Matt Cooney
@mattcooney.org
Dad to Logan, the bravest kid I know, and Olivia, the best dancer and singer I know. Married to Erica, the most patient woman I know 😉
Work for a hospital doing computer related things.
mattcooney.org/blog
https://hachyderm.io/@MattCC716
Work for a hospital doing computer related things.
mattcooney.org/blog
https://hachyderm.io/@MattCC716
Call CPS
The parents of the first baby born in 2026 in this county outside Baltimore got their name ideas from ChatGPT. Hudson Oakley Winkler.
www.baltimoresun.com/2026/01/01/c...
www.baltimoresun.com/2026/01/01/c...
ChatGPT named Carroll County’s first-born baby in 2026
The first baby born in Carroll County in 2026 was named with help from ChatGPT, a generative artificial intelligence chatbot.
www.baltimoresun.com
January 2, 2026 at 3:46 PM
Call CPS
Green Day!
And it’s good Green Day
And it’s good Green Day
January 1, 2026 at 11:47 PM
Green Day!
And it’s good Green Day
And it’s good Green Day
Hi, I’m a rollover car accident on the Thruway
January 1, 2026 at 11:46 PM
Hi, I’m a rollover car accident on the Thruway
Reposted by Matt Cooney
"Dang, Indiana is legit..."
January 1, 2026 at 11:10 PM
"Dang, Indiana is legit..."
Reposted by Matt Cooney
“back in my day” guy absolutely jamming out during the halftime show
January 1, 2026 at 6:53 PM
“back in my day” guy absolutely jamming out during the halftime show
Reposted by Matt Cooney
writing a strongly worded letter to ESPN about how they gave us two full segments of guys talking at halftime and then cut away from Semi-Charmed Life before they made it through the full song
January 1, 2026 at 6:54 PM
writing a strongly worded letter to ESPN about how they gave us two full segments of guys talking at halftime and then cut away from Semi-Charmed Life before they made it through the full song
The commentary on the Orange Bowl would be more enjoyable if we had a Holey Moley reunion of Tessitore and Rob Riggle.
January 1, 2026 at 6:17 PM
The commentary on the Orange Bowl would be more enjoyable if we had a Holey Moley reunion of Tessitore and Rob Riggle.
Let’s not. That was 2024 & 2025
January 1, 2026 at 6:11 PM
Let’s not. That was 2024 & 2025
That 9pm americano was not the smartest thing I did in 2025.
January 1, 2026 at 5:35 AM
That 9pm americano was not the smartest thing I did in 2025.
One cool thing about fresh snow at night:
It never gets dark outside. I could go walking thru the neighborhood right now without need for a flashlight. And I could see everything.
It never gets dark outside. I could go walking thru the neighborhood right now without need for a flashlight. And I could see everything.
January 1, 2026 at 5:33 AM
One cool thing about fresh snow at night:
It never gets dark outside. I could go walking thru the neighborhood right now without need for a flashlight. And I could see everything.
It never gets dark outside. I could go walking thru the neighborhood right now without need for a flashlight. And I could see everything.
Reposted by Matt Cooney
Happy New Year
January 1, 2026 at 5:14 AM
Happy New Year
Reposted by Matt Cooney
BREAKING: Explosions felt across New York City as full socialism begins
January 1, 2026 at 5:10 AM
BREAKING: Explosions felt across New York City as full socialism begins
I wish any pizza place had pizza with cheese as stretchy as they cheese in Pizza Hut ads
January 1, 2026 at 5:16 AM
I wish any pizza place had pizza with cheese as stretchy as they cheese in Pizza Hut ads
Reposted by Matt Cooney
It’s not like you have to make a big dramatic change in the new year, but leaning into what is good and learning to be better is always a great place to start.
Happy New Year.
Happy New Year.
January 1, 2026 at 5:12 AM
It’s not like you have to make a big dramatic change in the new year, but leaning into what is good and learning to be better is always a great place to start.
Happy New Year.
Happy New Year.
Daughter, as walking upstairs to bed: “that’s it? That was disappointing”
She thought the ball would shatter or explode or something.
Which would be very entertaining
She thought the ball would shatter or explode or something.
Which would be very entertaining
January 1, 2026 at 5:09 AM
Daughter, as walking upstairs to bed: “that’s it? That was disappointing”
She thought the ball would shatter or explode or something.
Which would be very entertaining
She thought the ball would shatter or explode or something.
Which would be very entertaining
Reposted by Matt Cooney
The neighborhood ne’er-do-wells are setting off fireworks.
a bald man in a tan jacket is sitting in a chair with a netflix logo on the bottom right
ALT: a bald man in a tan jacket is sitting in a chair with a netflix logo on the bottom right
media.tenor.com
January 1, 2026 at 5:03 AM
The neighborhood ne’er-do-wells are setting off fireworks.
Reposted by Matt Cooney
That looks like 2024 you fucks
January 1, 2026 at 5:01 AM
That looks like 2024 you fucks
Happy New Year BlueSky
a happy new year greeting card with gold numbers 2026
ALT: a happy new year greeting card with gold numbers 2026
media.tenor.com
January 1, 2026 at 5:00 AM
Happy New Year BlueSky
Richard Quest Cleopatra.
a cat is laying on a tiled floor with the word dies written on it
ALT: a cat is laying on a tiled floor with the word dies written on it
media.tenor.com
January 1, 2026 at 4:52 AM
Richard Quest Cleopatra.
If you’re not watching CNN on NYE, you’re doing it wrong.
January 1, 2026 at 4:51 AM
If you’re not watching CNN on NYE, you’re doing it wrong.
Reposted by Matt Cooney
Anderson Cooper is currently doing a live reading of Taylor Swift’s “Wood” on the air 10 minutes before the ball drops
January 1, 2026 at 4:50 AM
Anderson Cooper is currently doing a live reading of Taylor Swift’s “Wood” on the air 10 minutes before the ball drops