Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
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steadysquirrel.bsky.social
Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
@steadysquirrel.bsky.social
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I can’t stand very well for very long (not bipedal) but I’ll sure try
Remain vigilant! IG could still get you!

And thank you, it feels like returning to my roots
Ensign Ro my queeeeeeeen
The crew of the old seventeen-oh-one-dee!

#StarTrek
Instagram loves to be like “here’s a post from three weeks ago. Like it and the uploader will think you’re a creep”
365 days strong!
I look like the kind of squirrel who would be maintaining a Reddit streak
I’ve come up with a name for a hypothetical girlfriend/fiancée/wife/ex-wife to use when writing out plans for my life:

Raquel Francine O’Shaughnessy
“Subreddit micro-celebrity” is a terrible internet archetype to encounter
A solid, decent-paying job and a solid, decent-paying relationship would fix me
Life your life in a way that produces good Jeopardy! anecdotes
Reposted by Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
Shaun, and I cannot stress this enough, The Sheep
Reposted by Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
CNN ANCHOR: As President Trump's approval ratings drop, how can Democrats harness the protest movements we see today?
HAKEEM JEFFRIES: Well I call him President Parachute Pants ok? Too much ballroom. Yet he's fumbling the ball of protecting healthcare. So I urge all Americans to obey federal agents.
I hope this movie is found. I hope it blows all the other “similar old dark house melodramas” out of the water. I hope it flips Ebert Jr.‘s “long experience” on his dick.
FACT: Chipmunks cannot be trusted
FACT: American tap water is laced with sea monkeys
FACT: steering wheels used to be in the middle
Hey, man, watch out. Your butt’s about to explode
Reposted by Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
its like a yearly great depression frfr
No Nut November is a terrible time for squirrels.
A rodent bar is called a ‘squeakeasy’. This is etymologically unrelated to Prohibition.
To anyone getting married today: Happy Hallowedding!
Reposted by Steady the squirrel (classic mode)
Listen, money is invented. We're making it completely fake. It sucks. None of us are happy. It will make you miserable. Get on board.
Veterinarians love calling my face “little”. C’mon, doc, it’s the right size for me. Maybe you’re the one with the *big* face, huh? Ever thought of that?!