no.
@joles.bsky.social
1.1K followers 220 following 350 posts
i’m timothee chalamet
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joles.bsky.social
man was not made to look at screens all day,,, man was made to stare at the glorious sunrise in awe and wonder until he trips over a medium sized rock and fall into a bog where his body will be preserved for thousands of years
joles.bsky.social
wow this list is making the internet good and fun. thank u for the brave work u do, bad poster dot lol 🫡
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helldude.bsky.social
forum wars took over the government. the 10,000-page thread spilled out into the streets. people are getting their doors blown open and hogtied so that nerds can win an online argument. they tanked the dollar and fucked the economy permanently to own you
joles.bsky.social
no rule on the books that says you can’t do an improv routine at quaker meeting
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gregthemiller.bsky.social
confident that if they could, cats would smoke cigarettes
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woketopus.bsky.social
getting "the surgery" (98 additional legs)
joles.bsky.social
must suck to be a elephant seal. you get your heart broken by some loser, and your friends wanna know what he looked like, and then you gotta show them a picture and he looks like this
southern elephant seal. face looks like a turd, no fuckin legs, completely unserious mammal. you would be ashamed to have your heart broken by this guy
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esvrld.bsky.social
we're smoking tylenol. i injected myself with 80 gallons of horse vaccine and it turned me into a telekinetic mutant with unfathomable psychic potential. if that pussy isn't autistic, i don't want it. this shit ain't nothing to me man
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hausofdecline.bsky.social
Releasing some Patreon comics over the next few days.
Lucy pulls the football away from Charlie Brown and he is sent flying into the air. He shouts "AAUGH!" Instead of falling, Charlie Brown continues flying into the sky. He says "ha ha yes, it is finally happening..." He continues upward "I am ascending to the realm of God to take my fated place at his right hand." He goes up even further "this the reward for my endless suffering! This is my reward!!!" Lucy looks on in disbelief.
joles.bsky.social
me at 2am: i know you are tired, but you have to write this idea down. if you don’t you will lose this precious idea forever. just pick up your phone, open notes, and write it down

me at 2pm: what is a “rhino mouse”??? why do i have a note that just says “rhino mouse”?
joles.bsky.social
had to go off my adhd meds for medical reasons and since then i have become….. fully feral. a wild animal with a cushy office job. i cannot work or think. my teeth feel insane. i must return to the woods
joles.bsky.social
oh, carol i am sooo sorry that i haven’t responded to your email yet i was busy howling at the moon and also rearranging all the furniture in my living room
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funeralpig.bsky.social
those beautiful naked women have made a compelling argument i am going to steer this ship into the rocks
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funeralpig.bsky.social
getting a rib removed so i can suck my own rib
joles.bsky.social
calling into work with the ol’ “end of summer blues”
joles.bsky.social
somebody come to my house and punch me straight in the head until i fall into a peaceful slumber
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crannyboy.bsky.social
By age 33 you should be completely inept, dumb ass , can't open up, falling a lot, tripping on shoelaces, forget to tie shoes, start wearing velcro shoes, trip on other crap, fall and hit face on pavement, blood everywhere, bleeding face
joles.bsky.social
sleep is so stupid. you’re telling me i have to lie here doing nothing, completely disconnected from reality for 8 hours a day or else i will feel like shit and then die…. but also i am complete ass at it. takes me hours before i can even get started. like bro this sucks
joles.bsky.social
they too hear the ocean’s siren call
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funeralpig.bsky.social
i sent China all my data a couple years ago just for fun so this news doesn't really affect me
joles.bsky.social
it is theorized that, by the end of this calendar year,, a working iphone 5se will have developed basic theory of mind and a vast unspeakable yearning to return to the sea
joles.bsky.social
sometimes the erratic behaviors are just other more different art
joles.bsky.social
somebody has to say nice things to me about my art or else i will have to start engaging in erratic behaviors. this is known as “the human condition”
joles.bsky.social
i should know better than to get my hopes up. And Yet