Yared, your favorite
@yourfavoriteyared.bsky.social
Rascal, rake, roustabout. Today is my birthday.
They/them
They/them
Pinned
All my stuff is on chopyourcockoffwithabigsword.com
Poisoning his royal highness must go hard af if you're the scheming grand vizier.
December 28, 2025 at 5:33 AM
Poisoning his royal highness must go hard af if you're the scheming grand vizier.
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
Tell her you had a nice time by belching after eating her pussy
December 24, 2025 at 3:04 PM
Tell her you had a nice time by belching after eating her pussy
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
in the director's cut of Home Alone, uncle Frank says, "look what you did, you little cunt." That's the only difference
December 19, 2025 at 6:54 PM
in the director's cut of Home Alone, uncle Frank says, "look what you did, you little cunt." That's the only difference
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
For about ten years I've thought about what a Tom Waits TV Christmas special produced in the early 80s would have been like. It's almost real to me. The set is a Depression-era shack he built and a stream of celebrity hobos keep knocking on the door and Tom goes "I wOnDEr WHo tHaT cOuLd bE"
December 13, 2024 at 4:49 PM
For about ten years I've thought about what a Tom Waits TV Christmas special produced in the early 80s would have been like. It's almost real to me. The set is a Depression-era shack he built and a stream of celebrity hobos keep knocking on the door and Tom goes "I wOnDEr WHo tHaT cOuLd bE"
Tell her you had a nice time by belching after eating her pussy
December 24, 2025 at 3:04 PM
Tell her you had a nice time by belching after eating her pussy
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
So do you wipe your balls front to back or back to front?
December 18, 2025 at 4:33 PM
So do you wipe your balls front to back or back to front?
They call me bram by the way i am stokering
December 18, 2025 at 5:53 AM
They call me bram by the way i am stokering
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
I bet dawdling in such dress as you used to wear goes hard af if youre a wench
December 16, 2025 at 12:19 AM
I bet dawdling in such dress as you used to wear goes hard af if youre a wench
My new years resolution is to grow a pair of tits
December 15, 2025 at 5:44 PM
My new years resolution is to grow a pair of tits
Man goes to doctor and says he has been kicked in the head by a horse. Doctor says, "easy fix, there is a performance of The King in Yellow playing in town, it will cheer you right up." Man hangs his head and says, "but Doctor! I am the King in Yellow!"
December 11, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Man goes to doctor and says he has been kicked in the head by a horse. Doctor says, "easy fix, there is a performance of The King in Yellow playing in town, it will cheer you right up." Man hangs his head and says, "but Doctor! I am the King in Yellow!"
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
They haven't invented the gender-affirming surgery that would fix me (the one where they give you hundreds of holes for your tadpoles to live in)
January 21, 2025 at 5:12 AM
They haven't invented the gender-affirming surgery that would fix me (the one where they give you hundreds of holes for your tadpoles to live in)
"Hanged" is for people
"Hung" is for dongs
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
"Hung" is for dongs
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
December 8, 2025 at 8:45 PM
"Hanged" is for people
"Hung" is for dongs
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
"Hung" is for dongs
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
i do not watch porn in private on incognito mode. I wait by the stop sign in front of my house for the truck with brakes that sound like it's having an orgasm and i jack off in full view of the driver. Seek a greater thrill than what your phone can provide.
December 8, 2025 at 8:09 PM
i do not watch porn in private on incognito mode. I wait by the stop sign in front of my house for the truck with brakes that sound like it's having an orgasm and i jack off in full view of the driver. Seek a greater thrill than what your phone can provide.
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
ME: wow this painting rocks
MY PEDANTIC CAVEMAN BUDDY: uhh huhu me think you mean this *painted* rocks
MY PEDANTIC CAVEMAN BUDDY: uhh huhu me think you mean this *painted* rocks
December 6, 2025 at 7:29 AM
ME: wow this painting rocks
MY PEDANTIC CAVEMAN BUDDY: uhh huhu me think you mean this *painted* rocks
MY PEDANTIC CAVEMAN BUDDY: uhh huhu me think you mean this *painted* rocks
We are the daughters of the pornbots you couldn't ban
December 6, 2025 at 5:09 AM
We are the daughters of the pornbots you couldn't ban
No, but i do have the mandela effect where i remember the berenstain bears smoked weed in one book
December 5, 2025 at 2:14 AM
No, but i do have the mandela effect where i remember the berenstain bears smoked weed in one book
The Shroud of Turin is one of the more obvious fakes among holy relics, notably because it doesn't show the dong of the Christ.
November 26, 2025 at 6:47 PM
The Shroud of Turin is one of the more obvious fakes among holy relics, notably because it doesn't show the dong of the Christ.
Borscht for breakfast, borscht for lunch,
Borsht for dinner, and borsht for brunch.
Serve it cream or maybe some bread,
Just don't be scared when your shit is red.
Borsht for dinner, and borsht for brunch.
Serve it cream or maybe some bread,
Just don't be scared when your shit is red.
November 23, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Borscht for breakfast, borscht for lunch,
Borsht for dinner, and borsht for brunch.
Serve it cream or maybe some bread,
Just don't be scared when your shit is red.
Borsht for dinner, and borsht for brunch.
Serve it cream or maybe some bread,
Just don't be scared when your shit is red.
I can credit THE DISPOSSESSED by Le Guin, THE MASTER AND MARGARITA by Bulgakov, and PARABLE OF THE SOWER by Butler for ensuring i count on making it to tomorrow. It will get worse before it gets better. But it will get better. I am the cockroach that survives the bomb because of these books.
performative reading, lack of reading skills, nobody's reading anymore -- NO!
tell me about a book that changed you
for me? the *extremely* ahistorical novel, THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY which I read at 13 and was like, "Oh, art can be *everything* to a maker, for good and bad"
tell me about a book that changed you
for me? the *extremely* ahistorical novel, THE AGONY AND THE ECSTASY which I read at 13 and was like, "Oh, art can be *everything* to a maker, for good and bad"
November 12, 2025 at 5:48 AM
I can credit THE DISPOSSESSED by Le Guin, THE MASTER AND MARGARITA by Bulgakov, and PARABLE OF THE SOWER by Butler for ensuring i count on making it to tomorrow. It will get worse before it gets better. But it will get better. I am the cockroach that survives the bomb because of these books.
My other car is a whaling vessel scouring the southern hemisphere for the elusive, pale leviathan known by the terrible appellation Moby-Dick.
November 6, 2025 at 4:29 PM
My other car is a whaling vessel scouring the southern hemisphere for the elusive, pale leviathan known by the terrible appellation Moby-Dick.
Hell yeah it fuckin happened babyyyy!!!!
I can't wait to see the Sideshow Bob Rake Gag played out in electoral politics
Cuomo says he's considering running against Mamdani as an independent
November 5, 2025 at 4:38 PM
Hell yeah it fuckin happened babyyyy!!!!
Zohran, please, Los Angeles needs you.
November 4, 2025 at 11:41 PM
Zohran, please, Los Angeles needs you.
Not to speculate, but
November 2, 2025 at 3:56 AM
Not to speculate, but
Reposted by Yared, your favorite
brain: "english major is into They Might Be Giants" is one of those "Fork Found In Kitchen" kinda sentences, ain't it
me: mmm.
me: mmm.
October 27, 2025 at 3:25 PM
brain: "english major is into They Might Be Giants" is one of those "Fork Found In Kitchen" kinda sentences, ain't it
me: mmm.
me: mmm.