Author | Lightnews

Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

I feel like Frozone really SHOULD get that slot before her, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

And yes, I know that didn't exactly work, because it's a biFROST bridge, not a biFROZEN bridge, but I wanted to do a thing about Disney and Marvel and Norse mythology and bi-ness and icy-ness and I've had a few cocktails and I'm posting from bed so just go with it

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

He meets all the other bi Disney characters after traveling the bifrost bridge, the bi-est and frozen-est bridge in town

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Like you're saying the last word of the Pleistocene Epoch, and then "-ul"

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Enjoy your Freudian phallic symbol

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

It's worth the trip!

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

I'm such a sucker for a throwaway sight gag in a goofy Season 7 monster-of-the-week episode

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Well then you might just win best costume. Or all the boys might wanna eat you. Either way it's a good night

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Am I gonna show up for this dressed as Anya in that episode where she robs a bank to impress a 16 year old highschool quarterback? Maaaaaaaaybe

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Reposted by Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer

Slayerfest 98: A Queer Podcast @slayerfestx98.bsky.social · 4d

If you’re in NYC, you should check out @lighterfandango.bsky.social’s Buffy trivia at rock bar on the 29th - there might even be some SF98 themed prizes 😘

Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Think you know Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Prove it! Rockbar NYC. 7pm, Wednesday October 29th.

Have some Black Frost beer with up to five of your favorite Scoobies and win fabulous prizes at a trivia night that'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Trivia. Wednesday, October 29 @7PM. Big Stakes. Bigger Drama. Come Slay!

Rockbar NYC, 185 Christopher St NYC

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

You've got like almost two weeks! Binge, girl

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Legit, I'm so excited to see people's faces when I reveal these prizes, because all your stuff is awesome

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Special prize for best costume

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 4d

Think you know Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Prove it! Rockbar NYC. 7pm, Wednesday October 29th.

Have some Black Frost beer with up to five of your favorite Scoobies and win fabulous prizes at a trivia night that'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

I'd say pretty solidly above average, just from my own scientific studies

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

Wait, where?

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

Yes, great minds DO spend a Tuesday evening instructing a newly horny AI to write them a story about how they got real swole under the orders of a fairytale witch, alike

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

It's so close to a Doctor Who episode....

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

Again, i'd like it on the record that I photograph extremely well. Like, model well. But, of course, I can only do that when I'm photographed exclusively by professionals at an angle that does most of the work for me, If I'm honest

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

Okay, but if a twink with a "decent face and better than average dick" fetish comes by, I saw him first

Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

"Why does his beauty look so nasty tho?" is the widely accepted dystopian government's response

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

If you come for my one and only gig right now I swear to christ...

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

"I'm an enigmatic beauty!" I'll scream as I get sent off to the Twilight Zone ugly camps

Still from Eye of the Beholder, a season 2 episode of The Twilight Zone, where hot people are considered too ugly to exist, and the prevailing beauty standard is "weird pig faced monsters." But the protagonist is just sent off to live with all the hot people in the wasteland, where I assume they all just live like Burning Man and have a ton of smelly but sexy desert orgies

I'd probably bang one of the pig faced mutants once, tho, just to say I've done it

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

No, you don't understand. I photograph VERY well, but only from an angle I haven't discovered yet

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Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer @lighterfandango.bsky.social · 7d

I dunno, there's only so far you can go with "directly behind the back of the head"