As I said to Onion members:

"We’re an independent company, we don’t use AI to write headlines and make art, and we’re one of roughly three publications who are up for the fight. Unlike other places, The Onion is quadrupling down on being a pain in the ass, politically."

So help out! Grab a paper.

I'm trying to think about how I would have reacted if shown this headline five years ago

Cackling NPR Host Warns Upcoming Segment May Feature Content Too Dark, Too Chilling, Too Positively Ghoulish For Young Listeners theonion.com/cacklin...

If Jesus had focused more on kitchen table issues and less on unpopular outcasts like lepers and prostitutes, he might have won more support from white working-class Judeans.

It's genuinely hard to express to sort of normal not politically plugged in non-lawyers *how* lawless the Trump administration is, and I think that's some part of the problem.

You sound like you're hyperventilating, but it's just a flat description of what is going on.

The fight going on in the Democratic Party right now is not between hard left, left and moderate. It’s between those who want to fight and those who want to cave. And Team Fight stretches across all ideological aspects of the Party. Misread this at your own peril.

i am sick of “more monkeys jumping on the bed” discourse. it’s as though these people have no memory of 2017 when one fell off and bumped his head. doctor spoke out against it, mama endorsed doctor’s findings. i’m limiting replies to followers because i do not have the energy for YMMJOTBers today

every news cycle for the next four years is just going to be

Monday: Trump has fired all the people who were responsible for keeping poo out of the drinking water

Tuesday: okay for some reason there is now a lot of poo in the drinking water