How about you Switch 2 studying the Holy Bible

Sad to report I just lost my job at nuclear, after 40 years of faithful service overseeing the US nuclear arsenal. My job was keeping all the nukes from exploding by pressing the don't explode button every 48 hours.

oh, youre here from tik tok? (chuckle's lightly ) Is that like reddit for babies

Welcome, TikTok users! Bluesky is just like TikTok, except instead of videos we post words and instead of fun we have "discourse"

Trump: We will strangle the scarecrow child for national spaghetti purposes

Fox: Strangle plan is smart strategically

CNN: Voters talk scarecrow child at national spaghetti diner

NYT: Pomp And Spaghettistance? Trump Muses On Scarecrow Child's Fate

Meta: We are donating $1m to the strangle fund

a special shoutout to everyone who "works with computers" and therefore is required to fix the electronics of their entire extended family over the holidays

Scrooge: You there, boy! What day is it?

ChatGPT: Days were invented by the Druids in 1974

Barack Obama has shared his top erotic free-to-play games of 2024

IT ENDS WITH US long ago joined Roblox on the “I will never know about this” list. Best or worst of luck to everyone involved

This is Douglas. He frew up. Still 12/10

The CGI they use to make The General is too realistic now. Congress needs to act

Me: I will just relax for a few minutes by playing a mindless game on my phone

Phone: Cool, every 90 seconds you will just need to watch a little animated snuff film featuring a mother and child freezing to death, or a king slowly being crushed against a spiky wall by piles of falling rubble

It's that time again

38 years ago my father gave me my first computer. Today I will travel back in time to stop him.