Seán-Patrick Burke
@jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
690 followers 1K following 3.3K posts
Writer. Pirate. A third thing.
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jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
And yes, if it wasn't for the vasectomy, I'd probably be like my grandparents with (10-2 due to child deaths now preventable via vaccinations) 8 kids instead of "just" 4.
a baby in a diaper is dancing in the dark
ALT: a baby in a diaper is dancing in the dark
media.tenor.com
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
I love @audacityofdespair.bsky.social

He's probably not the DEMOLITION MAN fan I am (I bet he never pinned the complementary Taco Bell movie poster to his bedroom wall), but... same.

AI ALWAYS feels... off. I've never personally physically encountered a Fleshlight, but I get the drift, and: no.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Honestly, the cyber-sex thing in DEMOLITION MAN should be studied. As an adult non-virgin, it's almost horrific how the society they're in promotes lack of contact. Pleasured eunichs. I had the Taco Bell poster on my wall as a kid, go figure.
Demolition Man Three Seashells GIF
ALT: Demolition Man Three Seashells GIF
media.tenor.com
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
AI "art" reminds me of the part in DEMOLITION MAN where SB & SS put on headsets then are brought to massive orgasms.

I was aroused as a pre-pubescent nerd, but as a real life guy in his 40's... I'd rather have the real thing, & I understand the weirdness the creators were trying to convey.
a woman in a bathrobe is smiling with her eyes closed and a hat on her head .
ALT: a woman in a bathrobe is smiling with her eyes closed and a hat on her head .
media.tenor.com
Reposted by Seán-Patrick Burke
therobmilton.com
- put down the damn AI.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Showing my age & predilections, but it always cracked me up that Kevin Mitnick was such a big fan of Hard Rock Cafe.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
As a dude: if my town had a radio show hosted by Adrienne Barbeau spinning killer records, I’d cancel Spotify.
theharvestmaid.bsky.social
The sexists do not listen to the audiophile lighthouse keeper because she is a woman. If I lived in a small town with a female audiophile lighthouse keeper, I'd heed her advice on literally anything

Should I dump him, queen?
Which cheese should I buy, queen?
Fight the fisherghosts tonight, queen?
Reposted by Seán-Patrick Burke
seantcollins.com
remember the reason for the season

🖤 NEW PLAYLIST: THE COMPLETE SEXY GOTH 1967-2025 🖤

69 songs of love and lust in the shadows

Spotify: open.spotify.com/playlist/404...

Apple Music:
music.apple.com/us/playlist/...

YouTube:
www.youtube.com/playlist?lis...
The Complete Sexy Goth 1967-2025
open.spotify.com
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
I’m way behind on this year’s movies but when 2025 shakes out I’m certain this will be one of my favorites still #Sinners

Also despite my love for the film, no way I’m gonna even try this on lol.

Also I’m 6’2” and 235lbs so it probably wouldn’t fit anyways.
A photo of a very pale Irish-American hand holding a Spirit Halloween branded Halloween costume based upon the character Stack from the motion picture SINNERS (2025). A suave black man in 1930’s attire stands in a confident pose.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
I’m so tired of the D’s having so many unforced errors.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Dude didn't even do it over Snapchat, lol. Sometimes, keep the thoughts in your head, don't hand evidence over to anyone, let alone the other side.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
The texts Virginia AG nominee Jay Jones (D) sent to Carrie Coyner (R), fantasizing about Todd Gilbert (R) being killed / his family being attacked are bizarre. It's like one of the Red Sox texting a Yankee about killing Aaron Boone & his family. Jones & Coyner just handed Virginia to MAGA. Idiots.
Reposted by Seán-Patrick Burke
gaijinrando.bsky.social
Karen Allen in John Carpenter's STARMAN (1984)

She was BOTD in 1951
Reposted by Seán-Patrick Burke
naptime.theolive.garden
love when it’s the radical left, not private equity, to blame
notice taped to a shuttered storefront

claire's
NOTICE OF STORE CLOSURE
To Our Valued Customers,
This Claire's location has been permanently closed. The decision reflects both external pressures & internal restructuring. In recent months, repeated attacks of ridicule by radical left agitators have gone beyond mere criticism, escalating into a deliberate effort to destabilize our company - conduct we recognize as Domestic Economic Terrorism.
At the same time, our transition under new private equity ownership required difficult financial choices. Protecting the stability of shareholders was prioritized, & this store - along with its local workforce - was deemed expendable in service of that obligation.
Despite these challenges, Claire's remains committed to our identity as a traditional American company rooted in values of family & community.
We will not be silenced by those who attempt to undermine that mission, & we continue to move forward with confidence in our future.
Here at Claire's, we look forward to working with the current administration to reinvigorate our brand presence across the United States, ensuring that we remain a part of American life for generations to come.
We invite you to continue supporting Claire's by shopping online at www.claires.com
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Claire's Stores, Inc.
2400 West Central Road, Hoffman Estates, IL 60192| Claire's Stores, Inc. |CBI Distributing Corp.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Also, Kenan Thompson showing yet again how he's the best, he can take a tiny part & make it the glue that keeps a forgettable sketch together (Sperm Donor).

But yeah, last night was rough. Miss you Miss Eggy! www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_LJ...
Weekend Update: Miss Eggy on the White House Correspondents' Dinner - SNL
YouTube video by Saturday Night Live
www.youtube.com
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
...it was funny the first time, now it's so predictable & the same, again & again. The holes left by Ego & Heidi leaving are massive.

Positives: Colin is a perfect Hegseth, Bowen as Dobby (love his weird characters), HUNTR/X being the better musical guest, Ashley Padilla as a horny teacher. 2/3
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Last night's SNL wasn't good. I'm a Saturday Night Live obsessive, and... the cast changes didn't do them any favors. Plus Bad Bunny was pretty off, I feel like last time he hosted he was way better. Even with Jon Hamm swinging in an assist... also I hate the gag of Trump freezing time & ranting 1/3
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Damn, SNL has almost as many “featured” players as full cast members right now. Ashley Padilla is my favorite of the featuring.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Trump economy signs: SNL commercial breaks include big production tourism ads, because… please come & spend your money.
jawsvthereturn.bsky.social
Damn, SNL has almost as many “featured” players as full cast members right now. Ashley Padilla is my favorite of the featuring.
Reposted by Seán-Patrick Burke
kikutowne.bsky.social
Gonna put this on a sandwich board and wear it on the street while ringing a bell like a town crier:

“AI is the asbestos we are shoveling into the walls of our society and our descendants will be digging it out for generations,” he continued.”