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Jeph the Giant Ginge

@bigjeph.bsky.social

510 followers 970 following 1.4K posts

Father. Discontent Creator. Recovering Comedy Writer. First Man to Summit Everest in a Bathysphere. Autistic, but not in the "profitable in Vegas" way. I am the Brute Squad.

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 27m

After this much time having to do it, it's nice to get back to not praising anything about p*rtland.

I may never forgive this regime for taking away my beloved sportshate.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 4h

Santa Cruz has some merits to it, but I think Lansing wins on the back of Nerd Row, whatever the hell Horrocks is, and the post-apocalyptic wasteland of Frandor, where the strong are afraid, and the weak are killed and eaten.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 5h

Up to 102, right? Haven't been through to check the scoreboard in a few.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 6h

First off, Third Place exists.

Secondly, the weirdness contest depends on how you measure it. Portland is the most overtly and visibly weird. Scratch Seattle's surface, and its depth of weirdness is unmatched.

As far as Weirdness Density goes, neither one even remotely compares to Lansing, MI.

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 7h

So proud of my people.

John @juanvaldes.bsky.social · 8h

👋 @timothywood.bsky.social

Anti-Fascist Anti-Racist Always Seattle flag in the No Kings rally.

Reposted by Jeph the Giant Ginge

Barred and Boujee aka Madiba Dennie @audrelawdamercy.bsky.social · 10h

Amazing sign being held by a small child

Child-drawn sign reading DONT MAKE me GO to LAW SCHOOL

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 8h

They literally reignited the death match between Seattle and Portland over who can be weirder.

*Fremont and South Ballard enter the chat*

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 9h

And if it can help you raise that number, this permanent 2L will gladly help with para work, getting coffee, guarding the office, or goon violence.

(Okay, not that last one. I was running out of things I'm good at.)

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 9h

If there weren't tons of blue in "red" states, they wouldn't need to gerrymander.

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 10h

Most Icers seem to be Xers or Elder Millennials.

You watched Star Wars and grew up to be a Stormtrooper,
You read X-Men and support Registration Acts,
You saw Harry Potter and dreamt of death eating,
You read Hunger Games and want another term for Snow,

You missed the fucking point.

A lot.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 10h

Beliefs, Cooperation, Violence in Defense.

An image of Godzilla and King Kong in fighting poses.

The caption reads "No Kings but Kong, No Gods but Godzilla"

A picture of wrestler John Cena looking perplexed, with the caption "realizing that they only call it class warfare if you dare to fight back"

Detail of a T Shirt reading "RKO Everybody"

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 10h

Mom took Tylenol when she was pregnant with me, and all I got was a sense of empathy.

And Autism.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 2d

katu.com/news/local/p...

This is nonsensical.

If they had charged her with noise pollution, or Assault with a reedy weapon, I would understand.

But this reads as if the charge is "assaulting an officer's fist with your face".

Portland clarinet player charged with alleged assault on federal officer near ICE office

A Portland clarinetist, Oriana Korol, 38, appeared in federal court today after being charged with assaulting a federal officer near the Portland ICE building.

katu.com

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 10d

I feel as though we're in danger of losing track of the constant stream of stupid and failure from this regime.

These weaklings lost a fight to Jimmy Kimmel. You know, the comedian for people who say "Waiter, this ice cream is too spicy. This isn't that -French- Vanilla, is it?"

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 12d

But Generalissimo Francisco Franco is okay, right?

(Yes, all my cultural references are 50 years old)

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 12d

True fact: more members of Hitler's family have served in the US military than Trump's.

And beyond just Wharton. I'm convinced that he failed his APGAR test.

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Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 12d

Really easy to make these assertions when it's the poor kids dying, eh, Donny Deferment?

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 12d

Reality is a delightfully stupid place. What are some truly stupid moments worth a giggle? I'll start:

USAF trained bats to firebomb buildings, but when tested, they kept returning to the bomb Bay.

Two words: 4 Seasons.

Guy once sued Satan, had it dismissed due to impossibility of serving notice.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 13d

Charles kidnapped a traumatized orphan, brainwashed him to believe in lockstep with an enforced father figure, trained him like a child soldier to fight in his bloody mutant civil war...

And we're supposed to be surprised that Cyclops turns out to be a little off-kilter?

Minovsky @minovskyarticle.bsky.social · Aug 26

Uncanny X-Men #178: Cyclops mails Xavier a post-coital honeymoon photo like it's the most normal thing in the world.

Professor X holding up a photo of Scott Summers and Madelyne Pryor in a heart shaped honeymoon suite bed.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 14d

Loudspeakerdude is a hero.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 14d

Pretty sure that Ozzie is -still- dekeing people on that goal.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 14d

Do you know how absolutely unhinged someone has to be in order to rank as "oddest person in Tulwila"?

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 17d

There goes my chances of getting an official state visit to Istanbul.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 17d

No Gods but Zilla.

No Kings but Kong.

Jeph the Giant Ginge @bigjeph.bsky.social · 18d

Petanistes, in late night?

It's more likely than you think..