Brandon Bird
@brandonbird.bsky.social
Artist, Jerry Orbach Car owner, Sears shopper. store.brandonbird.com
They charge at another actor and punch and kick them, duh.
February 13, 2026 at 5:01 AM
They charge at another actor and punch and kick them, duh.
You know, if you don't think stormtroopers are like Border Patrol (and vice versa), what exactly do you think is happening in this scene?
February 13, 2026 at 4:11 AM
You know, if you don't think stormtroopers are like Border Patrol (and vice versa), what exactly do you think is happening in this scene?
It's always about the Ewok.
February 13, 2026 at 3:58 AM
It's always about the Ewok.
And to me the most important aspect is not the replacement of the stormtrooper helmets, it's what the Ewok represents.
February 13, 2026 at 3:57 AM
And to me the most important aspect is not the replacement of the stormtrooper helmets, it's what the Ewok represents.
The best ideas I have sort of bubble up fully formed. That's what the Ewok drawing was. "Yes, I see it, I should draw that."
February 13, 2026 at 3:57 AM
The best ideas I have sort of bubble up fully formed. That's what the Ewok drawing was. "Yes, I see it, I should draw that."
(Sorry to use up a mention slot)
February 13, 2026 at 3:50 AM
(Sorry to use up a mention slot)
My experience is that the desktop is fine but phone mentions are messed up.
February 13, 2026 at 3:50 AM
My experience is that the desktop is fine but phone mentions are messed up.
At the very least, I know that I am following my own sensibilities, and not just "hur hur randomness!"
February 13, 2026 at 3:22 AM
At the very least, I know that I am following my own sensibilities, and not just "hur hur randomness!"
At the risk of being the kind of person who says, "My work is a critique of white masculinity," that is kinda sorta what the through-line is.
February 13, 2026 at 3:11 AM
At the risk of being the kind of person who says, "My work is a critique of white masculinity," that is kinda sorta what the through-line is.
I mean the whole point of veering out of one's lane just a little is so that someone is like, "Wait a minute, this makes me uncomfortable" and they maybe start to think and reconsider.
February 13, 2026 at 3:06 AM
I mean the whole point of veering out of one's lane just a little is so that someone is like, "Wait a minute, this makes me uncomfortable" and they maybe start to think and reconsider.
At a panel someone asked why I didn't paint that many women and my answer was, "Well, men deserve to be made fun of."
February 13, 2026 at 3:05 AM
At a panel someone asked why I didn't paint that many women and my answer was, "Well, men deserve to be made fun of."
My favorite topics to paint are a crumbling department store chain and a TV show called "Law & Order."
February 13, 2026 at 3:01 AM
My favorite topics to paint are a crumbling department store chain and a TV show called "Law & Order."
What it's usually not is ~topical~ like, say, a political cartoon.
February 13, 2026 at 2:55 AM
What it's usually not is ~topical~ like, say, a political cartoon.
Someone on my mailing list took umbrage at my Ewok drawing because they're friends with people who work for Border Patrol, and can assure me that they are not fascists. Then they closed with "I like your non-political art though" which has now radicalized me into believing all my art is political.
February 13, 2026 at 2:54 AM
Someone on my mailing list took umbrage at my Ewok drawing because they're friends with people who work for Border Patrol, and can assure me that they are not fascists. Then they closed with "I like your non-political art though" which has now radicalized me into believing all my art is political.
What.
February 13, 2026 at 12:00 AM
What.
Reposted by Brandon Bird
“Oh, my God! Dung beetles! … And in their filthy dungarees, of course!”
February 12, 2026 at 11:11 PM
“Oh, my God! Dung beetles! … And in their filthy dungarees, of course!”
Has he noticed he has somewhere between 2 and 10 visible, chronic diseases.
February 12, 2026 at 9:25 PM
Has he noticed he has somewhere between 2 and 10 visible, chronic diseases.
These guys are scared of needles and scared of looking and feeling weak, that's really all there is to the MAHA movement.
February 12, 2026 at 9:18 PM
These guys are scared of needles and scared of looking and feeling weak, that's really all there is to the MAHA movement.
Normal people, the kind who think seeing doctors getting shots is no biggie, are not "scared" by germs. It's not an emotional decision at all, it's having enough rational thought to be like, "Yes, it would be better and more enjoyable to not be sick."
February 12, 2026 at 9:15 PM
Normal people, the kind who think seeing doctors getting shots is no biggie, are not "scared" by germs. It's not an emotional decision at all, it's having enough rational thought to be like, "Yes, it would be better and more enjoyable to not be sick."
What was I saying about Americans being fucking weird about doctors and health
RFK Jr: I'm not scared of a germ. I used to snort cocaine off of toilet seats.
February 12, 2026 at 9:12 PM
What was I saying about Americans being fucking weird about doctors and health
(And "not going to the doctor" and "avoiding doctors" are two different things.)
February 12, 2026 at 9:09 PM
(And "not going to the doctor" and "avoiding doctors" are two different things.)
The things I'm talking about--annual physicals and colon cancer screenings at age 45--are free. And the cancer victim we're talking about, a well-off famous person, thought he was healthy because he took "cold water plunges." Avoiding doctors is a cultural attitude that transcends cost or access.
February 12, 2026 at 9:08 PM
The things I'm talking about--annual physicals and colon cancer screenings at age 45--are free. And the cancer victim we're talking about, a well-off famous person, thought he was healthy because he took "cold water plunges." Avoiding doctors is a cultural attitude that transcends cost or access.
p.s. if you are intimidated by colonoscopies you can ask about doing the non-invasive test where you collect your poo and send it in, my doctor mentioned that they are getting close to being as accurate (but in a colonoscopy they can laser off polyps then and there).
February 12, 2026 at 8:46 PM
p.s. if you are intimidated by colonoscopies you can ask about doing the non-invasive test where you collect your poo and send it in, my doctor mentioned that they are getting close to being as accurate (but in a colonoscopy they can laser off polyps then and there).
My doctor tells me I'm fat, but she also tells me, "You are 45, it is time for you to have a colonoscopy."
February 12, 2026 at 8:34 PM
My doctor tells me I'm fat, but she also tells me, "You are 45, it is time for you to have a colonoscopy."
It is an actual problem that not enough people are getting colonoscopies when they DO have access to them, and it is an even larger problem that Americans don't like going to the doctor and will do a lot of wacky shit to avoid going to the doctor.
February 12, 2026 at 8:29 PM
It is an actual problem that not enough people are getting colonoscopies when they DO have access to them, and it is an even larger problem that Americans don't like going to the doctor and will do a lot of wacky shit to avoid going to the doctor.