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95Sports

@95sports.bsky.social

1.8K followers 510 following 21K posts

Commentary on sports (and other stuff) up and down highway 95. Same dick jokes, new location. The work still goes on.

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · Nov 6

For the new followers. Hi, I’m Matt. I like Philadelphia and New York sports teams. (Eagles, NYR, NYY, Union)

Not 100% dick.

I don’t buy into rivalries without stakes.

I enjoy wit provolone and a nice pair of slacks.

Everything comes back to two things: pro wrestling or New Jersey.

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 7h

I mean, that is a proven preventative measure for prostate cancer though...

UndertakerMongoose @unstablemongoose.bsky.social · 7h

The “press both buttons meme, hitting both “cure cancer” and “erotica”, with the word “with” interposed between the two buttons.

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 7h

Freddie Freeman answers the question "What if Jm J Bullock, but jock?"

Razzball @razzball.bsky.social · 7h

Having Freddie Freeman wave his ass in your face when you’re down 5-1 and about to move to two games down? Gotta hurt

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 7h

the movie is actually SEND HELP, not GET HELP

but it's basically "What if Castaway, but with an asshole boss?"

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 7h

(watches the trailer for GET HELP)

Me: This will turn into a romantic comedy.

Trailer: From Sam Raimi

Me: Oh.

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 7h

hit the Avenue Q music folks

Razzball @razzball.bsky.social · 8h

Cure cancer or erotica, the age old AI question

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 8h

Look, given the cosplayers I follow, there are MULTIPLE women who can qualify with that description.

I'm a man who appreciates the beauty this world has to offer.

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 8h

why are you in my IG history

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 8h

Someone actually called WIP early on in the season and thought she was Taryn

She was audibly pissed the rest of the segment

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 8h

Little detail I noticed watching TOP GUN MAVERICK.

During the beach football scene, Rooster is throwing a carefully obscured Eagles football.

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 14h

Reminder to secure all firearms in your house.

Sitcom People @sitcompeople.bsky.social · 14h

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 15h

Go to an emergency room if your Tulane football game lasts more than four hours.

Sickos Committee @sickoscommittee.org · 15h

Is your heart healthy enough for Tulane Football? Try Zycarl.

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

I mean they warned us that one of the flavors was GUN

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

a man wearing a red shirt that says crossfit brigade

ALT: a man wearing a red shirt that says crossfit brigade

media.tenor.com

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

POWERTHIRST

paris martineau @paris.nyc · 17h

my latest investigation for @consumerreports.org is based on months of reporting and 60+ lab tests of leading protein supplements

we found that most protein powders and shakes have more lead in one serving than our experts say is safe to have in a day (🧵)

www.consumerreports.org/lead/protein...

Protein Powders and Shakes Contain High Levels of Lead - Consumer Reports

CR tests of 23 popular protein powders and shakes found that most contain high levels of lead.

www.consumerreports.org

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

This, exactly. Beer test 101.

I want to have a beer with Pritzker. I want to have a beer with Biden.

Newsom does not pass that test.

John Cluverius @johncluverius.bsky.social · 16h

like it or not it's how you carry it. Pritzker looks, moves, and talks like he's part of Local 400, not the Forbes 400.

95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

THIS GUY should be walking the Undertaker down to the ring at Wrestlemania.

Shana @shanamd.bsky.social · 16h

THIS GUY has shit to say about Dan Crenshaw? Lost his eye while serving as a SEAL in Afghanistan, and this guy is talking shit?

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 16h

Remember what happened when taxes on a breakfast beverage hit a lil too high? Something about a boat in Massachusetts, I dunno.

The Atlantic @theatlantic.com · 18h

Tariffs have rapidly increased the price of coffee—a drink with almost no nutritional value and lots of functional substitutes. Yet coffee may also be the one thing Americans can’t live without, @elcush.bsky.social writes:

The Drink That Americans Won’t Give Up Without a Fight

Coffee has almost no nutritional value and lots of substitutes. It’s also, apparently, too important to lose.

bit.ly

Reposted by 95Sports

Richard M. Nixon @dicknixon.bsky.social · 16h

Pritzker has touched on it but in so many words his line will be, "Yeah, I'm rich. But my money's safe. I don't run a business. I have more than I need. I'm not beholden to anybody. This puts me in a position to fight for you. I want more money in your pocket and for it to be as safe as mine."

Mark Shatraw @markshatraw.bsky.social · 16h

Works for some, not others. Pritzker's a billionaire; what does he mean "we"

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 17h

Reposted by 95Sports

Matt McMuscles @mattmcmuscles.bsky.social · 17h

RIP to Drew Struzen, the greatest to ever do it. 🙌

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95Sports @95sports.bsky.social · 17h

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