Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
@hazelebaumgartner.bsky.social
Artist, author, musician, witch, and Hot Wheels collector. I make music under the name Hazel Bee and write books under the name Hazel E. Baumgartner, which is also my name.
30, she/they, 99% lesbian, USA 🇺🇸🏳️🌈
Buy my book: https://a.co/d/6Aanpc7
30, she/they, 99% lesbian, USA 🇺🇸🏳️🌈
Buy my book: https://a.co/d/6Aanpc7
Pinned
My pinned post disappeared again so HI! If you like gorey monster stories, suspenseful mysteries, supernatural thrillers, cryptid horror, and books where the killer in the woods is a metaphor for grief, you should check out my debut novel, "The Woods: A Horror Novel", out now!
a.co/d/6dTmubc
a.co/d/6dTmubc
Today was a little better than yesterday health wise, but I slept about fifteen hours and didn't get shit done. Lethargy is a bitch, and is a hallmark sign of heart health issues. And trying to quit caffeine this week (for my heart, ironically) isn't helping any.
February 5, 2026 at 6:22 AM
Today was a little better than yesterday health wise, but I slept about fifteen hours and didn't get shit done. Lethargy is a bitch, and is a hallmark sign of heart health issues. And trying to quit caffeine this week (for my heart, ironically) isn't helping any.
Gavin Newsom had Steve Bannon on his podcast after he did a nazi salute at CPAC. I will NOT vote for a nazi sympathizer. Full stop.
Just a reminder that Gavin Newsom betrayed one of his most vulnerable constituencies.
He cannot be the Democratic nominee.
He cannot be the Democratic nominee.
February 5, 2026 at 5:54 AM
Gavin Newsom had Steve Bannon on his podcast after he did a nazi salute at CPAC. I will NOT vote for a nazi sympathizer. Full stop.
If you think about it, being an "AI author" is just being a scammer with extra steps.
February 4, 2026 at 9:36 PM
If you think about it, being an "AI author" is just being a scammer with extra steps.
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
It's World Cancer Day.
I’m highlighting Macmillan Cancer Support and the fundraiser for our dearly departed Matt 🕯️🤍 who we lost to cancer last year.
Matt started #HorrorWritersChat which has grown into our dear community.
Please also check out his books under MG Mason @chaoticauthor.online
I’m highlighting Macmillan Cancer Support and the fundraiser for our dearly departed Matt 🕯️🤍 who we lost to cancer last year.
Matt started #HorrorWritersChat which has grown into our dear community.
Please also check out his books under MG Mason @chaoticauthor.online
Fundraiser in Memory of Matt Mason for Macmillan Cancer Support
Help Louise Willingham raise money to support Macmillan Cancer Support
www.justgiving.com
February 4, 2026 at 8:00 PM
It's World Cancer Day.
I’m highlighting Macmillan Cancer Support and the fundraiser for our dearly departed Matt 🕯️🤍 who we lost to cancer last year.
Matt started #HorrorWritersChat which has grown into our dear community.
Please also check out his books under MG Mason @chaoticauthor.online
I’m highlighting Macmillan Cancer Support and the fundraiser for our dearly departed Matt 🕯️🤍 who we lost to cancer last year.
Matt started #HorrorWritersChat which has grown into our dear community.
Please also check out his books under MG Mason @chaoticauthor.online
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
Kid Rock vs Bad Bunny
Read the SHOCKING LYRICS!!!!
Read the SHOCKING LYRICS!!!!
February 4, 2026 at 7:06 PM
Kid Rock vs Bad Bunny
Read the SHOCKING LYRICS!!!!
Read the SHOCKING LYRICS!!!!
