Reposted by dane
you’re telling me a season affected this disorder?
January 24, 2025 at 9:30 PM
you’re telling me a season affected this disorder?
accidentally ran a red light this morning at 30 years old which gives me a little empathy for the 85 year olds who have the tendency plow their vehicles into playgrounds
January 24, 2025 at 11:34 AM
accidentally ran a red light this morning at 30 years old which gives me a little empathy for the 85 year olds who have the tendency plow their vehicles into playgrounds
shelves inside of refrigerators should be renamed to “fridge bridge”
January 24, 2025 at 10:51 AM
shelves inside of refrigerators should be renamed to “fridge bridge”
Reposted by dane
what if walls were called vertical ceilings
January 23, 2025 at 12:20 AM
what if walls were called vertical ceilings
Reposted by dane
Fuck that was a lot of cough syrup for just imagining that I might cough.
January 23, 2025 at 4:05 AM
Fuck that was a lot of cough syrup for just imagining that I might cough.
Reposted by dane
If I was a professional tennis player my strategy would be to hit a perfect unreturnable serve every time
January 24, 2025 at 10:06 AM
If I was a professional tennis player my strategy would be to hit a perfect unreturnable serve every time
Reposted by dane
the perfect first date? january 1st
January 1, 2025 at 6:35 AM
the perfect first date? january 1st
Reposted by dane
ratatouille: anyone can cook
inside out: everyone has feelings
monsters university: the monsters that live in ur closet need a fucking degree to do that shit
inside out: everyone has feelings
monsters university: the monsters that live in ur closet need a fucking degree to do that shit
January 1, 2025 at 6:56 PM
ratatouille: anyone can cook
inside out: everyone has feelings
monsters university: the monsters that live in ur closet need a fucking degree to do that shit
inside out: everyone has feelings
monsters university: the monsters that live in ur closet need a fucking degree to do that shit
dear mister president when are you going to lower the price of zyns and fent and video game microtransactions
January 24, 2025 at 2:13 AM
dear mister president when are you going to lower the price of zyns and fent and video game microtransactions
Reposted by dane
“waahhhh egg prices are too high” just lay the eggs yourself you lazy prick
January 24, 2025 at 2:11 AM
“waahhhh egg prices are too high” just lay the eggs yourself you lazy prick
i’m a month into learning how to play the bass guitar and i already grew a chin beard, gained 100 lbs, and have cargo jorts grafted onto my body
January 24, 2025 at 2:11 AM
i’m a month into learning how to play the bass guitar and i already grew a chin beard, gained 100 lbs, and have cargo jorts grafted onto my body
computer pull up 100 images of Gary Busey eating the crunchy hard stuff at the bottom of a corn dog
January 24, 2025 at 2:04 AM
computer pull up 100 images of Gary Busey eating the crunchy hard stuff at the bottom of a corn dog
if you do a bong rip over call of duty voice chat you’ll get 1 hour of double xp
January 24, 2025 at 2:02 AM
if you do a bong rip over call of duty voice chat you’ll get 1 hour of double xp
Hoobastank is not only a name for a band but also a name for my cat’s unwashed asshole
January 24, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Hoobastank is not only a name for a band but also a name for my cat’s unwashed asshole
Reposted by dane
BREAKING NEWS: President Trump has just pardoned the band Incubus
January 24, 2025 at 1:58 AM
BREAKING NEWS: President Trump has just pardoned the band Incubus
social anxiety makes me do crazy things like buying zyns and booze via postmates
January 24, 2025 at 1:59 AM
social anxiety makes me do crazy things like buying zyns and booze via postmates
googling if the rizzler has dwarfism and the results are inconclusive
January 24, 2025 at 1:55 AM
googling if the rizzler has dwarfism and the results are inconclusive
really hopin’ some mother fucker runs up to donald trump and pantses him in front of all of his friends
January 24, 2025 at 1:53 AM
really hopin’ some mother fucker runs up to donald trump and pantses him in front of all of his friends
Reposted by dane
Kid Rock is short for Kidney Rocking Chair
January 23, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Kid Rock is short for Kidney Rocking Chair
gonna start ozempic so that the lost fat can increase the size of my turd logs
January 24, 2025 at 1:47 AM
gonna start ozempic so that the lost fat can increase the size of my turd logs
first thing i’m gonna do when meet an alien is show him my PlayStation 5 platinum trophy collection
January 23, 2025 at 7:41 PM
first thing i’m gonna do when meet an alien is show him my PlayStation 5 platinum trophy collection
Reposted by dane
Me when my coworkers ask me how I’m doing today:
At least 3, maybe 4 seconds away from some kinda religious psychosis probably
January 23, 2025 at 1:56 PM
Me when my coworkers ask me how I’m doing today:
Reposted by dane
60 year old Florida man with a colon obstruction the size of a Gambian Pouched Rat:
“I’m twitter’s dankest memelord”
“I’m twitter’s dankest memelord”
January 23, 2025 at 7:19 PM
60 year old Florida man with a colon obstruction the size of a Gambian Pouched Rat:
“I’m twitter’s dankest memelord”
“I’m twitter’s dankest memelord”
everyone is always concerned where the aliens are but nobody is asking what their feces looks and/or smells like
January 23, 2025 at 7:14 PM
everyone is always concerned where the aliens are but nobody is asking what their feces looks and/or smells like