Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

C. Robert Cargill

@crobertcargill.bsky.social

Remember kids, in the year of our Lord 2026, if you see someone stealing food, NO YOU FUCKING DIDN’T

So someone was unsuccessful in trying to steal $300 worth of food from a business owned by the Sobey family (net worth $5.5 billion), and the cops thought it warranted a news release

Saanich Police are asking for the public’s help to identify a suspect who allegedly attempted to steal more than $300 worth of meat from a grocery store in the 3400 block of Quadra Street.

Police say the incident occurred when a man attempted to leave the store with the unpaid items but was stopped by security. The suspect then fled the store before police arrived.

January 2, 2026 at 12:49 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Ken Jennings

@kenjennings.bsky.social

Just found out my teen tried to name a horse “Gary” in RDR but mistyped and now has a horse named “Fart.” Happy new year!

January 2, 2026 at 2:15 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Jerry Chen

@jcsalterego.bsky.social

they should invent a kitchen trash you can take out that is less than 106.8% full

December 31, 2025 at 12:41 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Outbursts Of Everett True

@everetttrue.bsky.social

The Atlantic City Sunday Gazette
December 30,1917

Outbursts Of Everett True By A.D. Condo
P1-
THE MAN WORKING NEXT TO EVERETT:
HEY EVERETT! ( THEN PROCEEDS TO MUMBLE SOMETHING UNINTELLIGIBLE,THEN FINISHED WITH YESTERDAY!)

EVERETT: WHAT? ( HOLDING A HAND TO HIS EAR)

P2-MAN: "WHAT?"
DO I LOOK
LIKE A "WHAT"?

P3- EVERETT HAS GOTTEN TIRED OF THIS AND ANSWERED THE MAN BY THROWING A CHAIR AND HITTING THE MAN IN THE HEAD WITH IT.

December 31, 2025 at 12:31 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

The Breakdown AB

@thebreakdownab.bsky.social

What's going on in healthcare?

We've got our first op-ed on our substack written by the host himself taking a look!

#abpoli #ableg #cdnpoli

open.substack.com/pub/thebreak...

Op-Ed - Alberta's Healthcare Crisis

And what to do about it...

open.substack.com

December 29, 2025 at 7:16 PM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Outbursts Of Everett True

@everetttrue.bsky.social

The Port Huron Times Herald
December 28,1915

Outbursts Of Everett True By A.D.Condo
P1- EVERETT IS ASKING TWO CHILDREN ABOUT THEIR CHRISTMAS

EVERETT :GOOD MORNING, CHILDREN - WHAT DID SANTA CLAUS BRING YOU FOR CHRISTMAS?

CHILDREN: OH WE DON'T BELIEVE IN SANDY, MISTER GREEN TELLED US
THEY ISN'T NO SANDY CLAUS

P2- EVERETT IS VERY DISTURBED BY WHAT THE CHILDREN HAVE TOLD HIM.

EVERETT: THERE'S
THAT FELLOW GREEN I'VE
BEEN LOOKING FOR ALL-MORNING!!

EVERETT IS GOING TO HAVE A FRANK DISCUSSION WITH MR. GREEN.

EVERETT APPEARS TO BE REACHING DOWN TO PICK UP A WOOD 2x4 OFF OF THE GROUND…

December 29, 2025 at 3:04 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Allison Gale

@mayladyagh.bsky.social

Hey Stephen Goebbels Miller... your love of Frank Sinatra's "whiteness" should see this, too. You're an ignorant racist son of a b**ch.

youtube.com/shorts/Ue_j5...

Frank Sinatra Teaches Kids About Religious Tolerance - The House I Live In (1945)

YouTube video by Mass Ave Videos

youtube.com

December 28, 2025 at 12:08 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

LithiumChaser

@lithiumchaser.bsky.social

Hedy Lamarr by Clarence Sinclair Bull (1940)

December 29, 2025 at 1:25 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Aaron Meyers

@aaronmeyers.bsky.social

“Can you help me buy this game? It’s $14.99”
What’s it called?
“Job simulator”

I laughed for 5min.

December 28, 2025 at 2:00 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

derek guy

@dieworkwear.bsky.social

i love furniture restoration videos because they show how quality is important and you can get some really beautiful, overlooked furniture if you learn certain skills

IG savedbydesign.tn

December 28, 2025 at 4:42 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Ashley

@ashleysays.bsky.social

I could never be a quarterback because I would stuff the kicker who misses into lockers. Like I just killed myself going 90 yards and you can’t make the extra point? IN YOU GO, NERD

December 28, 2025 at 12:29 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Andre Son of Mogh

@hausofmogh.bsky.social

Me when the movie I paid money to rent drops on streaming the next day.

FFS 🤦🏽

a man in a white shirt is talking to another man in a black shirt .

