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Diane Messias

@comedywriter.bsky.social

2.4K followers 2.7K following 8.6K posts

Triste satirist https://notesfromcuckooisland.blog/2023/05/02/welcome-to-my-world/ DMs not enabled

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · Nov 13

"Your sense of humour is so utterly infinitesimal, you're the least funny person I've ever encountered & I know some really unfunny people."

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 1h

Looks like a tragedy to me - look at her face!

Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 5h

Don't say we didn't warn you.

#DigitalID

Government defends expansion of digital ID plans to include children as young as 13

The comments were in response to a petition against the measures, signed by more than 2.8 million people

www.independent.co.uk

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 5h

Migrant with AK-47 face tattoo found guilty of threatening to kill Nigel Farage

Fayaz Khan said he was coming to England and was going to "pop, pop, pop" Nigel Farage after the Reform leader posted a video of the Afghan national coming to the UK in a small boat.

news.sky.com

Reposted by Diane Messias

George Conway 👊🇺🇸🔥 @gtconway.bsky.social · 1d

www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 5h

I won't on here - it was probably her assistant. 😉

Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 5h

Sounds like a sure thing to me, unless you were pitching it at Radio 4.

🤷‍♀️

Reposted by Diane Messias

#𝓡𝓮𝓼𝓲𝓼𝓽𝑭𝑶𝑻𝑼𝑺 @feldakat.bsky.social · 10h

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 6h

Ah...

Did you start off by saying Hi De Hi?

I wrote to a (minor) media personality when she revisited a house where she used to live in Hampstead on her YouTube channel, saying I thought I'd lived in the very same room.

The tumbleweed is deafening.

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Reposted by Diane Messias

George Conway 👊🇺🇸🔥 @gtconway.bsky.social · 8h

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Reposted by Diane Messias

George Conway 👊🇺🇸🔥 @gtconway.bsky.social · 8h

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 6h

Not your fault how she treats her staff!

Not sure I understand...it was negative and in Pollard's name?

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Look who's back...

#YourParty #ButNotHerPartyForAWhile #ThoughItIsAgainNow #Apparently #LetsSeeHowLongItLasts

Zarah Sultana MP @zarahsultana.bsky.social · 22h

We’re not here to beg for crumbs off the table — we’re coming for the lot.

The billionaires already have three parties working for them.

It’s about time the rest of us had one.

Join yourparty.uk today.

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Are you also sending them a quid?

Noriega vs Sue Pollard. Tricky one.

Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

He had a brain tumour in the end. (And probably in the beginning.)

Still, responding to fan letters has to count for something.

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Wonder if it was another 'overly-friendly' missive?

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Can't quite bring myself to 'like' that post. 🙁

Reposted by Diane Messias

Mark Jacob @markjacob.bsky.social · 7h

It's free reign for real criminals as Trump's FBI focuses on immigrant grandmas.

Nearly half of FBI agents in major offices reassigned to immigration enforcement

Data shows stunning shift in law enforcement priorities that has raised public safety concerns

www.theguardian.com

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Reposted by Diane Messias

David Waywell @davidwaywell.bsky.social · 1d

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Reposted by Diane Messias

BremainInSpain @bremaininspain.com · 7h

Say it loud, say it proud, Nigel Farage is a racist.

Adam Bienkov @adambienkov.bsky.social · 1d

Nigel Farage accuses teachers of "poisoning our kids" on race issues.

Here's a reminder of what teachers and fellow pupils at Farage's own school remember of his own views on that subject.

www.adambienkov.co.uk/p/nigel-fara...

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Reposted by Diane Messias

Roland Smith @rolandmcs.bsky.social · 1d

Out of sheer morbid curiosity, I'd like to hear the intellectual case for *not* rejoining Erasmus.

Best for Britain @bestforbritain.org · 1d

Charley Robinson makes a great case for the UK rejoining Erasmus.

British students deserve the same opportunities as before. Erasmus is a vital opportunity that we can no longer afford to miss out on.

UK Trade & Business Commission @uktradebusiness.bsky.social · 1d

🚨 Charley Robinson, Head of Global Mobility Policy, Universities UK: "We're really supportive of the UK rejoining Erasmus is going to provide that kind of critical, long term, sustainable funding for students, staff mobility and exchanges."

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Reposted by Diane Messias

M Meerkat @kackbro.bsky.social · 10h

Gavin Knows What He's Talking
About.......

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SAM @samierens.bsky.social · 3d

This needs to go viral!!

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Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Dame Edna - the original 'housewife, mother, superstar' - will be turning in her grave that Meghan's attempting to be funnier than she was.

Meghan Markle - 'mother, wife, awful employer, world class narcissist'.

/3

Diane Messias @comedywriter.bsky.social · 7h

Meghan was praised as 'a mother, wife, entrepreneur, and philanthropist'. Harry's work with mental health companies and his controversial 2021 memoir Spare were listed among his achievements.

🤡

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