Alypocalypse
@kashira-kashira.bsky.social
Nurturing my shadow self through unhinged shitposting. Engaged in a lifetime battle of roasts* with @grimmpixels (*also known as marriage). Late 30s, Pittsburgh, she/her. 18+, MDNI.
Gonna start writing all my work emails in the BUGONIA font
January 8, 2026 at 2:32 AM
Gonna start writing all my work emails in the BUGONIA font
Chris told me there will be a Steelers/Broncos game in Pittsburgh next season. I gotta show up to find some Broncos tailgaters as Oguri. I don't know anything about football, it'll be great.
January 6, 2026 at 2:54 PM
Chris told me there will be a Steelers/Broncos game in Pittsburgh next season. I gotta show up to find some Broncos tailgaters as Oguri. I don't know anything about football, it'll be great.
I am so much better at Only Connect than I am at NYT Connections.
January 6, 2026 at 2:23 PM
I am so much better at Only Connect than I am at NYT Connections.
Chris and I watched CHICAGO (2002) on NYE because he had never seen it, and ever since my constant internal monologue has been THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE
January 5, 2026 at 4:32 PM
Chris and I watched CHICAGO (2002) on NYE because he had never seen it, and ever since my constant internal monologue has been THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE GUN THE
What kind of fucking dipshit delivers for UberEats in Pittsburgh, on a bicycle, in January?
January 2, 2026 at 11:37 PM
What kind of fucking dipshit delivers for UberEats in Pittsburgh, on a bicycle, in January?
I literally forgot it was Wednesday and New Years Eve and texted my boss about a meeting she had yesterday 😣
December 31, 2025 at 3:39 PM
I literally forgot it was Wednesday and New Years Eve and texted my boss about a meeting she had yesterday 😣
Reposted by Alypocalypse
Watching THE GREEN KNIGHT again
April 22, 2024 at 7:43 PM
Watching THE GREEN KNIGHT again
Manousos from Pluribus could win The Running Man.
December 26, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Manousos from Pluribus could win The Running Man.
Confession: The first fictional character I can remember just intensely loathing was Miss Piggy in the Muppet Babies. I still can't stand her.
December 24, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Confession: The first fictional character I can remember just intensely loathing was Miss Piggy in the Muppet Babies. I still can't stand her.
I keep hearing how good Marty Supreme is, and Chris really wants to see it, but the combination of Timothee Chalamet + Gwyneth Paltrow + a Safdie brother + a movie about A Talented Man Who Is An Asshole To Everyone Around Him was engineered in a lab to repel me specifically.
December 23, 2025 at 5:19 PM
I keep hearing how good Marty Supreme is, and Chris really wants to see it, but the combination of Timothee Chalamet + Gwyneth Paltrow + a Safdie brother + a movie about A Talented Man Who Is An Asshole To Everyone Around Him was engineered in a lab to repel me specifically.
I need to get a she-wee for the next time I wear my Oguri cosplay, navigating sitting on a toilet to pee while wearing an Uma tail is Not It.
December 22, 2025 at 8:04 PM
I need to get a she-wee for the next time I wear my Oguri cosplay, navigating sitting on a toilet to pee while wearing an Uma tail is Not It.
Ariana Grande having almost exclusively hand tattoos is a bold move. She's like the Cody Rhodes of pop stars.
December 22, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Ariana Grande having almost exclusively hand tattoos is a bold move. She's like the Cody Rhodes of pop stars.
Reposted by Alypocalypse
Carrie's Mom: "They're all gonna laugh at you!"
Fozzy: "Finally!"
Fozzy: "Finally!"
December 21, 2025 at 9:36 PM
Carrie's Mom: "They're all gonna laugh at you!"
Fozzy: "Finally!"
Fozzy: "Finally!"
Fun ways in which my brain just does not work: I just said to Chris, who wrote the music for the Muppet Christmas Carol, was it Brian De Palma? And now he can't stop laughing at me. 😮💨
December 21, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Fun ways in which my brain just does not work: I just said to Chris, who wrote the music for the Muppet Christmas Carol, was it Brian De Palma? And now he can't stop laughing at me. 😮💨
Two questions:
1. What is the highest ever body count for a G-rated movie?
2. Is it a Mr. Bean movie?
1. What is the highest ever body count for a G-rated movie?
2. Is it a Mr. Bean movie?
December 21, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Two questions:
1. What is the highest ever body count for a G-rated movie?
2. Is it a Mr. Bean movie?
1. What is the highest ever body count for a G-rated movie?
2. Is it a Mr. Bean movie?
"Laura Loomer won't read your mean posts, but your friends who spend thousands of dollars to look like Dick Tracy villains with baboon anus mouths will" Do you people hear how you sound
December 19, 2025 at 3:16 PM
"Laura Loomer won't read your mean posts, but your friends who spend thousands of dollars to look like Dick Tracy villains with baboon anus mouths will" Do you people hear how you sound
Reposted by Alypocalypse
GREAT NEWS! This year’s Williams-Sonoma catalog is powered by AI! defector.com/the-2025-hat...
December 17, 2025 at 3:18 PM
GREAT NEWS! This year’s Williams-Sonoma catalog is powered by AI! defector.com/the-2025-hat...
It is one week before Christmas, why am I so fucking busy? Stop working and leave me alone. Serial killer behavior.
December 17, 2025 at 4:06 PM
It is one week before Christmas, why am I so fucking busy? Stop working and leave me alone. Serial killer behavior.
Nobody follows the cardinal internet social space rule of "lurk moar" anymore and we are much the worse for it
December 14, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Nobody follows the cardinal internet social space rule of "lurk moar" anymore and we are much the worse for it
December 14, 2025 at 2:39 PM
It's the time of year where I obsessively check @drewmagary.bsky.social 's Bluesky to see if the Hater's Guide to the Williams Sonoma Catalog has been posted yet.
December 11, 2025 at 10:48 PM
It's the time of year where I obsessively check @drewmagary.bsky.social 's Bluesky to see if the Hater's Guide to the Williams Sonoma Catalog has been posted yet.
Reposted by Alypocalypse
I am probably the first person in human history to simultaneously have Rasputina's "Herb Girls of Birkenau" and "Rattlin' Bog" as performed by The Wiggles stuck in my head.
December 11, 2025 at 4:52 PM
I am probably the first person in human history to simultaneously have Rasputina's "Herb Girls of Birkenau" and "Rattlin' Bog" as performed by The Wiggles stuck in my head.
Reposted by Alypocalypse
Glad I learned how to conserve water in elementary school so AI can suggest glue as a pizza topping
December 10, 2025 at 2:26 AM
Glad I learned how to conserve water in elementary school so AI can suggest glue as a pizza topping
If I was a vampire I would dig up the corpse of Hulk Hogan every couple hundred years to see what he looked like.
December 10, 2025 at 12:42 PM
If I was a vampire I would dig up the corpse of Hulk Hogan every couple hundred years to see what he looked like.