Christian Polanco
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chrispolanco.com
Christian Polanco
@chrispolanco.com
1.2K followers 160 following 270 posts
Stand-up Comedian
⚽️: @soccercooligans.com
Posts Replies Media Videos
Reposted by Christian Polanco
joshgondelman.bsky.social
"It wasn't murder, and if you say it was murder we will kill you, which again will not be murder."
atrupar.com Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d
Homan: "We gotta stop the hateful rhetoric. Saying this officer is a murderer is dangerous. It's just ridiculous. It's gonna infuriate people more which means there's gonna be more incidents like this."
January 11, 2026 at 5:04 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
Sending lots of love to the Twin Cities and all of Minnesota right now. A place that has been so incredibly welcoming to us, by some of the kindest people on Earth. The soccer community in MN is like no other, and we stand in solidarity with all the people pushing back on this immense cruelty. ❤️
January 9, 2026 at 3:04 AM
chrispolanco.com
this is what a dictatorship looks like
nbcnews.com NBC News @nbcnews.com · 5d
A Minneapolis driver was shot and killed by ICE officer during immigration-related operation.
DHS says it was a "vehicle ramming related" incident.

Mayor Jacob Frey says it did not appear that the vehicle was being weaponized against the agent. nbcnews.to/4qI7AiA
January 7, 2026 at 10:28 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
dieworkwear.bsky.social
amazing how the entire machine can pivot within 24 hours. no need to slowly upsell the argument; just issue new marching orders
Matt Walsh tweeted last year: "We've spent the last 25 years bringing "freedom" and "democracy" to countries around the globe while our own country has been systematically invaded and now our largest cities are run by foreigners and communists. If you want to know why I'm so avowedly non-interventionist, this is why." Then he tweeted today: ""This is a war for oil!!!!!" First of all, the "war" lasted like 90 minutes. Second, going to war to secure vital resources for your own people is totally legitimate. Why should we allow some third world communist shithole to control trillions of dollars worth of oil?" Laura Loomer tweeted last year: "I’m America First, I don’t support “Regime Change”. I went on @Bannons_WarRoom to talk about Chinese aggression in Venezuela and why we need to designate the Muslim Brotherhood as a foreign Islamic terrorist organization." Then she tweeted yesterday: "Maduro has arrived at the DEA office in Manhattan. He was transported in an armored motorcade after being transported in a blindfold via helicopter & then by plane to New York after his compound in Caracas was raided by US Special Forces. Proud to be an American today! USA 🇺🇸" Catturd tweeted last year: "Name one U.S. inspired regime change that hasn’t ended in absolute disaster." Then he tweeted yesterday: "Venezuela is now more free than New York City." Will Chamberlain tweeted last year: "The Republican Party is no longer the party of regime change and endless wars If you want to be its standard-bearer that is a non-negotiable position" Then he tweeted yesterday: "I can think of few better uses of my tax dollars than black-bagging the head of a foreign narco-trafficking organization that enriches itself by addicting and poisoning my fellow Americans"
January 5, 2026 at 6:50 AM
chrispolanco.com
Fun fact about me. When I was in junior high school, I went on a field trip to the prison where Nicolas Maduro is being detained.
January 4, 2026 at 4:06 AM
chrispolanco.com
Not sure about you guys, but I expect a little bit more of the inaugural FIFA Peace Prize award winner than attacking a sovereign country in the middle of the night and kidnapping its sitting president. That’s just me tho.
January 3, 2026 at 4:23 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
Yes we obviously asked Mayor @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social to create an NYC Soccer Czar position in his administration because we know two incredible candidates for the role. ⚽️🤴🏽🤴🏻
January 2, 2026 at 4:46 AM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
If Scott Jennings has no haters, we are dead. 😅

The Black List founder @franklinleonard.bsky.social on what it's like joining the panel on CNN.
December 26, 2025 at 11:26 PM
chrispolanco.com
ayo Santa, this is not what I wanted for Christmas! 😭 #NYCFC
tombogert.bsky.social Tom Bogert @tombogert.bsky.social · 19d
🇺🇸 BREAKING: The LA Galaxy are finalizing a deal to sign free agent center back Justin Haak, per sources.

Haak, 24, was one of the marquee free agents. Had a breakout 2025 season.

