Pinned
spoocecow
@important.website
· Mar 6
Haha, wouldn't it be funny if... you know what, nevermind. Nevermind about everything. Never mind about my whole life. [dissipates into the wind]
Reposted by spoocecow
Going to use this thread to repost some of my most popular posts and "greatest hits" from the h*ellsite. I've got plenty of other gems coming shortly! (1/?) 🧶
December 1, 2024 at 1:10 AM
Going to use this thread to repost some of my most popular posts and "greatest hits" from the h*ellsite. I've got plenty of other gems coming shortly! (1/?) 🧶
Hello sir, I-- *infinitely spawning briefcases which infinitely spawn jellybeans*
December 1, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Hello sir, I-- *infinitely spawning briefcases which infinitely spawn jellybeans*
phoning into CSPAN to ominously intone "the KNIFEwielders wield the MACHINES" in a Zorak voice
November 30, 2025 at 10:28 PM
phoning into CSPAN to ominously intone "the KNIFEwielders wield the MACHINES" in a Zorak voice
The year is 2555 AD. The Vibram Syndicate has taken total control of the new world order. All shoes must have Vibram soles. Feet must always be contained in shoes. Newborns have shoes assigned to them at birth. Mankind has not known the pleasures of bare feet in centuries. Their only hope... 1/2
November 29, 2025 at 2:47 AM
The year is 2555 AD. The Vibram Syndicate has taken total control of the new world order. All shoes must have Vibram soles. Feet must always be contained in shoes. Newborns have shoes assigned to them at birth. Mankind has not known the pleasures of bare feet in centuries. Their only hope... 1/2
I medically require a butler
November 28, 2025 at 11:52 PM
I medically require a butler
Reposted by spoocecow
inventing a fun new game where you get really wasted and put all your kitchen knives on the floor with the lights off. i call it Scary Floor
November 20, 2025 at 2:50 AM
inventing a fun new game where you get really wasted and put all your kitchen knives on the floor with the lights off. i call it Scary Floor
Top 3 Genie Wishes To Fix All Problems:
3. Every Volcano Erupts At Once
2. Glass Can Never Break Again
1. All Buildings Are Now Alive
3. Every Volcano Erupts At Once
2. Glass Can Never Break Again
1. All Buildings Are Now Alive
November 27, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Top 3 Genie Wishes To Fix All Problems:
3. Every Volcano Erupts At Once
2. Glass Can Never Break Again
1. All Buildings Are Now Alive
3. Every Volcano Erupts At Once
2. Glass Can Never Break Again
1. All Buildings Are Now Alive
ISO: deranged great ape to pull my throat out ($100 OBO)
November 26, 2025 at 6:17 PM
ISO: deranged great ape to pull my throat out ($100 OBO)
my proposed theme park with 11 rides all named "Ass Surprise" has received $0 USD in funding. however, one of my other proposed theme parks with 12 rides all named "Ass Surprise" has received $100,000,000,000 USD in "funnding (sp?)"
November 25, 2025 at 12:27 AM
my proposed theme park with 11 rides all named "Ass Surprise" has received $0 USD in funding. however, one of my other proposed theme parks with 12 rides all named "Ass Surprise" has received $100,000,000,000 USD in "funnding (sp?)"
Just invented "Oppa Gangnam Style"
November 22, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Just invented "Oppa Gangnam Style"
I cannot believe how close I flew to the sun, completely on accident
November 22, 2025 at 7:27 PM
I cannot believe how close I flew to the sun, completely on accident
[beastie boys]
I'M
THE
STINKIEST man on christmas EVE
I'M
THE
STINKIEST man on christmas EVE
November 22, 2025 at 2:40 PM
[beastie boys]
I'M
THE
STINKIEST man on christmas EVE
I'M
THE
STINKIEST man on christmas EVE
The worst dread you can ever feel is being alone somewhere late, not a soul in sight, and then you just suddenly get the feeling that somewhere behind you, you are being watched, and approached, by Engagement Bait
November 20, 2025 at 1:26 PM
The worst dread you can ever feel is being alone somewhere late, not a soul in sight, and then you just suddenly get the feeling that somewhere behind you, you are being watched, and approached, by Engagement Bait
Martin, famous pig, leaving weird and shitty footnotes in the margins of new novel. I thought pigs couldn't read or write in English. Did Martin ever even exist...?
