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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 41m

Thanks for bringing back those traumatic childhood memories! 🤣🤣🤣

I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 54m

Boss left for the day. The building is quiet.

Guess what I'm NOT going to do during this downtime?

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 2h

Since it's a work day, I'm going to dress as a maintenance technician. (Usually, I wear business casual but that's my preference. Boss doesn't care.)
So, blue work shirt, jeans, boots, and cap. I'm already practicing saying, "Those goll-durn sonsabitches I tell you what."

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 3h

I've been trying to get Boss to understand that I don't have enough time to enter all these work orders. I haven't even started Oct yet.
"Do what you can do."
And what? Not enter them?
"Do them as you have spare time."

THERE ISN'T SPARE TIME! THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!
😡

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 5h

Get 'em, Hamish! Get those pigeons and bin men! 🥰

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 5h

Boss brought in sausage biscuits for everyone.

Boss: I've got mustard in my drawer if you want some
Me: I'm not familiar with that euphemism.
Boss:
Me:
Boss: 🤣🤣🤣

I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 5h

😆😆😆

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 7h

godsdammit Timothy! You go to your room right now and you think about what you've done!

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 7h

Are you like a house-flipper but with trucks? Or are you accumulating a fleet?

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 7h

You know where to find me if you need me. Like, literally. You know where I live.

🫂💜🫂

Reposted by I saw dead people but I have an alibi

Medusa’s Wink😉 @medusaswink.bsky.social · 11h

#FridayFundDay
Here’s our request thread for the week of Oct. 10

If you were posting #MutualAid💸💞 requests in #Link’s Friday threads, you’re welcome to post here too!
I sstart a new 🧵 each Friday.

*All requests are welcome*

Moots, your boosting help is even more appreciated 🤟🏻
Thank yous 🖤

Medusa’s Wink😉 @medusaswink.bsky.social · 6d

Happy Friday all! Here’s our Mutual Aid 💸💞 thread for the week of Oct. 3
Post requests/updates here for a boost 🙂

Take your meds 💊

Hydrate🚰

Water your green pets 🌿

Check in with yourself 🫵🏼

Check in with your people👩🏻‍🦽‍➡️🧑🏽‍🦯🦮

Halloweeeen 🎃 🧙🏻‍♀️🧝🏾‍♀️🧛🏻‍♂️🧟‍♀️🥷🏻🦸🏾🧑🏿‍🍳👻

When in doubt, ask yourself-
What would Geordi say 🖖🏾

Same 2 paneled Geordi/Drake meme

This time the No panel reads: “Reconciliation & Healing”

The Yes panel reads:
“Motherfucking Consequences”

Same Geordi/Drake meme:

The text for the No panel reads,
“Do not comply in advance" for 3 reasons:
"bossy, already a cliche, implies permission to comply later."

The text for the Yes panel reads, "Fuck you, make me" and compares the 3 reasons:
"leads by example, directs yelling at opposition instead of allies, easy to chant at a protest or put on a banner."

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 7h

There's a reason I have a BS in English

A man in a toga is sitting on a golden futon with a Staff of Google and a Sphere of Wikipedia. Two women are kneeling before him, pouring out amphoras of coffee and letters.

"In this time of term papers, I wanted to draw my patron deity, Bullshitticus, god of students and general last-minute fudgery, sitting upon his Golden Futon, attended by the muses Caffeina and Thesaurae, whose powers of artificial energy and pretentious vocabulary can be invoked in case of the all-nighter. I like to think he's Dionysus's second cousin or something."

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 16h

Apparently, all the kids are having a hard time thinking up presents for Middle Kid's birthday. I just asked her fiance for suggestions, and she said she was still trying to figure it out.
She used to be my easiest kid to shop for! 😆

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 17h

*checks my own glasses*
😳

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 17h

And because why not? 💜

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 18h

The way the child in your lap is mugging for the camera reminds me so much of Penultimate Kid! ❤️❤️❤️

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 18h

Four meals so far from that $3.50 pork roast. The last one tomorrow.
Side dishes, about $5 total.

$8.50 ÷ 5 = $1.70 per dinner.

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 18h

Look, those people give grifters a bad name.

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 18h

Far better to have jettisoned them.

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 20h

😆😆😆😶‍🌫️

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 21h

It did interrupt my nap, tho. At least I'd opted for a wee chair nap instead of a full-on, naked in bed nap.

I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 21h

My weed guy just showed up and surprised me. I didn't remember asking for a delivery. I'd been thinking about it but I was going to wait for a couple of weeks.

He looked as confused as me. He was supposed to go to my (good) upstairs neighbor!
🤣
But while you're here, whatcha got?

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 21h

My weed guy just showed up and surprised me. I didn't remember asking for a delivery. I'd been thinking about it but I was going to wait for a couple of weeks.

He looked as confused as me. He was supposed to go to my (good) upstairs neighbor!
🤣
But while you're here, whatcha got?

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 23h

Hmm. Maybe a nap?

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 23h

I just went to the kitchen to get a drink. Now he's yelling at me again.

I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 23h

Bernie, just because I'm home early doesn't mean it's dinner time. It's 2:30.

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I saw dead people but I have an alibi @isamclaren.bsky.social · 23h

My dad said I was never off the top of the road. Always gallivanting.