PM
My OS updated and it changed inconsequential things about its appearance!! FUCK!!!!!