Jake_Vig
@jakevig.bsky.social
Playing like a champion.
Just my stuff:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:4biy4v5nhe6h2wh25oveas64/feed/aaanqkdaizoek
Just my stuff:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:4biy4v5nhe6h2wh25oveas64/feed/aaanqkdaizoek
Pinned
Our groundhog-based weather science is not going to earn any additional respect from the aliens observing us.
February 2, 2026 at 3:38 PM
Our groundhog-based weather science is not going to earn any additional respect from the aliens observing us.
"You know who else saw his shadow thereby predicting six more weeks of winter? Well, he was but a humble carpenter from near the Sea of Galilee..."
February 2, 2026 at 3:37 PM
"You know who else saw his shadow thereby predicting six more weeks of winter? Well, he was but a humble carpenter from near the Sea of Galilee..."
Well, it took a lot of hard work, patience, time, blood, sweat and tears, but I'm pretty much in the exact same place.
February 2, 2026 at 1:53 PM
Well, it took a lot of hard work, patience, time, blood, sweat and tears, but I'm pretty much in the exact same place.
For a badass, I sure do use the term "samesies" a lot
February 2, 2026 at 1:50 PM
For a badass, I sure do use the term "samesies" a lot
[After 11th cup of coffee]
Can't for the life of me figure out why I'm so jittery
Can't for the life of me figure out why I'm so jittery
February 2, 2026 at 4:21 AM
[After 11th cup of coffee]
Can't for the life of me figure out why I'm so jittery
Can't for the life of me figure out why I'm so jittery
STYLIST: I have an idea.
CHAPPELL ROAN: Go ahead.
STYLIST: You know your nipples?
CHAPPELL ROAN: I'm listening.
CHAPPELL ROAN: Go ahead.
STYLIST: You know your nipples?
CHAPPELL ROAN: I'm listening.
February 2, 2026 at 4:12 AM
STYLIST: I have an idea.
CHAPPELL ROAN: Go ahead.
STYLIST: You know your nipples?
CHAPPELL ROAN: I'm listening.
CHAPPELL ROAN: Go ahead.
STYLIST: You know your nipples?
CHAPPELL ROAN: I'm listening.
White Men Can't Email
February 1, 2026 at 9:45 PM
White Men Can't Email
I fear Crocheting Bluesky more than any other group. They are vicious.
February 1, 2026 at 8:53 PM
I fear Crocheting Bluesky more than any other group. They are vicious.
Reposted by Jake_Vig
Careful, there—that’s a load-bearing defense mechanism.
December 23, 2024 at 4:44 AM
Careful, there—that’s a load-bearing defense mechanism.
Reposted by Jake_Vig
Just think about the amazing Epstein scoops the new CBS Evening News contributors will have just by interviewing each other.
February 1, 2026 at 7:34 PM
Just think about the amazing Epstein scoops the new CBS Evening News contributors will have just by interviewing each other.
Carlos Alcaraz is not only incredibly talented, he loves his job as much as any athlete I've seen.
February 1, 2026 at 5:08 PM
Carlos Alcaraz is not only incredibly talented, he loves his job as much as any athlete I've seen.
Buckle up for "they can't let the midterms happen"
February 1, 2026 at 4:13 AM
Buckle up for "they can't let the midterms happen"
Movie idea:
"Groundhog Day" meets "Edge of Tomorrow"
"Groundhog Day" meets "Edge of Tomorrow"
February 1, 2026 at 2:13 AM
Movie idea:
"Groundhog Day" meets "Edge of Tomorrow"
"Groundhog Day" meets "Edge of Tomorrow"
Reposted by Jake_Vig
Insomnia is my co-pilot.
January 29, 2026 at 7:34 AM
Insomnia is my co-pilot.
Before you say you hate this timeline, keep in mind that there are still plenty of asteroids out there.
February 1, 2026 at 12:39 AM
Before you say you hate this timeline, keep in mind that there are still plenty of asteroids out there.
Reposted by Jake_Vig
Beginning to understand why the kids were eating tide pods there for a bit.
January 31, 2026 at 8:24 PM
Beginning to understand why the kids were eating tide pods there for a bit.
It is funny that Elon might not be implicated in the Epstein scandal because he was too lame even for people who thought Alan Dershowitz was cool.
February 1, 2026 at 12:31 AM
It is funny that Elon might not be implicated in the Epstein scandal because he was too lame even for people who thought Alan Dershowitz was cool.
Reposted by Jake_Vig
[pulls out earbud] i’m sorry what was that, your honor
January 31, 2026 at 10:01 PM
[pulls out earbud] i’m sorry what was that, your honor
Reposted by Jake_Vig
Qanon metastasized over liberals exchanging messages like "I'm hungry, what toppings should we get on the pizza?" & deactivated because it turns out the real conspiracy was conservative emails reading "hey Jeff, what's a good time for me to visit your pedophile island so we can molest kids?"
February 1, 2026 at 12:16 AM
Qanon metastasized over liberals exchanging messages like "I'm hungry, what toppings should we get on the pizza?" & deactivated because it turns out the real conspiracy was conservative emails reading "hey Jeff, what's a good time for me to visit your pedophile island so we can molest kids?"
Reposted by Jake_Vig
A drag queen who rents moving trailers and trucks named Ru-Haul
a drag queen who owns a beerpub named Brue Paul
a vengeful drag queen named Rue the Day Paul
January 31, 2026 at 8:11 PM
A drag queen who rents moving trailers and trucks named Ru-Haul
Epstein had a private rape island and the wealthiest and most powerful men in the world were like "Dude, when can I come over?"
January 31, 2026 at 8:00 PM
Epstein had a private rape island and the wealthiest and most powerful men in the world were like "Dude, when can I come over?"
a drag queen with Minions named Gru Paul
a drag queen who loves heavy metal named Mötley Crüe Paul
a drag queen who owns a beerpub named Brue Paul
January 31, 2026 at 7:58 PM
a drag queen with Minions named Gru Paul
In the darkest times, may the silliest things amuse you.
January 31, 2026 at 7:56 PM
In the darkest times, may the silliest things amuse you.
a drag queen who loves heavy metal named Mötley Crüe Paul
a drag queen who owns a beerpub named Brue Paul
a vengeful drag queen named Rue the Day Paul
January 31, 2026 at 7:56 PM
a drag queen who loves heavy metal named Mötley Crüe Paul