Mystery John
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glempy.bsky.social
Mystery John
@glempy.bsky.social
Sojourning alchemist, and secret, underground tweetsmith. Grey Ace. He/Him
Erika Ishii is a treasure
I said what I said
It is extremely funny to me that Erika Ishii said this in a year she was the protagonist in a major video game
November 24, 2025 at 12:07 PM
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Just passed a small kid having a meltdown on the pavement and shouting, "I want to stay in my house" repeatedly, and I think we can all relate to that on a cold November morning.
November 24, 2025 at 8:46 AM
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the (rail replacement) vengabus is coming
and everybody's grumbling
some routes have been amended
journey times are extended
November 22, 2025 at 10:18 PM
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My cartoon in this weeks @newyorker.com
June 30, 2025 at 2:40 PM
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this is what will show up if you invite me to your ai & copyright law conference
November 6, 2025 at 6:40 PM
This is why she is the best wife. This will also be the second time we’ve seen the @themountaingoats.bsky.social within a week of our wedding anniversary
I know what @glempy.bsky.social likes… it’s concert tickets for his 40th birthday next year.
November 21, 2025 at 3:13 PM
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November 21, 2025 at 10:00 AM
This is the dream
At the end of the day, don’t we all just want a bookshelf with a rolling ladder?
November 20, 2025 at 7:22 PM
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November 20, 2025 at 8:00 AM
If I’m the smartest person in the room, that’s a pretty damning indictment of the room
November 19, 2025 at 7:58 PM
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Is it milk?
A handy guide to measuring like a Brit.
November 18, 2025 at 7:08 AM
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What I don’t like about pantsuits is that they tend to think being pastel or jewel toned is enough. It is not. I would and do wear resplendent pantsuits. Give me hussar braiding, people, not “menswear but no tie and lilac” or whatever! I like ties anyway. And waistcoats

Hussar, Dietrich, or get out
November 18, 2025 at 4:54 PM
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Twitter and chat gpt are down. Bad day for people who suck.
November 18, 2025 at 1:11 PM
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THREAD.

The definitive list of the absolute best interdimensional portals I have photographed on walks in the British countryside.

1. Gateway To The Land Of Leaping Dogs.
November 17, 2025 at 8:17 AM
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Using ChatGPT
What's something that isn't considered embarrassing but you think it should be?
August 23, 2025 at 7:01 AM
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she’s a 10 but Excel thinks she’s October
November 13, 2025 at 8:08 AM
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Folks it pains me to ask so bluntly, but could anyone use some work doing by me? I've got to find income for three months until my next royalty payment, and I'm not having much luck.
November 13, 2025 at 1:30 PM
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Nate is legitimately one of the best living writers in the UK. No-one can match his absolute mastery of the grotesque. You should hire him to write for you
Folks it pains me to ask so bluntly, but could anyone use some work doing by me? I've got to find income for three months until my next royalty payment, and I'm not having much luck.
November 13, 2025 at 3:21 PM
I love how work has replaced IT tickets with an AI chatbot so rather than just submitting an IT ticket, I need to say the right combination of things for the bot to point be at an FAQ I’ve already found, read, and decided is unhelpful.
November 13, 2025 at 1:01 PM
The strategic political genius at Labour HQ of thinking “what if we replace a man so bland he’s incapable of having his own thoughts and opinions, with someone everybody thinks is a cunt?”
November 12, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Not a novel, but my favourite opening line of mine is from a short story I wrote:

“I have looked upon the face of God, and all I saw was fear.”

rogueverbumancer.com/pictonauts/b...
November 11, 2025 at 1:04 PM
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Hoping this helps our colleagues across the industry
November 5, 2025 at 1:01 PM
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Happy November 10th! Some prime memes I have gathered
November 10, 2025 at 8:56 AM
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I also made a rare insult generator because I wanted to make something evil >:)
Rare Insults 🔥
Fresh burns delivered daily
dr.eamer.dev
November 8, 2025 at 11:52 PM
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inside you are two wolves
November 7, 2025 at 9:36 PM