ALT: a man in a white shirt is talking to another man in a black shirt .

media.tenor.com

December 26, 2025 at 7:28 PM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

priscilla page

@priscillapage.bsky.social

lotta good stuff here obviously but The Long Goodbye + Night Moves is an inspired, perfect double feature

New Beverly Cinema @newbeverly.bsky.social · 10d

Kick off the new year with a movie at the New Bev, where it’s always on film! Share with friends and let us know what you're most excited to see.

December 24, 2025 at 2:11 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Ken Jennings

@kenjennings.bsky.social

I have some bad news for Latke.

December 24, 2025 at 1:49 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Bronze Age Babies

@bronzeagebabies.bsky.social

Speaking of rejected covers (see my previous post), I found this fun series of images on @tytempleton.bsky.social’s blog. Check it out for more cool stuff!

tytempletonart.wordpress.com/2011/05/19/u...

Batman and Robin Adventures 7 (1996) published cover. The Ventriloquist has a pistol to Scarface’s head.

Batman and Robin Adventures 7 (1996) unpublished cover. The Ventriloquist (1/4 turn) has a pistol to Scarface’s head.

Batman and Robin Adventures 7 (1996) unpublished cover. The Ventriloquist and Scarface hide around a corner from a searching Batman and Robin.

Batman and Robin Adventures 7 (1996) unpublished cover. The Ventriloquist holds Scarface, who wields a tommy gun.

December 23, 2025 at 3:51 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Krista D. Ball: Canada's Snarky Potato

@kristadb1.bsky.social

Please note I take the 60 Minutes censorship situation very seriously, I am very concerned for my American friends.

And I also laughed out loud at this:

Canada says we want you to know it was us

December 23, 2025 at 1:39 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

derek guy

@dieworkwear.bsky.social

One day something will happen — a wedding, a graduation, a job promotion, Jake Paul getting knocked out, Andrew Tate getting knocked out the next day — and you’ll want the right outfit to celebrate. Buy that special outfit now, so you’re ready when that next unexpected moment arrives.

December 21, 2025 at 7:19 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Outbursts Of Everett True

@everetttrue.bsky.social

The Salina Daily Union
Salina Kansas
December 20,1917

Outbursts Of Everett True By A.D. Condo
P1- EVERETT IS IN THE LINE AT THE THEATER WHEN THE MAN BEHIND HIM BEGINS TO COUGH WITHOUT COVERING HIS FACE… KAW HAW! KAW HOOP!

P2- EVERETT : SO YOU WOULD
GO INTO THIS THEATER WITH YOUR BAD COLD AND SPREAD THE INFECTION, AND SPOIL THE ENTERTAINMENT WITH YOUR COUGH THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE BARKING OF A SEA LION!! THE OPEN AIR FOR YOU!!!

EVERETT GRABS THE MAN BY THE SHOULDERS AND ESCORTS HIM OUT OF THE THEATER, BUT BY THE LOOKS OF THE MANS MASHED HAT, EVERETT MUST HAVE KNOCKED HIM ON THE TOP OF HIS HEAD BEFORE SHOWING HIM TO THE STREET

December 21, 2025 at 3:50 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

Outbursts Of Everett True

@everetttrue.bsky.social

The San Diego Sun
Thursday, December 19,1918

Outbursts Of Everett True By A.D. Condo
P1- EVERETT HAS JUST ENTERED THE OFFICE OF THE MAN WHO IS THE OWNER OF THE HOUSE HE RENTS FROM

EVERETT PROMPTLY GRABS THE MAN BY THE SHOULDERS AND PULLS HIM OVER HIS DESK

EVERETT: GOOD MORNING
SiR! I WON'T WASTE MUCH OF YOUR TIME! YOU've PROMISED
SEVERAL TIMES TO HAVE THOSE REPAIRS MADE ON THE HOUSE WE RENT OF YOU, AND

P2-

EVERETT : I WAS GOING TO WRITE YOU A LETTER ABOUT IT TODAY, BUT I DECIDED THAT A PERSONAL INTERVIEW WOULD BE MORE LIKELY TO GET SOME ACTION!!!

EVERETT LEAVES THE OFFICE, THE MANS DESK IS TURNED OVER AND HE IS ON THE FLOOR ,STARS FLOATING AROUND HIS HEAD.

December 20, 2025 at 2:39 AM

Reposted by Mitchell Dean

C. Robert Cargill

@crobertcargill.bsky.social

I've famously told this story on podcasts a number of times, but I met Gil Gerard as a kid at a celebrity tennis tournament and he tried to pick up my mom right in front of me. Was I mad? No. Buck Rogers tried to fuck my mom, which is the most Buck Rogers thing he could do. Lived up to the legend.

December 17, 2025 at 4:12 AM