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Clare Blackwood

@clareblackwood.bsky.social

25K followers 920 following 3.6K posts

Actor/comedian/writer. Words in The Beaverton, CBC Comedy, McSweeney’s, etc. Pierre Poilievre's personal assistant Mandy. she/her [email protected] https://buymeacoffee.com/clareblackwood

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · Mar 8

Listening to radio ads right now is like "Canadians are strong. Canadians are tough. Canadians never back down. Canadians deserve the best. That's why at Bob's Lube Garage, we know your tire lube should smell like poutine and Lake Erie fish,"

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 16h

we're doing the studies to make the proof

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 19h

RFK Jr on Tylenol and autism: "It is not proof. We're doing the studies to make the proof."

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 18h

Yo don't I know it 😬

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 18h

Ooooh dramatic, I love it

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 18h

If I hadn't vowed to not go into the US until the fascist is out, I genuinely would rent a damn car

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 18h

Me too! I hope they're going to do general admission tickets this time around as well.

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 20h

Would have to have a first mortgage for that 😂

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 20h

SURELY

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 20h

Tickets to the Blue Jays ALCS games are now starting at around $700 resale, so I guess I'll be tunnelling my way in via right field like some sort of baseball-loving mole

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

And like, we don't even boo them! We tried it once, it barely caught on, and we left it alone!

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Gausman thought for a second and then said fuck it we ball out, and that's why he's my dude

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

I wanna be hired as a commentator, I would be so great and no network would air me

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Hey, y'all are still in it! Good luck tomorrow! 😊

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

BREAKING: Furious American sports networks advance to next round of trying to pretend the Blue Jays aren't good

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Eric "I helped save the season" Lauerrrrrr

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

WE BEEEEE

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

it's fine

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Incredible. What a damn manager he's been this year.

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Yo, your team gave us the run of a lifetime these last two games. Good for them. Congrats to you as well. 😊

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

I cannot stress enough:

Our motherfucking bullpen chewed through the best offensive team in baseball and only allowed SIX HITS, after most of them had to play unexpectedly.

Just absolute balls of steel. Eric Lauer deserves a statue outside the SkyDome.

UnREAL team effort.

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

THE TORONTO BLUE JAYS ARE GOING TO THE AMERICAN LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES

BULLPEN ARE ABSOLUTE DAWGS

NATHAN LUKES DREAM GAME

VLADDY IS THE 500 MILLION DOLLAR MAN

AHHH 🐦💙⚾

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Oh goodness, thank you so much!!

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

Aw man, thank you! It's always so fun to do, doesn't ever feel like work 😊

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

not to be mushy on main or whatever but I get strangers coming up to me on the street now saying that my silly little online jokes and videos make their day better and tbh I don't think there's much that's cooler than that

Conrad Hackett @conradhackett.bsky.social · 2d

Has anything great happened in your life because of social media?

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Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

I'll never give up on them, if I suffered through last year I can handle anything

Clare Blackwood @clareblackwood.bsky.social · 1d

No, I made a hyperbolize joke

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