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NY Times Pitchbot
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If Adolf Hitler flew in today, they’d send a limousine anyway. Parody. Merch: https://tinyurl.com/msjjmwpt
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No Tyrants No Kings Men's T Shirt
Stand up and say NO.
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ICE, which I do not support, should be able to stop citizens from voting in November the same way that M$DNC shitlibs banned me from Maddow for praising Donald Trump, who I do not support.

by Glenn Grenwald
February 3, 2026 at 5:21 PM
Opinion | If you're not in the Epstein files, you're a nobody.
February 3, 2026 at 4:32 PM
lol
February 3, 2026 at 4:23 PM
Melinda and Melinda

Broadway Billy Gates is hottest nerd since Woody, but his visit to a Russian Aphrodite on the sweet and lowdown turned into a bad sex comedy. Why would a rational man hatch a bananas plan to keep husbands and wives from sharing an STD? I'm almost afraid to ask.

by Maureen Dowd
February 3, 2026 at 4:08 PM
Reposted by NY Times Pitchbot
It’s now woke to be against going to Epstein island and creating nonconsensual sexual content of kids

Welcome to woke 2, everyone. The mind virus lives.
February 3, 2026 at 12:20 PM
Every CBS News contributor who appears in Epstein files as a character from Game of Thrones.

by Chris Cillizza
February 3, 2026 at 5:17 AM
My three-year-old was watching the Melania documentary when she turned to me gravely and asked "Daddy, why do the shitlibs hate the nice first lady so much?" And when I told her "Because the woke mind virus has made them knee-jerk liberal partisans," she started crying.
February 3, 2026 at 5:11 AM
Standing up to Trump worked for Harvard. Here's why it never would have worked at Columbia.
February 3, 2026 at 3:46 AM
In this Ohio diner, Attia still means the index theorem and the book on commutative algebra. But they do know this: if the woke mob won't let an Epstein associate spread anti-vaccine misinformation on a major network every Whiskey Friday, then freedom really is dead.
February 3, 2026 at 3:35 AM
Trump changed his tone. How much longer do centrist pundits have to pretend to care about ICE killing and imprisoning people at random?
February 3, 2026 at 3:32 AM
There is no strict Constitutional prohibition against pedophilia so it’s hard for me to understand the woke left’s obsession with the Epstein files.

by Jonathan Turley
February 3, 2026 at 12:35 AM
Trump's secret police are roaming our streets, killing and maiming with impunity. But I read an article in the Atlantic about kids at an elite university complaining about their dining hall. I have never felt more politically homeless.
February 2, 2026 at 8:01 PM
The fact that there was significant public push-back against the murder of two protesters by Trump's secret police shows that our democracy is still strong and resilient.
February 2, 2026 at 7:59 PM
By releasing the Epstein files with so little redaction, the DOJ has jeopardized the privacy and well-being of Epstein's real victims—the elderly billionaires who sent him embarrassing emails about treating STDs.
February 2, 2026 at 4:55 PM
Whether it's Donald Trump getting half a billion dollars from United Arab Emirates or Joe Biden getting free ice cream from a shop in Delaware, influence peddling has been a problem for both men.
February 2, 2026 at 4:52 PM
Donald Trump's inability to control bowel movements raises new questions about Joe Biden's advanced age.
February 2, 2026 at 3:22 PM
Whether it's Hillary Clinton writing "pls print" 35 times in emails on a private server or Donald Trump being mentioned 38,000 times in the emails of a notorious sex trafficker, both candidates had a fraught relationship with electronic communication.
February 2, 2026 at 4:17 AM
Dems in Disarray
February 2, 2026 at 4:14 AM
Many on the left are cheering Democrats' hardline stance against increasing funding for ICE. But Holden Paddon-Park, who works as a kombucha sommelier at a Silver Lake vegan tapas bar and identifies as a liberal, says that their aggressive approach leaves him deeply uneasy.
February 2, 2026 at 3:49 AM
I'm a liberal who attends anti-Trump protests. I loved the Melania documentary.
February 2, 2026 at 3:31 AM
Trump's secret police force are shooting and imprisoning innocent Americans. Not everyone is happy.
February 2, 2026 at 3:25 AM
Reposted by NY Times Pitchbot
Bari Weiss attended a fundraiser last night in NYC, attendee tells me. There was an auction item for dinner with her and wife Nellie Bowles. Several people cheered in approval, many others said after how gross it was. Bari shouted out “And you can make out with Nellie!” It ultimately sold for $55k.
February 1, 2026 at 6:04 PM
Breaking character: how about some merch with Radical Wine Mom written on it?
February 1, 2026 at 7:21 PM
Reposted by NY Times Pitchbot
Each Epstein email has so many layers of slime people miss some. This email is Ken Starr, fired for covering up sexual assault, offering to help his former client Jeffrey Epstein's friend's sexual harassment charges by introducing him to Jed Rubenfeld, later put on leave for sexual misconduct. 1/
November 13, 2025 at 3:25 AM
The real winner of the Tarrant County special election? Florida governor, Ron DeSantis.
February 1, 2026 at 3:56 PM