Simon Harris
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harukizaemon.com
Simon Harris
@harukizaemon.com
🏳️‍⚧️ Trans rights are human rights.
🖤 Living on Wurundjeri land.
☕️ Made a joke about non-dairy crema.
🤷‍♂️ Opinions are sometimes mine, sometimes others, rarely substantiated.

https://harukizaemon.com

https://aus.social/@haruki_zaemon
✅✅❌✅✅✅❌✅✅✅
The Saturday Paper Quiz No. 579
We got 8/10 plus bonus, so 9/11 in my artisanal scoring scheme!
December 5, 2025 at 11:26 PM
I'm surprised they didn't go with the @atp.fm title: "Leather and no bottom, just the way John likes it"
December 5, 2025 at 1:04 AM
My day isn't progressing as fast as I probably need it to.
December 4, 2025 at 10:37 PM
If I didn't work for a publicly-listed European company, I'd be sorely tempted to go full clown mode on my LinkedIn account. What an absolute garbage fire of a platform.
December 4, 2025 at 10:29 PM
If 53 years of watching movies has taught me anything, it’s that everyone in New York is in therapy.

(Therapy can be a very good thing, in case you’re wondering)
December 4, 2025 at 10:04 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
December 4, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
The last decade is the story of how computers got boring. I discovered yesterday that my iPad is five years old (because the keyboard cover that fits it is discontinued, which is another story), and even as a lifelong power-user nerd, there’s no reason for me to want a newer one.
Possibly the most banal Apple App Store winners ever. A todo app with AI. Video editing app with AI. VR. Strava. HBO Max. Pokémon.🥱
December 4, 2025 at 8:24 PM
Possibly the most banal Apple App Store winners ever. A todo app with AI. Video editing app with AI. VR. Strava. HBO Max. Pokémon.🥱
December 4, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
Beignet Blanc Investigates the Case of Cookie Monster’s Missing Pie in a ‘Sesame Street’ Parody of ‘Knives Out’ laughingsquid.com/sesame-stree...
Benoit Blanc Investigates the Case of Cookie Monster's Missing Pie in a 'Sesame Street' Parody of 'Knives Out'
Sesame Street characters employ the services of detective Benoit Blanc to investigate the case of Cookie Monster's missing pie.
laughingsquid.com
December 4, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
Really not entirely clear when people write and send newsletter why they need to be tracking which links I click on
December 4, 2025 at 7:40 PM
We’re truly fucked
The co-founder of Kalshi says: " The long-term vision is to financialize everything and create a tradable asset out of any difference in opinion."
December 4, 2025 at 2:00 AM
In other news: I'm fucking exhausted. Like, seriously exhausted. This has been a huge year on so many fronts. I'm struggling to make it through each day without some form of emotional dysregulation. Sounds like burnout. Looking forward to some time off.
December 4, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Not understanding how to manage risk effectively is seemingly a highly valued skill in government and commercial enterprise alike.
December 3, 2025 at 10:30 PM
Thankfully, not a single 15yo will be relying on banned social media platforms to connect and communicate with their 16yo friends. So that's fortunate.
December 3, 2025 at 9:54 PM
In news wholly unrelated to a certain high-profile departure from Apple, a Mac app that draws a border around the active window, named "Alan": tyler.io/2025/11/alan/
Alan.app – tyler.io
tyler.io
December 3, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Management by fucking around (and seemingly never finding out)
December 3, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
Q. What’s the politics and culture of NSW like, historically and in the present?

A. In this story all is revealed

archive.md/u63b7
archive.md
December 2, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
I've had a rough day, and I think I've earned this.

GOAT PAJAMA PARTY.

Goats are from @sunflowerfarm.bsky.social in Cumberland, Maine (via their YT). Bless their chaotic little hearts and tiny pink noses.
December 3, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Reposted by Simon Harris
It’s not that hard mate, I’m really enjoying my winter holiday in Australia.
December 3, 2025 at 12:32 AM
I find the American cultural norm of using seasons as a time reference device so weird.

"Such and such is stepping down in spring" means absolutely nothing to anyone in the Southern Hemisphere without some mental gymnastics.
December 2, 2025 at 9:03 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
Absolutely amazing!

And now I'm also trying to figure out which production of Arcadia I saw around this time. I thought it was in London, but I'd already left by 1993. So maybe Sydney? Regardless, I loved it.

And next year I will see it in London!
Great culture can save lives. Literally.

Amazing letter in today’s @thetimes.com about Tom Stoppard
December 2, 2025 at 11:00 AM
Checks his SPAM folder for the dinner invitation
December 2, 2025 at 10:38 AM
Reposted by Simon Harris
I received an "F" on my dental school paper for writing "the tooth fairy takes 'em while you sleep" and now I'm suing the school for religious discrimination
December 1, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
This is what I love about social media. A story in a paper that you know doesn't add up, but you dont know how to work it out. So along comes Emma and explains it all for you. Yet again sterling work and much appreciated.
Wow - this guy must be really, REALLY bad with money if an extra £208 per month will “ruin” his retirement.

Let’s take a look at his situation based on what he told the @Telegraph

Because this does NOT add up!

No, this is not a “poor pensioner” scrabbling around for pennies…

🧵1/9
November 29, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Reposted by Simon Harris
I am old enough to remember when the unis forced everyone to return to the classrooms during covid, refused to allow anyone to take a gap year, and endangered us all because they wanted the rent money. But I guess they have a new scam now. Won't even need students soon!
'The Russell Group institution, one of the UK’s largest, has announced plans to expand beyond its traditional fully campus-based model of higher education and increase its digital and global presence, as well as its flexible learning opportunities.' 1/2
Half of Manchester students to be learning online in 10 years
Russell Group institution announces major pivot into digital teaching as universities evolve further beyond traditional models
www.timeshighereducation.com
December 1, 2025 at 9:38 AM