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FormerGregSamsa

@formergregsamsa.bsky.social

1.1K followers 830 following 29K posts

All phenomena are fleeting. He/him. For those who don't know me from other social media sites: Waffles (Waf) is the name of our dog, not the name of my husband. [Update: Waf was. Marlowe is now our dog's name, not my husband's. Waf is now a name for love.]

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 35m

Trump is gonna order the troops to raid the seas for their payment in sea shells.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 1h

This but the fart outtake.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 1h

Oh christ.

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 1h

I hate this timeline.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 1h

OMG they really are trying to be Nazis. Not even fake Nazis. James Woods--who did a lot of movies about resisting fascists--is like "Okay, here is how resisting fascism is bad." Check out 'Salvador' if you want to remember Woods in his good years.

hannah gais @hannahgais.bsky.social · 2h

Hey, what was happening in Germany in the 1930s? I forget.

James Woods
@RealJamesWoods
For those who actually respect history, the origin story of Antifa is well documented. Antifa is an organization that emerged with the “German Communist Antifaschistische Aktion” movement in the 1930’s.
German Communists smeared anyone to their right as "fascists,” a common ploy used by the ignorant hysterical activists of the Democrat Party today. Like today’s leftist loonies, the German Antifa of the Weimar years even labeled the leftwing SDP as "social fascists." Today’s Antifa are a paramilitary mob used by the usual suspects to foment fake “mass protests” and burn down cities. The same puppet masters of the Democrat activist judges ruining America today also fund these “useful idiots” of Antifa to impede the mandate given to the current President in his landslide last election victory.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

We're kinda amazed by his white muzzle. All of his fur is dark, but around his chin he looks like a 1890s prospector.

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

"We want a Jesus with hair."

"He was also not white. Why can't he also be bald?"

"We want a Jesus who has hair and doesn't know how to drive a car."

"I can wear a wig."

"Can you not drive a car?"

"I can wear a wig and not drive a car. I can shift--"

"Aha. No."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

What's all this then?

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

Vital Marlowe update

Marlowe, a tiny black dog with enormous pointy ears, stares directly into my face as I lay on the floor

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

Vital Marlowe update

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

Unfortunately, Mel Gibson has enough money to produce this shit independent of a studio.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

"I sweetie. Yeah, I'm still in Illinois. No, I'm not getting paid. I'm... well, here. How are the kids? No, I dunno when I'm coming back but you can handle it. Also pick up more shifts if you can. I'm staring at some guy in a frog suit but I'm sure our mortgage payments will be fine."

JFC.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 2h

So these people who enlisted to do things for their country are now in a sort of purgatory?

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

Again, I want a My So-Called Life special where Angela just talks shit about the actor who reminds her of Jordan Catalano and now also watches Leto get struck by lighting a lot. "I love the way he leans... on the pole where he's getting hit by lightning."

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"Jim. We'll give you a cameo. Does that work?"

"A pivotal scene?"

"No, it's a website."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

Avatar: The Passion

All five movies about a man who never comes home streaming soon on Hulu.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"I AM Jesus."

"You WERE Jesus. I need to go in a different direction. Have you seen the press about me."

"Oh. The 'glum cunt' thing? What's that got to do with me?"

"Jesus will now be played by Mahershala Ali. He won two--"

"I can be both young AND Black!"

"Whoa. No one said Jesus is Black."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"But. I was Jesus. It was a hit movie and I got struck by lightning twice while portraying him."

"..."

"Those lightening strikes were a kiss from my Father."

"..."

"God signed off on me being his son!"

"Jim. I don't think lightening means an endorsement. It's usually a critical pan."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"He is still 33 years old?"

"It happens directly after the events in the other movie."

"But he got crucified. Surely he looks older."

"Not your type of older."

"Nail me to the botox machine!"

"Jim. C'mon. Jesus would never do botox. That's for Lazarus. And me."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"Jim. I'm sorry. You're too old to play Jesus now."

"He's over 2000 years old."

"Not in this movie. He's still 33."

"He can look any age."

"Sorry yes but you can't."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

"The role of Jesus will now be played by Jared Leto."

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

...I'm sorry. Follow-ups? Plural. There's gonna be a second, third, and forth coming?

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

There are so many jokes to be made here. One of which is even in Hollywood, you can't bring Jesus back.

The Hollywood Reporter @thr.com · 10h

Jim Caviezel will not return to play Jesus Christ for director Mel Gibson‘s forthcoming follow-ups to the smash hit The Passion of the Christ, The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed.

Jim Caviezel Won’t Return as Jesus for Mel Gibson’s ‘Resurrection of the Christ’

Jim Caviezel will not return to play Jesus Christ for director Mel Gibson‘s forthcoming follow-ups to the smash hit The Passion of the Christ, The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed.

bit.ly

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FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

This is probably what got her the Twin Peaks directing gig.

FormerGregSamsa @formergregsamsa.bsky.social · 3h

There's a scene in Annie Hall where Diane Keaton's character talks about narcolepsy and I think in real life she just assumed all actors except her suffered from it.

Tom Reagan’s Hat @rufustsuperfly.bsky.social · 4h

RIP Diane Keaton
My favourite picture of her where everyone else is giving it their best Blue Steel & she looks like she’s just wandered in off the street looking super cool.
She was allowed to wear her own clothes & her wonderful personality shines out.
What a unique talent & human being.