November 19, 2025 at 5:26 AM
Martin, famous pig, leaving weird and shitty footnotes in the margins of new novel. I thought pigs couldn't read or write in English. Did Martin ever even exist...?
Mark Z. Danielewski's new novel of beautiful wonderful innocent pigs finding themselves in a labyrinthine pen whose dimensions violate euclidean physics. The pigs do not know fear and nothing happens to them :) More pen space for my great lovely pigs to roam :)
November 19, 2025 at 5:23 AM
Mark Z. Danielewski's new novel of beautiful wonderful innocent pigs finding themselves in a labyrinthine pen whose dimensions violate euclidean physics. The pigs do not know fear and nothing happens to them :) More pen space for my great lovely pigs to roam :)
A wonderful lovely baby pig, aka piglet, looking back at the raucous crowd of humans as it wordlessly descends into the underground labyrinths
November 19, 2025 at 5:19 AM
A wonderful lovely baby pig, aka piglet, looking back at the raucous crowd of humans as it wordlessly descends into the underground labyrinths
SCOOP: All of the world's brightest & most favored piglets have voluntarily succumbed to "the call of the void" and returned to the presumed center of the earth via heretofore undiscovered caverns, fissures, and chasms. BREAKING: This is True
November 19, 2025 at 5:14 AM
SCOOP: All of the world's brightest & most favored piglets have voluntarily succumbed to "the call of the void" and returned to the presumed center of the earth via heretofore undiscovered caverns, fissures, and chasms. BREAKING: This is True
Martin, "The World's Favorite Piglet", Reaches Terminal Velocity For 18 Harrowing Hours After Falling Into Impossibly Deep Pit
November 19, 2025 at 5:08 AM
Martin, "The World's Favorite Piglet", Reaches Terminal Velocity For 18 Harrowing Hours After Falling Into Impossibly Deep Pit
Martin, "The World's Most Pleasant Piglet", Silently Plummets Into Vast And Impossibly Dark Hole
November 18, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Martin, "The World's Most Pleasant Piglet", Silently Plummets Into Vast And Impossibly Dark Hole
They say it's good to get diagnoses, to know your enemy, etc., and so I am thrilled beyond words to announce that I have recently diagnosed the ultimate source of my defects and failures as none other than the devious supervillain Giovanni Qobras
November 17, 2025 at 11:25 PM
They say it's good to get diagnoses, to know your enemy, etc., and so I am thrilled beyond words to announce that I have recently diagnosed the ultimate source of my defects and failures as none other than the devious supervillain Giovanni Qobras
I've decided to get really mad at my Cuticles. They are going to betray me. I know it.
November 17, 2025 at 1:33 AM
I've decided to get really mad at my Cuticles. They are going to betray me. I know it.
My fingers are warm now. I was having a little episode where my fingers were not warm, and it caused me to post some stuff. I stand by and do not disown the stuff; this is just to say I have eaten some fuckin plums baby wahahaha!!!!
November 14, 2025 at 3:16 AM
My fingers are warm now. I was having a little episode where my fingers were not warm, and it caused me to post some stuff. I stand by and do not disown the stuff; this is just to say I have eaten some fuckin plums baby wahahaha!!!!
I hate the neologism "got my ass". I do not have an ass, and never will.
November 14, 2025 at 1:54 AM
I hate the neologism "got my ass". I do not have an ass, and never will.
putting my cold awful fingers on youre body... you hate it and you pick me up and throw me 40 feet.... but we're connected by the Knuckles Chaotix ring bond..... because of marriage..... And so the vicious cycle continues.
November 14, 2025 at 12:52 AM
putting my cold awful fingers on youre body... you hate it and you pick me up and throw me 40 feet.... but we're connected by the Knuckles Chaotix ring bond..... because of marriage..... And so the vicious cycle continues.