tank_effing_johnson
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tankeffingjohnson.bsky.social
tank_effing_johnson
@tankeffingjohnson.bsky.social
Hi, I am a fat, Midwestern woman in my 30's who likes weird cross stitch and my dogs. This is the same me that is the me on IG. I pinky swear.

https://ko-fi.com/tankeffingjohnson <--- patterns
Pinned
I'll like every post I see about people picking up cross stitch, starting a new project, trying a new skill because goddamn is it hard and I see you and your effort.
Where is the best place to buy a DMC 310 cone (a.k.a. the cone of doom)? I want to finally get one, but I'm not sure where? I usually buy from 123stitch. Thought I'd outsource though and see if I get some better places. #crossstitch #embroidery #blackwork #stumpwork #sashiko #threadpainting
November 13, 2025 at 7:37 PM
Goon a movie:

Eternal Goon of the Spotless Mind
November 11, 2025 at 1:59 AM
I'm going to be working on something for a show that is a pattern I wouldn't know how to share really? But I'll keep sharing and repost patterns that follow my values. I just won't have any patterns I made for a while.
November 10, 2025 at 8:11 PM
Sometimes.... ko-fi.com/s/69525d7bb2 #padmundpondhop #brennanleemulligan #criticalrole #wildemountwildings #bullywug I haven't watched critical role! Please forgive me fans of the show. It's not my fault Brennan is an eloquent speaker.
A Better World - Tank Johnson's Ko-fi Shop
-Digital (.pdf) copy of a cross stitch pattern with backstitched text that says "sometimes explosive, decisive violence without leaving any opening fo...
ko-fi.com
November 5, 2025 at 11:39 PM
I just realized none of the patterns on my ko-fi have social media information or even the link back to my ko-fi on them. I mean, I'm not going to go back and "fix" them. But jeez what an oversight.
November 5, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
Gender affirming care saves lives cross stitch pattern 🐰🏳️‍⚧️✨

Link to cross stitch pattern: samanthalanetextiles.etsy.com/listing/4396...

Link to my gender affirming surgery GoFundMe: gofund.me/b5ef54067

#crossstitch #stitchsky #needlework #fiberarts #craftsky #trans #gofundme
November 5, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
Call me a catholic tailor the way I'm Cross Stitching
November 5, 2025 at 9:20 PM
Lol, sometimes I wonder if people think I'm a bot because of all the cross stitch related posts I love and my account is just cross stitch and my life is just cross stitch. Nope. I'm a real human.
November 5, 2025 at 4:59 PM
Time to get my pattern finalized so I can upload it to ko-fi today. Upload day is usually a good day.
November 5, 2025 at 4:57 PM
I have 14 days to decide if I want to enter an art show. I am mostly a cross stitch gremlin that holes up in my craft room. So, I know this is something I want to do, but rejection would be hard and participation would be harder.
November 2, 2025 at 9:58 PM
Currently waiting for my washed piece to dry so I can iron it. But not patiently waiting.
November 2, 2025 at 2:27 AM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
I'm giving a talk in a couple weeks on how AI is basically ruining the cottage pattern industry for knitting + crochet + cross stitch etc. If you have any particularly egregious examples of AI generated patterns or example pictures, drop them!
November 1, 2025 at 1:07 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
It’s done! #crossstitch

Pattern: ko-fi.com/s/f5ffc218da
October 30, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
CURRENT CROSS STITCH KITS IN STOCK IN MY ETSY SHOP. These kits are in stock and ready to ship. I'm working on restocking others.
See link in bio for link to my Etsy shop to get your kit before it sells out!
October 29, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
My latest #crossstitch is done!
October 28, 2025 at 12:57 AM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
I have the day off and should be cleaning my room. Instead, I stumbled across a cross-stitch pattern I really need to make. 🤷🏼‍♀️🪡🧵
#crossstitch #nokings

www.threads.com/@tuskandcard...
Lindsay Swearingen (@tuskandcardinal) on Threads
Sometimes when you want to stab something 1000 times, you just have to settle for fabric. I’m offering this cross stitch pattern for free; tap the l1nk in my b10 to find a free google doc. It’s barebo...
www.threads.com
October 28, 2025 at 12:52 PM
I think it goes hard.

Missing the first "but" is an accident. Changing to "trans" was on purpose. Pattern (even a version where I added the "but") available on my Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/s/9168119134

#crossstitch #embroidery #fiberart #furry
October 23, 2025 at 11:40 PM
Well, I finished my meme stitch. I just have to fix the pattern and upload it to kofi. Just have to... fix the pattern... just have to... uuuuuggghhhhhh
October 23, 2025 at 8:42 PM
If you find yourself cringing saying AI "art", but don't know what else to say may I suggest AI slop. It also applies to everything else produced by AI. Slop.
October 22, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
You're not an embarrassed millionaire. You're just embarrassing. ko-fi.com/s/fd938c3f8f, it's pwyw, which can mean free #crossstitch #fiberart #subversivecrossstitch #moderncrossstitch #crafting
March 18, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Reposted by tank_effing_johnson
Have another Free Cross Stitch Pattern that I made for the #NoKings #Protests (though this one is much smaller)

This one honestly feels like it's missing something... but I can't put my finger on it. Choosing to believe my brain is just being a perfectionist and making problems where there are none
October 18, 2025 at 2:23 AM
Saw the post I quoted was deleted, but I love that pattern so much here is a link to it: shitpostsampler.sellfy.store/p/weird-hill/
October 2, 2025 at 11:24 PM
The thing about art featuring memes, popular culture, and current events done in a medium that takes ages to make is that there's no guarantee it'll still be funny/relevant when you finish. #thisisabout #crossstitch
September 28, 2025 at 2:44 AM