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
My pinned post disappeared again so HI! If you like gorey monster stories, suspenseful mysteries, supernatural thrillers, cryptid horror, and books where the killer in the woods is a metaphor for grief, you should check out my debut novel, "The Woods: A Horror Novel", out now!
a.co/d/6dTmubc
a.co/d/6dTmubc
August 19, 2025 at 6:05 AM
My pinned post disappeared again so HI! If you like gorey monster stories, suspenseful mysteries, supernatural thrillers, cryptid horror, and books where the killer in the woods is a metaphor for grief, you should check out my debut novel, "The Woods: A Horror Novel", out now!
a.co/d/6dTmubc
a.co/d/6dTmubc
I'm skipping the last question because I'm going thru my own health stuff and it's too real rn.
My link to buy my book is currently down but if you just follow me on here I'll post when it's back up. Just having issues with Ingram. I also have a discord!
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
#HorrorWritersChat
My link to buy my book is currently down but if you just follow me on here I'll post when it's back up. Just having issues with Ingram. I also have a discord!
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
#HorrorWritersChat
February 4, 2026 at 8:01 PM
I'm skipping the last question because I'm going thru my own health stuff and it's too real rn.
My link to buy my book is currently down but if you just follow me on here I'll post when it's back up. Just having issues with Ingram. I also have a discord!
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
#HorrorWritersChat
My link to buy my book is currently down but if you just follow me on here I'll post when it's back up. Just having issues with Ingram. I also have a discord!
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
#HorrorWritersChat
Sabine is seriously injured early on in #Heliruna and spends most of the book in a wheelchair, but if anything it teaches her to rely on her body less and her mind more. I've become disabled myself since my first book, so it was a very personal aspect to include in the novel. #HorrorWritersChat
#HorrorWritersChat
Our bodies are the homes that house us.
Sometimes they work to our advantage.
Sometimes they can work against us.
Q3: Describe the physical characteristics of one of your horror story characters.
Is there anything about their body that helps or hinders them in their story?
Our bodies are the homes that house us.
Sometimes they work to our advantage.
Sometimes they can work against us.
Q3: Describe the physical characteristics of one of your horror story characters.
Is there anything about their body that helps or hinders them in their story?
February 4, 2026 at 7:44 PM
Sabine is seriously injured early on in #Heliruna and spends most of the book in a wheelchair, but if anything it teaches her to rely on her body less and her mind more. I've become disabled myself since my first book, so it was a very personal aspect to include in the novel. #HorrorWritersChat
I wanted to write #Heliruna as a haunted house story, but the house didn't end up factoring that much. The old Kansas farmhouse serves fine as a setting, but it's more of a "house that is haunted" than a "haunted house" if that makes sense.
#HorrorWritersChat
#HorrorWritersChat
#HorrorWritersChat
In fiction, homes tell us something about their inhabitants.
Q2: How do the living spaces in your horror reflect your characters?
In fiction, homes tell us something about their inhabitants.
Q2: How do the living spaces in your horror reflect your characters?
February 4, 2026 at 7:28 PM
I wanted to write #Heliruna as a haunted house story, but the house didn't end up factoring that much. The old Kansas farmhouse serves fine as a setting, but it's more of a "house that is haunted" than a "haunted house" if that makes sense.
#HorrorWritersChat
#HorrorWritersChat
I'm Hazel, I write supernatural thrillers and slasher, and I have two answers. For movies, it's "Hush" (2016), for books, it's Shirley Jackon's "We Have Always Lived In The Castle" (1962).
Welcome to #HorrorWritersChat
I hope you've grabbed a snack and a drink in a cosy spot.
Let's begin.
Q1: Introduce yourself and the horror subgenres you write.
Then, share your favourite horror story/movie set inside a home.
I hope you've grabbed a snack and a drink in a cosy spot.
Let's begin.
Q1: Introduce yourself and the horror subgenres you write.
Then, share your favourite horror story/movie set inside a home.
February 4, 2026 at 7:10 PM
I'm Hazel, I write supernatural thrillers and slasher, and I have two answers. For movies, it's "Hush" (2016), for books, it's Shirley Jackon's "We Have Always Lived In The Castle" (1962).
"Imagine if we had to check that we had the right patient before amputating."
Impeach and prosecute Moscow Mike too.
