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Cran Stoker’s Dracula

@cranfath3r.bsky.social

540 followers 380 following 3.4K posts

Middle aged husband, dad, all forms of metal, rock, hip hop, etc etc Plus video games! Live GT: PP5oneDOOdoo Nu Metal Agenda Podcast co-host; Niko and Chris Bears Post-Game Wrap-Up co-host

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1h

This was solid gold you fucking ingrates

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

More like the Nobel Piece of Shit Prize

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 2h

“This feller says rodeo awful funny but he’s alright in my book. YEE YEE”

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 2h

We drove through in August on the way to Colorado and I never thought I’d be glad to see Iowa again lol

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 15h

Allow me to give you a guided tour of Nebraska, in case you’ve never been:

Here it is

A corn field. From Iowa to Colorado, this is it

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 16h

Have you sever seen a more apartment carpet in your life

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 16h

Found a super cheap furnished apartment in Nebraska while I’m here for work, but two of the bedrooms weren’t finished but you know what? Might just lay on the floor in there one of these nights

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

I saw them in ‘22 and when they started flashing graphics supporting abortion as a healthcare right people started WALKING OUT. WHO did they think they were coming to see??

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

More like the Nobel Piece of Shit Prize

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

They only hear the “fuck you I won’t do what you tell me” part and apply it to their liberal coworkers

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

Conservatives are like sharks but for shutting the fuck up

Acyn @acyn.bsky.social · 1d

Kid Rock: Do you know what is stupid… these chicks running around on campuses with blue hair, five nose rings.

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 18h

The Star Wars remaster ending but it’s Epstein, Charlie Kirk, and Ian Watkins looking on

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 19h

Conan O’Brien later had the network debut of Slipknot and its rumored they only agreed to do the show because Conan was such a big Hum fan

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 19h

How anyone could mishear “so now I’m rolling down Rodeo with a shotgun/these people ain’t seen a brown skin man since their grandparents bought one” is beyond me

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 20h

Pete Davidson kinda did, and Shane Gillis said he had his agent stop responding because he knew eventually they’d say an amount he couldn’t say no to

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 22h

Maybe the funniest thing about the whole Riyadh debacle is Aziz Ansari going on national television and being like “actually if you think about it, it was very brave of me to do this”

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

As a White Sox fan I guess I have no room to talk about real baseball but it’s always been Sox and whoever plays the cubs lol, I’m an honorary Brew Crew member right now

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

The Cubs winning in 2016 with all that Ricketts money is what broke the fabric of reality and began the series of events that brought us to direct and inescapable fascism

Plus that dipshit third baseman that skipped a game to go to Charlie Kirk’s funeral celebration

acabylon 👻 BOO! 👻 @acabylonbee.bsky.social · 1d

yeah im going to need the cubs to win the national league

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

A Wrestling Post™️ is coming, don’t say I didn’t warn you

It just occurred to me that Joe Hendry is just Orange Cassidy, and they even lifted the “he’s in random places” bit from a couple years back

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

Love to see a funny joke turned into a dogshit apparel item, personally

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

Live did the same thing for Throwing Copper, it was a great show but I wanna hear Waitress live!!
Also, out of curiosity, which song are they not playing? I adore LD50

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Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*catches breath*

…HAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUCK

“it’s called corpse paint” im fucking DEAD

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 1d

Here’s the vibe for today

A coffee cup lid with a happy and content chill guy holding a warm cup of The Good Stuff (coffee)™️

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 2d

…for NOTHING!! Got em

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 2d

Sleep Token has exactly one good song, and it’s a Loathe cover so it’s not even their good song

Cran Stoker’s Dracula @cranfath3r.bsky.social · 2d

Why did they need convincing, that’s just a fact