Galaxy now reload with Haak and Jakob Glesnes. Big winter.

www.nytimes.com/athletic/691...
LA Galaxy continue defensive makeover with move for NYCFC’s Justin Haak: Sources
The Galaxy are continuing their offseason resurgence after a title defense that went horribly wrong
www.nytimes.com
December 24, 2025 at 7:09 PM
chrispolanco.com
DOJ redacting the Epstein files
December 23, 2025 at 9:56 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
chrispolanco.com
Make it make sense. 😒 #utft
December 20, 2025 at 10:02 PM
chrispolanco.com
Make it make sense. 😒 #utft
December 20, 2025 at 10:02 PM
chrispolanco.com
bro whatever is in them Epstein files must be CRAZY.
atrupar.com Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 26d
Trump: "Venezuela is completely surrounded by the largest Armada ever assembled ... It will only get bigger, and the shock to them will be like nothing they have ever seen before — Until such time as they return to the USA all of the Oil, Land, and other Assets that they previously stole from us."
Venezuela is completely surrounded by the largest Armada ever assembled in the History of South America. It will only get bigger, and the shock to them will be like nothing they have ever seen before — Until such time as they return to the United States of America all of the Oil, Land, and other Assets that they previously stole from us. The illegitimate Maduro Regime is using Oil from these stolen Oil Fields to finance themselves, Drug Terrorism, Human Trafficking, Murder, and Kidnapping. For the theft of our Assets, and many other reasons, including Terrorism, Drug Smuggling, and Human Trafficking, the Venezuelan Regime has been designated a FOREIGN TERRORIST ORGANIZATION. Therefore, today, I am ordering A TOTAL AND COMPLETE BLOCKADE OF ALL SANCTIONED OIL TANKERS going into, and out of, Venezuela. The Illegal Aliens and Criminals that the Maduro Regime has sent into the United States during the weak and inept Biden Administration, are being returned to Venezuela at a rapid pace. America will not allow Criminals, Terrorists, or other Countries, to rob, threaten, or harm our Nation and, likewise, will not allow a Hostile Regime to take our Oil, Land, or any other Assets, all of which must be returned to the United States, IMMEDIATELY. Thank you for your attention to this matter!
December 17, 2025 at 4:44 AM
chrispolanco.com
NBA Cup > NBA Finals

I have always said this.
December 17, 2025 at 4:16 AM
chrispolanco.com
December 16, 2025 at 10:55 PM
chrispolanco.com
Well, this was fun. 🤩
soccercooligans.com The Cooligans @soccercooligans.com · Dec 11
Talking @usmnt.ussoccer.com with the NYC Mayor-Elect @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social on a subway ride from the Bronx to Manhattan! 🗽 #WorldCup

Check out the full interview ⬇️

APPLE: tinyurl.com/4ks27rnd
SPOTIFY: tinyurl.com/msakmty2
YOUTUBE: youtu.be/xOaFp28gQL4
December 11, 2025 at 11:45 PM
chrispolanco.com
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.

Scott Pilgrim is a perfect film imo. Fantastic script. Next to no wasted moments or dialogue. Good jokes. Great cameos. A fun movie that I could never get bored of.
December 11, 2025 at 4:02 AM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
Not an underdog in sight. 😅

Had a great time meeting Jaedyn Shaw at the @ussoccer.com Road To ‘26 World Cup Draw Show in Times Square. 🦇
December 10, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
World Cup Draw Live Reaction Show at 2pm ET! We'll be live on our Youtube channel AND across all Yahoo Sports channels as soon as the draw is over. Join us in the chat and we'll highlight the best comments!

📺: youtube.com/live/XmZfV-Y...
December 5, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
Former USMNT star Clint Dempsey joins the pod to discuss Mauricio Pochettino's impact on the team and why he has helped the squad improve its play over his first year in charge. ✌️

📺 youtu.be/CXlb8nmw_Ek
🍎 : tinyurl.com/3rzv3rda
🟢 : tinyurl.com/266auzkc
December 2, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
Are Inter Miami FC unplayable right now? 🥵

@TaylorTwellman.bsky.social on Lionel Messi and Inter Miami's world-beating run through the MLS playoffs 🌴

🍎 : tinyurl.com/3rzv3rda
🟢 : tinyurl.com/266auzkc
📺 : youtu.be/KpD8TXsclzA
December 1, 2025 at 11:59 PM
chrispolanco.com
Not like this. 😔 #nycfc
November 30, 2025 at 1:39 AM
Reposted by Christian Polanco
soccercooligans.com
“Messi is arguably the best in the world, but we have…Justin Haak.” #MLSCupPlayoffs
November 30, 2025 at 12:04 AM
chrispolanco.com
I’m at my niece’s 1st birthday party while also watching Inter Miami vs NYCFC. The pink birthday theme feels like betrayal. 😭🗽 #MLSCupPlayoffs
November 30, 2025 at 12:17 AM
chrispolanco.com
Micheal Keane played better after getting slapped. #UTFT
a man in a suit and white shirt is saying i 'm just saying
ALT: a man in a suit and white shirt is saying i 'm just saying
media.tenor.com
November 24, 2025 at 10:02 PM