Jonbenét Rumsfeld aka The Gobbler
@jonbenetrumsfeld.blacksky.app
🇵🇸
butlerian jihad extremist
lil orphan despot™️
mother goosy goose
theres a specter haunting the usa *rips huge loud wet fart*
butlerian jihad extremist
lil orphan despot™️
mother goosy goose
theres a specter haunting the usa *rips huge loud wet fart*
Pinned
jorts.horse
@jonbenetrumsfeld invites you to join this server of Mastodon! With an account, you will be able to follow people, post updates and exchange messages with users from any Mastodon server and more!
jorts.horse
the piss de la creme of shitposting
the only server you need
plus me
the only server you need
plus me
k y s
November 26, 2025 at 3:57 AM
k y s
i worked at a bakery all throughout undergrad
he speaks no lies
he speaks no lies
Actually, all pie is good. Cake, however, runs the gamut from absolute ecstasy to utter dogshit.
November 26, 2025 at 2:50 AM
i worked at a bakery all throughout undergrad
he speaks no lies
he speaks no lies
Reposted by Jonbenét Rumsfeld aka The Gobbler
Social media is so completely unserious and irrelevant. Anyone still unironically thinking there is a canonically correct way to exist online is full of shit.
November 26, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Social media is so completely unserious and irrelevant. Anyone still unironically thinking there is a canonically correct way to exist online is full of shit.
okay so apparently i need to edumacate yall on what a vinegar pie is
November 26, 2025 at 1:26 AM
okay so apparently i need to edumacate yall on what a vinegar pie is
will stancil cuck chair™️
November 26, 2025 at 12:49 AM
will stancil cuck chair™️
what are our thoughts on vinegar pie
November 26, 2025 at 12:18 AM
what are our thoughts on vinegar pie
shifting into gobbler mode
November 26, 2025 at 12:04 AM
shifting into gobbler mode
all pies matter
November 25, 2025 at 11:27 PM
all pies matter
applying for the atomic priesthood
November 25, 2025 at 9:51 PM
applying for the atomic priesthood
you redacted my name from all the files right dr kapp
November 25, 2025 at 9:45 PM
you redacted my name from all the files right dr kapp
shes a 10 but hollers man the torpedoes when inserting a tampon
He’s a 10 but yells ‘fire in the hole’ when he climaxes
November 25, 2025 at 8:54 PM
shes a 10 but hollers man the torpedoes when inserting a tampon
i fucking hate thanksgiving
weak ass holiday where you panic cook for two days and the meal lasts like what
30 minutes
and then its a fuckton of clean up finding space for everything
gawd i hate it
weak ass holiday where you panic cook for two days and the meal lasts like what
30 minutes
and then its a fuckton of clean up finding space for everything
gawd i hate it
November 25, 2025 at 8:47 PM
i fucking hate thanksgiving
weak ass holiday where you panic cook for two days and the meal lasts like what
30 minutes
and then its a fuckton of clean up finding space for everything
gawd i hate it
weak ass holiday where you panic cook for two days and the meal lasts like what
30 minutes
and then its a fuckton of clean up finding space for everything
gawd i hate it
describes my husband to a t or whatever
Eat Spaghetti Bolognese In Bed From A Tiny Bowl With Your Fingers It's 8:00PM
November 25, 2025 at 8:02 PM
describes my husband to a t or whatever
youre a cocksucker
mr grinch
mr grinch
November 25, 2025 at 7:58 PM
youre a cocksucker
mr grinch
mr grinch
i think wv is just happy everyone else is gonna be broke like them
im from WV so its okay for me to make the jokes but not you
im from WV so its okay for me to make the jokes but not you
Trump’s approval collapses nationwide, turning several deep-red states negative — Economist tracker
November 25, 2025 at 7:25 PM
i think wv is just happy everyone else is gonna be broke like them
im from WV so its okay for me to make the jokes but not you
im from WV so its okay for me to make the jokes but not you
ronnie rocket
directed by kojima
directed by kojima
If you were a despotic president, what movie would you force Hollywood to make? I want to see Quentin's Star Trek movie or maybe Kill Bill Vol 3.
November 25, 2025 at 7:06 PM
ronnie rocket
directed by kojima
directed by kojima
casting all ai fears aside for the moment
i always felt
if i encountered a self aware robot of some sort
i think wed be friends
because wed have a lot in common
id like to be best friends with a robot someday
i always felt
if i encountered a self aware robot of some sort
i think wed be friends
because wed have a lot in common
id like to be best friends with a robot someday
November 25, 2025 at 6:38 PM
casting all ai fears aside for the moment
i always felt
if i encountered a self aware robot of some sort
i think wed be friends
because wed have a lot in common
id like to be best friends with a robot someday
i always felt
if i encountered a self aware robot of some sort
i think wed be friends
because wed have a lot in common
id like to be best friends with a robot someday
hey jon
you and garfield want to watch nancy
gock gock the gipper
you and garfield want to watch nancy
gock gock the gipper
November 25, 2025 at 6:22 PM
hey jon
you and garfield want to watch nancy
gock gock the gipper
you and garfield want to watch nancy
gock gock the gipper
post your warning label
November 25, 2025 at 5:54 PM
post your warning label
Reposted by Jonbenét Rumsfeld aka The Gobbler
"Okay, sure he was a fascist. But, at least, he made sure the planes didn't run on time."
November 25, 2025 at 5:31 PM
"Okay, sure he was a fascist. But, at least, he made sure the planes didn't run on time."
elvis aloha from epstein island
November 25, 2025 at 5:26 PM
elvis aloha from epstein island
"Use only ONE piece of art to convince folks to follow you"
okay okay fine you assholes want to see what i went to college for okay fine
okay okay fine you assholes want to see what i went to college for okay fine
November 25, 2025 at 4:49 PM
"Use only ONE piece of art to convince folks to follow you"
okay okay fine you assholes want to see what i went to college for okay fine
okay okay fine you assholes want to see what i went to college for okay fine
sweet summer child
implies the existence of
bitter winter bastard
implies the existence of
bitter winter bastard
November 25, 2025 at 4:23 PM
sweet summer child
implies the existence of
bitter winter bastard
implies the existence of
bitter winter bastard