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Jesus Zoidberg

@jesuszoidberg.bsky.social

3.1K followers 1.1K following 14K posts

"We Will Survive" Long Suffering Philadelphia Sports Fan who once made a funny name that stuck. Master of the Quote Twe..er..Post **Trans lives are human lives** 🐩

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · Apr 7

This is very difficult. Last night our mother passed away suddenly at the age of 67. She was the light of my life, and will always be the voice in my soul. My younger brother has started a GoFundMe to help with the sudden funeral costs. If you can help, great, if not, that's OK.

gofund.me/fc95d9bf

Donate to In loving memory of Sindy Nan Bergman, organized by Steve Bergman

Hello, my name is Steven Bergman. I'll be honest, I'm not sure the best way to wri… Steve Bergman needs your support for In loving memory of Sindy Nan Bergman

gofund.me

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 2h

No, that was the latest game, I was at the 20 inning game vs the Dodgers.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 2h

Teams used to have 10 man staffs. It's just not the same game anymore, and I was at the longest Phillies game in history.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 2h

You're not wrong, and I see the argument is build the rosters different, but we had to get their because bullpen pitchers were just built differently then they were 20-30 years ago, and the syrup isn't going back in the bottle.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 8h

I think the only way Topper isn't the manager is if Boone gets fired and he wants the Yankees job.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 8h

"The folks at the district attorney's office won't believe it, but we have another Son of Sam case going on"

Garfield and Friends Screens @garfieldscreens.bsky.social · 8h

Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

The New Republic @newrepublic.com · 10h

His slip of the tongue reveals who’s really in charge. trib.al/mIvP0yE

“Illinois governor says we’re provoking actions that are unlawful,” Miller said on CNN. “If I put federal law enforcement and National Guard into a nice sleepy Southern town, is anyone gonna riot?”

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 11h

"The condom machine Jon installed in the bathroom really didn't get much use these days".

Garfield and Friends Screens @garfieldscreens.bsky.social · 11h

Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

Noah Becker @noahbecker.bsky.social · 11h

Between 1980 and 2001, the Eagles won the division once. Between 1983 and 2007, the Phillies won the division once. Between 1983 and 2008, Philly teams played in the in one World Series, one Stanley Cup Final, and one NBA Championship (all losses).

Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 11h

I know I sound so old, but you need to understand how much Philadelphia sports was just not only bad, but irrelevant.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 11h

I know I sound so old, but you need to understand how much Philadelphia sports was just not only bad, but irrelevant.

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Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

EidMar @eidmar.bsky.social · 11h

Black Friday in 1977 was much, much worse. A million times worse. I hope to never experience anything like it again.

Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

Jimmy Cigarillos @jimmycigarillos.bsky.social · 11h

From the time I started kindergarten to the time I turned 30 the Phillies made the playoffs one time and were eliminated in traumatic fashion. Painful as this has been, we’ve had a shot every season the last few.

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Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

Jason Hutt @jthutt.bsky.social · 12h

Last weekend, we were sitting across from the banners at the Linc. I pointed out that from 1950 - 2000 they hung 3 banners total. The Flyers last won a cup when I was 1. Beyond the heartbreak of ‘93, the Phillies were a wasteland when I was old enough to care. I’ll take relevance any day.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 12h

Meh, I mean, I grew up with absolute dogshit.

pork, cheese, broccoli rabe @garlicbuffalo.gobirds.biz · 12h

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Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

BigLaz @teamkaos1998.bsky.social · 16h

So snme will take place on earth X with fascists and scumbags in attendance. Fuck tko now and forever. #AbolishICE #FuckWWE #cena

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 12h

His second half was really good.

Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 13h

Rhymes with the word Millies.

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 13h

Yeah, I'm sure it's going to be something in the next CBA.

Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

Matt the Dad @suboptimaldad.gobirds.online · 13h

If this guy also ends up with the Dodgers feels like MLB will need to institute some sort of soccer-esque maximum "guys straight from another professional league" per team rule

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Jesus Zoidberg @jesuszoidberg.bsky.social · 13h

And obviously, the Phillies need to better on the margins. They had $22.5 million dedicated to Kepler, Romano, and Ross.

Reposted by Jesus Zoidberg

Shawn Foss @shawnfoss.bsky.social · 14h

The entire Cubs' pen is just one story after another of guys who just having career renaissances out of nowhere:

Thielbar had a 5.32 ERA last year

Brad Keller hadn't posted a sub-4.00 ERA since 2020

Palencia finally putting it together

The work they've gotten from Civale

And on & on