Impeach and prosecute Moscow Mike too.
February 4, 2026 at 5:25 PM
"Imagine if we had to check that we had the right patient before amputating."
Impeach and prosecute Moscow Mike too.
Impeach and prosecute Moscow Mike too.
One day very soon, we're all going to wake up to very good news.
February 4, 2026 at 4:49 PM
One day very soon, we're all going to wake up to very good news.
How to spot an author's keyboard.
Most worn out keys are E, H, N, M, right shift, and space.
Most worn out keys are E, H, N, M, right shift, and space.
February 4, 2026 at 6:58 AM
How to spot an author's keyboard.
Most worn out keys are E, H, N, M, right shift, and space.
Most worn out keys are E, H, N, M, right shift, and space.
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
Just realized I have two more books to go before I'm officially halfway through reading all 41 #Discworld novels 🥲
Reading slightly out of order so I've read TCOM thru Small Gods, Hogfather, and the 5 Tiffany Aching books. Next up is Lords and Ladies, then halfway thru Men At Arms is the 1/2 point.
Reading slightly out of order so I've read TCOM thru Small Gods, Hogfather, and the 5 Tiffany Aching books. Next up is Lords and Ladies, then halfway thru Men At Arms is the 1/2 point.
February 4, 2026 at 2:53 AM
Just realized I have two more books to go before I'm officially halfway through reading all 41 #Discworld novels 🥲
Reading slightly out of order so I've read TCOM thru Small Gods, Hogfather, and the 5 Tiffany Aching books. Next up is Lords and Ladies, then halfway thru Men At Arms is the 1/2 point.
Reading slightly out of order so I've read TCOM thru Small Gods, Hogfather, and the 5 Tiffany Aching books. Next up is Lords and Ladies, then halfway thru Men At Arms is the 1/2 point.
I have this very crude sketch that I did of the Carlini Property from "The Woods" just so I'd know where everything was in relation to each other. It's also from so early on that there's no hunting cabin despite a significant portion of the final novel happening there.
February 4, 2026 at 1:23 AM
I have this very crude sketch that I did of the Carlini Property from "The Woods" just so I'd know where everything was in relation to each other. It's also from so early on that there's no hunting cabin despite a significant portion of the final novel happening there.
You: "Describe your WIP in the worst way possible."
Me: "Two lesbians overcome their evil ex girlfriend through the power of old ladies."
Me: "Two lesbians overcome their evil ex girlfriend through the power of old ladies."
You: "Describe your WIP in the worst way possible."
Me: A middle aged, chubster, former real estate agent guy wins the heart of a dragon princess through the power of baking.
You: ...
Me: Also, there are blow jobs.
You: <walking away>
Me: A middle aged, chubster, former real estate agent guy wins the heart of a dragon princess through the power of baking.
You: ...
Me: Also, there are blow jobs.
You: <walking away>
You: "Describe your WIP in the worst way possible."
Me: "A snarky asshole becomes Papa Smurf to a bunch of dumbass demons and Gargamel (Metatron) and his cat (Satan) try to sell their home to a dude who needs him to out-smurf his bosses.
You: "God has abandoned us."
Me: "Damn right."
#WriteSky
Me: "A snarky asshole becomes Papa Smurf to a bunch of dumbass demons and Gargamel (Metatron) and his cat (Satan) try to sell their home to a dude who needs him to out-smurf his bosses.
You: "God has abandoned us."
Me: "Damn right."
#WriteSky
February 4, 2026 at 1:03 AM
You: "Describe your WIP in the worst way possible."
Me: "Two lesbians overcome their evil ex girlfriend through the power of old ladies."
Me: "Two lesbians overcome their evil ex girlfriend through the power of old ladies."
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
All the magic in #Heliruna comes from an ancient curse. A group of women were accused of being witches and expelled from their homeland, so an actual witch took pity on them and granted their bloodline unnaturally long life and foresight, among other things, known as "The Cunning". #Febchantment
#Febchantment Day 3
What is the central concept of your magic system? E.g. Elemental magic? Music magic? Name-based magic? Something else? (Note: this isn't the "source" of magic - that's Day 8!)
