@calmdownlizzi.bsky.social
Just out here foraging the interwebs for joy. 💚
On god, yesterday my son asked me if ranch dressing came from plants he had seen that had white sap.
March 30, 2025 at 7:08 PM
On god, yesterday my son asked me if ranch dressing came from plants he had seen that had white sap.
I think my autistic trait is that I never drink the last drank of coffee in my cup. I just… don’t trust it to the last drop.
March 13, 2025 at 11:47 PM
I think my autistic trait is that I never drink the last drank of coffee in my cup. I just… don’t trust it to the last drop.
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I’m about to be out here smoking a whole Pan-flute of vapes at once. IT’S BASICALLY MEDICINE.
March 8, 2025 at 7:48 AM
I’m about to be out here smoking a whole Pan-flute of vapes at once. IT’S BASICALLY MEDICINE.
How did Prince flirt? He put the mauves on em. Thank you and good night.
March 7, 2025 at 11:54 PM
How did Prince flirt? He put the mauves on em. Thank you and good night.
Diablo’s March of the Goblins is the closest thing to a Religious Holiday I practice these days. And it’s frigggin magical, yall.
March 4, 2025 at 6:59 AM
Diablo’s March of the Goblins is the closest thing to a Religious Holiday I practice these days. And it’s frigggin magical, yall.
I don’t know if more or less caffeine would serve me best right now. WELP, always better to bet it’s more…
February 9, 2025 at 7:51 AM
I don’t know if more or less caffeine would serve me best right now. WELP, always better to bet it’s more…
Long ago… I was on break at a book store with an elderly Scottish coworker. Her accent was entertaining bc we lived in Mississippi. So anyway she offhandedly said, “They scheduled me agAIn for some rrrandom-arse reason!” And for some reason that has never stopped cracking me up.
February 7, 2025 at 8:03 PM
Long ago… I was on break at a book store with an elderly Scottish coworker. Her accent was entertaining bc we lived in Mississippi. So anyway she offhandedly said, “They scheduled me agAIn for some rrrandom-arse reason!” And for some reason that has never stopped cracking me up.
I’m playing with Leonardo ai generator. Input a pic of Poppy (she is half pug and half corgi) and the prompt “a pug making waffles”… and yall… it is real crazy to see your pet staring at you from the wrong exterior. 😅
February 6, 2025 at 5:51 PM
I’m playing with Leonardo ai generator. Input a pic of Poppy (she is half pug and half corgi) and the prompt “a pug making waffles”… and yall… it is real crazy to see your pet staring at you from the wrong exterior. 😅
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attempting to describe the vibes of the moment. have yet to do better than: "imagine watching a documentary reenacting the burning of the Library of Alexandria set to the soundtrack of 'Yakety Sax'"
February 6, 2025 at 3:59 AM
attempting to describe the vibes of the moment. have yet to do better than: "imagine watching a documentary reenacting the burning of the Library of Alexandria set to the soundtrack of 'Yakety Sax'"
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Why are they called young, well-mannered, twentysomething men and not Gent Zs?
February 6, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Why are they called young, well-mannered, twentysomething men and not Gent Zs?
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🌊⛈️🌊According to medieval lore, Tempestarii were Weather Witches who possessed the power to summon up or calm storms.
#WyrdWednesday #LegendaryWednesday #FolkloreThursday #FolkyFriday #FolkloreSunday
#WyrdWednesday #LegendaryWednesday #FolkloreThursday #FolkyFriday #FolkloreSunday
February 5, 2025 at 4:55 PM
🌊⛈️🌊According to medieval lore, Tempestarii were Weather Witches who possessed the power to summon up or calm storms.
#WyrdWednesday #LegendaryWednesday #FolkloreThursday #FolkyFriday #FolkloreSunday
#WyrdWednesday #LegendaryWednesday #FolkloreThursday #FolkyFriday #FolkloreSunday
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February 5, 2025 at 6:05 PM
Reposted
It’s easy to think of all government spending as inherently wasteful if your definition of waste is “money that I don’t get to have, personally”
February 6, 2025 at 4:25 PM
It’s easy to think of all government spending as inherently wasteful if your definition of waste is “money that I don’t get to have, personally”
The Goodest Boy
As the song on the radio played, Arnold couldn’t help but wonder if this poor Taylor Swift girl would ever find true happiness. He made a mental note to send her one of his tennis balls when he got home.
February 6, 2025 at 4:29 PM
The Goodest Boy
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Why did they call it a bayonet and not a knifle
February 5, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Why did they call it a bayonet and not a knifle
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every day we see more and more evidence of society descending into utter lawlessness and chaos
February 6, 2025 at 12:32 PM
every day we see more and more evidence of society descending into utter lawlessness and chaos
I found the actual largest hat in all the land.
February 4, 2025 at 11:41 AM
I found the actual largest hat in all the land.
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I can’t believe I’m only just now watching St. Denis. I guess I thought it would be sad but it’s hilarious annnnd amazing. Lots of the people from Superstore.
February 2, 2025 at 7:02 PM
I can’t believe I’m only just now watching St. Denis. I guess I thought it would be sad but it’s hilarious annnnd amazing. Lots of the people from Superstore.
Reposted
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Chick-Fil-A Raptured
theonion.com/chick-f...
theonion.com/chick-f...
Chick-Fil-A Raptured
ATLANTA—In a harrowing fulfillment of biblical prophecy that left customers screaming as their fast food orders disappeared before their eyes, panicked sources reported Tuesday that every Chick-fil-A store had been raptured. The massive heavenly event began at 12:02 p.m. EST when a large burst of God’s divine light shot down from the clouds and slowly […]
theonion.com
February 1, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Chick-Fil-A Raptured
theonion.com/chick-f...
theonion.com/chick-f...