*mechanic wipes his hands on a rag*
Well, there’s your trouble
*points to a lifetime of crippling depression and anxiety*

Flipping heck! That was a bit good! @warringtonruncorn.com & The Mistys @thetradesclub.bsky.social
Thank you for the trip down memory lane!

@warringtonruncorn.com if you get to Hebden Bridge come and say ”Hi!”

I was helping my father clear out cupboards and found a large pot of white powder.We both assumed it was garden stuff and ignored it. Then we both realised that it was my mother, who'd died 25 years earlier. Then we found, in the freezer,the blackberries she'd been picking when she dropped dead.

A bit too subtle there from Poland #eurovision

First act of first semi final and we already have our winner. They might as well just send everyone wlelse home. #eurovision

As the song on the radio played, Arnold couldn’t help but wonder if this poor Taylor Swift girl would ever find true happiness. He made a mental note to send her one of his tennis balls when he got home.

Don’t know why but the last para of Animal Farm is running thru my head

“The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.”

Just trying to enjoy my Weetabix but I’ve found a great big lump of AI potential has been unleashed in it to transform my life. I just wanted my Weetabix. Thanks for nothing, Keir.

The Passel Estate Lot 71 Reserve Syrah 2018 bottle is empty and it seems the sommelier has left with the wine cellar keys. I’ve had to resort to making myself a mug of Yorkshire Tea like some kind of peasant.

How come I only know the shortcuts for copy & paste and internet history, yet the cat can walk across the keyboard and open a bank account?

One of the absolute best things about a Sunday roast is using the left over veg to make patties for Monday dinner. #britishcuisine

Needs to be a “shunned and unloved” tab we can all meet on to bitch about the big accounts

Me realising I’ll never appear in the “popular with friends” tab cos 😞