If you already answered this previously, feel free to go into more detail!
#writingcommunity #writesky
What is the central concept of your magic system? E.g. Elemental magic? Music magic? Name-based magic? Something else? (Note: this isn't the "source" of magic - that's Day 8!)
If you already answered this previously, feel free to go into more detail!
#writingcommunity #writesky
February 3, 2026 at 8:44 PM
All the magic in #Heliruna comes from an ancient curse. A group of women were accused of being witches and expelled from their homeland, so an actual witch took pity on them and granted their bloodline unnaturally long life and foresight, among other things, known as "The Cunning". #Febchantment
My Discord horror server turned one year old the other day. Neat.
Horror writers and fans join here:
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
Horror writers and fans join here:
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
Join the Hazel E. Baumgartner's Cryptid Club Discord Server!
Official fanclub for Hazel E. Baumgartner's horror novels, plus just horror in general. If it's spoopy, it goes here. Double check server rules and don't be a jerk. | 56 members
discord.gg
February 3, 2026 at 8:16 PM
My Discord horror server turned one year old the other day. Neat.
Horror writers and fans join here:
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
Horror writers and fans join here:
discord.gg/gc5rYvjXhu
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
Harry Potter fan in 2026: yes the author is a Nazi with ties to Jeffrey Epstein but I don't see any of that when I buy my annual wand at the Wizarding World in Florida
February 1, 2026 at 7:50 PM
Harry Potter fan in 2026: yes the author is a Nazi with ties to Jeffrey Epstein but I don't see any of that when I buy my annual wand at the Wizarding World in Florida
Reposted by Hazel E. Baumgartner, Author of "The Woods"
Okay, so:
Wherefore = why. Wherefore didst thou eat that spider?
Wherefore 2.0 = therefore. He eateth spiders, wherefore I doubt him.
Whither = where you’re going. Whither flee the spiders?
Whence = where you came from. Whence cometh this swarm of flies?
Know your wheres, my spiderlings.
Wherefore = why. Wherefore didst thou eat that spider?
Wherefore 2.0 = therefore. He eateth spiders, wherefore I doubt him.
Whither = where you’re going. Whither flee the spiders?
Whence = where you came from. Whence cometh this swarm of flies?
Know your wheres, my spiderlings.
February 3, 2026 at 6:37 PM
Okay, so:
Wherefore = why. Wherefore didst thou eat that spider?
Wherefore 2.0 = therefore. He eateth spiders, wherefore I doubt him.
Whither = where you’re going. Whither flee the spiders?
Whence = where you came from. Whence cometh this swarm of flies?
Know your wheres, my spiderlings.
Wherefore = why. Wherefore didst thou eat that spider?
Wherefore 2.0 = therefore. He eateth spiders, wherefore I doubt him.
Whither = where you’re going. Whither flee the spiders?
Whence = where you came from. Whence cometh this swarm of flies?
Know your wheres, my spiderlings.
JK Rowling being in the Epstein Files is somehow not surprising to me at all.
if you live in the UK you might get sued if you say it
if you live everywhere else, lol JK straight up in direct contact with the kiddy diddling ring
if you live everywhere else, lol JK straight up in direct contact with the kiddy diddling ring
🤔 It’s definitely not suspicious at all to have people point out your common Twitter sign off is in the Epstein files and ten completely delete your yacht’s logs right?
February 3, 2026 at 5:38 PM
JK Rowling being in the Epstein Files is somehow not surprising to me at all.
Congress needs to investigate how Trump's net worth has ballooned from $1.1 billion to $7 billion in the past two years. Bribes? Hush money? Blatant theft? My guess is all of the above.
February 3, 2026 at 5:35 PM
Congress needs to investigate how Trump's net worth has ballooned from $1.1 billion to $7 billion in the past two years. Bribes? Hush money? Blatant theft? My guess is all of the above.