Hannah Murray
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hannahmwrites.bsky.social
Hannah Murray
@hannahmwrites.bsky.social
Author, pervert, former sex worker, data nerd. I write sexy books, can ignore bad news until it’s irrelevant, and I know how to tie you up. Bi/pan, cis, she/her
Hugo spent an hour barking at the broom, and now that he’s saved us from the evil straw overlord, he’s enjoying a well deserved hero’s rest.
February 12, 2026 at 2:00 AM
I never knew this and yet I am not the least bit surprised.
Sometimes I remember Reagan removing Jimmy Carter’s solar panels and I think we’ve been enduring this shit for way too many years.
February 12, 2026 at 1:53 AM
I’m halfway through rearranging the living room. The puppy is confused/agitated, the child is resigned, the husband is wondering how many trips we’ll be making to the dump (at least 1), and the piano is heavy.
February 12, 2026 at 1:51 AM
I had to bring my kid to Barnes & Noble to get a book for her book report and this is at the checkout. Because this is the best they can do for Valentine’s Day literary romance swag, apparently. Gimme a goddamn break.
February 12, 2026 at 12:19 AM
My great-grandmother Sophronia was indeed born in Ontario, so I just need to dig out her birth certificate. Then my grandfather’s, my father’s, and mine. Hooking up with the Genealogy Queen (aka, Mormon MIL) tomorrow, who has all the subscriptions to all the genealogy sites, to get started. 🇨🇦
February 11, 2026 at 3:08 PM
I’m in my front yard in the chilly dark at 6:13 in the morning waiting for my puppy to find the perfect spot to poop.

I willingly signed up for this.
February 11, 2026 at 2:13 PM
Reposted by Hannah Murray
Imagine if waitresses could only legally work in state-approved diners, had to register on a public list, and faced arrest for working outside that system. That’s what “legalization” does to sex workers.
February 11, 2026 at 9:38 AM
I made sausage rolls, and ate half of them. I’m not sorry.
February 11, 2026 at 2:57 AM
“I’d love to have a doorbell camera so I’d never have to answer my door but I can’t afford a wired security setup and I refuse to have a ring since cops can just access it willy nilly without even telling me” is a thing I said on the Bad Place like, five years ago? More? It was never a secret.
February 11, 2026 at 2:22 AM
Age verification? I still use DOS keyboard shortcuts.
Age verification? My first remote for a TV had a wire ... connected to the TV. Long live Jerrold!
Age verification? My first computer screen was green.
February 11, 2026 at 1:12 AM
Oooh! My paternal great-grandmother’s family fled to Canada after the revolution (they were, ahem, on the wrong side of that one) then ended up in Michigan. I wonder if I can paper trail it. This might be where having a Mormon MIL obsessed with genealogy comes in handy!
I'm not saying that Canada is perfect, I'm saying that the bar is pretty low right now.
February 10, 2026 at 10:18 PM
These tedious, racist motherfuckers.
February 10, 2026 at 3:11 PM
Watching the Olympics. This 25 year old ski racer looks like a 45 year old in a Marlboro ad from 1974.
February 10, 2026 at 3:09 PM
Reposted by Hannah Murray
My dad sometimes remarks that some men simply "don't believe women are people" and I think about it a lot
this has massive "don't come to school tomorrow" vibes, like jesus fuck
February 9, 2026 at 9:41 PM
I have a split in my fingernail I’m covering with a bandage until it grows out. It got wet, so I asked my husband to get me a new one. Just a plain, wrap-around-a-finger-bandage. He’s not wearing his glasses. He’s come back twice with a waterproof bandage. “It looks like a regular one to me!” 😜
February 10, 2026 at 6:13 AM
Reposted by Hannah Murray
They're building concentration camps with my tax money Chuck. They're torturing children. They're murdering innocent people on the street. What are you doing.
Our DHS reform demands are exceedingly reasonable.

We're asking ICE to do nothing more than follow the standards that the vast majority of law enforcement agencies already follow.

Republicans, the ball is in your court. The clock is ticking.
February 10, 2026 at 3:45 AM
I saw a recipe on instagram that I really wanted details on, the full thing was on her newsletter, ok cool, oops that’s on Substack, I will be making something else.
tonight I ran across a newsletter about parenting and video games that I would've been interested in reading, but it was on Substack, so I read something else instead
February 10, 2026 at 3:58 AM
My kid asked me what trans was, it was literally a two sentence explanation, then she asks me shit like “how come Grandma always wants to control everything?” and I’m like girl, I’ve been in therapy for 30 years and I still don’t know.
always so funny to me when people are like “how am I supposed to explain Gay to my kids?” my kid asks me way harder shit all the time. “why did they build the road this way? why are some people bad?” I don’t know. please ask me about Gay
February 10, 2026 at 3:55 AM
I made steak with bourbon cream sauce, baguettes, a salad and tartiflette for dinner. A bastardized tartiflette, because I had to use Yukon potatoes instead of Charlottes and Brie instead of Reblochon because it’s not sold in the US (but some knob in Utah can sell raw milk). Anyway, it was delish.
February 10, 2026 at 3:52 AM
This American curler getting all sports guy when he has a good throw is so much fun, he's like YEAH BABEEEEE when his rock bumps the other rock on the bowling lane of ice like it's the Super Bowl because it is for him and he doesn't care if he looks like a goof, he's IN IT to WIN IT MOTHERFUCKERS
February 9, 2026 at 6:20 PM
My puppy has two barks in his crate: the “I’m lonely let me out” bark, and the “I’m about to shit in here” bark. Unfortunately, I can’t tell them apart yet.
February 9, 2026 at 3:25 PM
Is Lindsey Vonn courageous or delusional?
February 9, 2026 at 4:52 AM
I’m watching Olympic curling instead of the halftime show but happy to see all the awesome posts about it being amazing and brilliant.
February 9, 2026 at 1:34 AM
I don’t steal other people’s words, I make my own.

Fuck that thief.
February 8, 2026 at 3:18 PM
Name is destiny.
A kid named Loki was being loudly berated for misbehaving at the grocery store today, and I'm on Loki's side because what did you expect?
February 8, 2026 at 3:02 PM