Matt L
@mattl1.bsky.social
I'm here now. Go Pack.
"Third Amendment Lawyer," I once joked.
Blocker of AI slop merchants. Father of two under two, therefore on the brink of insanity. Or sanity.
"Third Amendment Lawyer," I once joked.
Blocker of AI slop merchants. Father of two under two, therefore on the brink of insanity. Or sanity.
I can't stop thinking about this.
November 8, 2025 at 3:38 AM
I can't stop thinking about this.
I have a few. It's been a life.
Rubinoff Vodka.
Captain Morgan.
Original Four Loko.
KD.
Fireman's 4. (Not their fault.)
Ouzo.
Goldschlager.
Rubinoff Vodka.
Captain Morgan.
Original Four Loko.
KD.
Fireman's 4. (Not their fault.)
Ouzo.
Goldschlager.
I have a few.... that have made me call Earl 🥴
November 5, 2025 at 1:16 AM
I have a few. It's been a life.
Rubinoff Vodka.
Captain Morgan.
Original Four Loko.
KD.
Fireman's 4. (Not their fault.)
Ouzo.
Goldschlager.
Rubinoff Vodka.
Captain Morgan.
Original Four Loko.
KD.
Fireman's 4. (Not their fault.)
Ouzo.
Goldschlager.
Drunkards and lechers. And probably a few Protestants
October 26, 2025 at 11:52 PM
Drunkards and lechers. And probably a few Protestants
"Dada wine all gone." - undoubtedly my child, 1
October 17, 2025 at 12:13 AM
"Dada wine all gone." - undoubtedly my child, 1
My favorite TX/OU Weekend pastime: counting the cars going the wrong way on Haskell.
October 11, 2025 at 1:08 AM
My favorite TX/OU Weekend pastime: counting the cars going the wrong way on Haskell.
Thinking about this line a lot lately.
October 1, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Thinking about this line a lot lately.
There aren't THAT many days that being a Packers fan in Dallas is particularly joyous (though more than being a Cowboys fan anywhere), but this is one of them.
August 28, 2025 at 9:34 PM
There aren't THAT many days that being a Packers fan in Dallas is particularly joyous (though more than being a Cowboys fan anywhere), but this is one of them.
Reposted by Matt L
I am an American aquarium drinker; I assassin down the avenue.
August 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
I am an American aquarium drinker; I assassin down the avenue.
Reposted by Matt L
I hate when someone unearths my pube-autograph to the world's most famous pedophile while I'm dying of cankles
July 18, 2025 at 12:14 AM
I hate when someone unearths my pube-autograph to the world's most famous pedophile while I'm dying of cankles
I do not understand why educators are not fighting this shit tooth and nail. My kids will be starting school in a few years, and I fear this junk will be forced on them from day one.
This just in:
Microsoft announces $4 billion for A.I. education, as tech giants race to embed their chatbots into teaching and learning.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/09/b...
Microsoft announces $4 billion for A.I. education, as tech giants race to embed their chatbots into teaching and learning.
www.nytimes.com/2025/07/09/b...
Microsoft Pledges $4 Billion Toward A.I. Education
www.nytimes.com
July 9, 2025 at 6:02 PM
I do not understand why educators are not fighting this shit tooth and nail. My kids will be starting school in a few years, and I fear this junk will be forced on them from day one.
Two kids and one dog is harder than one kid and two dogs. Especially if all humans have a cold. And the youngest one has diarrhea.
And the dog gets bitey when a baby cries...
And the dog gets bitey when a baby cries...
July 3, 2025 at 1:01 AM
Two kids and one dog is harder than one kid and two dogs. Especially if all humans have a cold. And the youngest one has diarrhea.
And the dog gets bitey when a baby cries...
And the dog gets bitey when a baby cries...
Everything before the word "but" is bullshit.
Brooke Rollins: "Every day, USDA spends nearly $300 million on SNAP. $300 million! That's a huge government program. We're never gonna take food out of hungry kids' mouths, but ... "
July 2, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Everything before the word "but" is bullshit.
I've listened to "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" approximately 1,054 times in the last 24 hours. No idea why. Like, why the fuck.
Just want my 0 followers to know what's up.
Just want my 0 followers to know what's up.
July 2, 2025 at 12:46 AM
I've listened to "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" approximately 1,054 times in the last 24 hours. No idea why. Like, why the fuck.
Just want my 0 followers to know what's up.
Just want my 0 followers to know what's up.
Is the celebrity minor, or the interaction? Either way, I chatted briefly with Dustin Diamond at the Elbow Room.
Right folks. Feeling rather down at the moment so bringing back an oldie
Please Quote this with your most minor celebrity interaction
Please Quote this with your most minor celebrity interaction
June 13, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Is the celebrity minor, or the interaction? Either way, I chatted briefly with Dustin Diamond at the Elbow Room.
Anyone got eyes on Dylan and McCartney?
June 11, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Anyone got eyes on Dylan and McCartney?
I think it's time to admit that my experience with Third Amendment law is EXTREMELY limited.
June 9, 2025 at 9:30 PM
I think it's time to admit that my experience with Third Amendment law is EXTREMELY limited.
Has to be Etta James.
Everyone else I can think of kinda pales in comparison.
Everyone else I can think of kinda pales in comparison.
Who was the best opening act you've seen live?
June 5, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Has to be Etta James.
Everyone else I can think of kinda pales in comparison.
Everyone else I can think of kinda pales in comparison.
Reposted by Matt L
this is like drake and kendrick lamar but they're both drake
June 5, 2025 at 8:22 PM
this is like drake and kendrick lamar but they're both drake
I've had a busy day. Any news?
June 5, 2025 at 7:27 PM
I've had a busy day. Any news?
This is just me at a Dallas bar every time I say, "Dez didn't catch it."
What take would you choose to argue on jubilee with total confidence that you’d crush 20 opponents?
May 29, 2025 at 5:45 PM
This is just me at a Dallas bar every time I say, "Dez didn't catch it."
Fucking fuck. Fuck fucking every-fucking-thing.
May 25, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Fucking fuck. Fuck fucking every-fucking-thing.
It's the opposite of leadership. Follow-ship.
if your grand approach to politics is bloodless poll-testing so that you're always aligned with wherever public opinion happens to be, you've already lost
May 25, 2025 at 3:10 PM
It's the opposite of leadership. Follow-ship.
Willow. Swear to god.
May 23, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Willow. Swear to god.
This is what they do. They know the right answer. They just don't care. These hearings are just another excuse to lie while blaming Biden. The only adverse consequences come from telling the truth.
HASSAN: What is habeas corpus?
NOEM: Habeas corpus is a constitutional right that the president has to be able to remove people from this country
HASSAN: That's incorrect
NOEM: Habeas corpus is a constitutional right that the president has to be able to remove people from this country
HASSAN: That's incorrect
May 20, 2025 at 5:30 PM
This is what they do. They know the right answer. They just don't care. These hearings are just another excuse to lie while blaming Biden. The only adverse consequences come from telling the truth.
As someone over 40, my advice to the youngsters out there is to find a great pillow.
I never anticipated how many days (and subsequent nights) would be ruined by a sore neck.
I never anticipated how many days (and subsequent nights) would be ruined by a sore neck.
never beating the everyone-is-38-on-here allegations
May 19, 2025 at 2:54 AM
As someone over 40, my advice to the youngsters out there is to find a great pillow.
I never anticipated how many days (and subsequent nights) would be ruined by a sore neck.
I never anticipated how many days (and subsequent nights) would be ruined by a sore neck.